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Categorized | Andy

Pointless Exercise: Braves at Cubs, 1:20 p.m., 5/26

Posted on 26 May 2006 by Andy

Today’s GameCast brought to you by:

Pitching matchup:

Braves: Tim Hudson, 4-3, 3.95 ERA
Cubs: The Lawnmower, 3-2, 3.53 ERA

Lineups

Braves

Marcus Giles, 2b
Edgar Rentererror, ss
Larry Wayne Jones, 3b
Andruw, cf
Adam LaRoche, 1b
Jeff Francouer, rf (Watch, he’ll walk like 14 times this weekend.)
Ryan Langerhans, lf
Todd Pratt, c
Tim Hudson, p

Cubs
Unlucky Pierre, cf
Neifi?, 2b
Disgusted Bat Flip, 1b
Michael “10 days in the hole” Barrett, c
Jock, rf
E-ramis, 3b
Freddie Bynum, lf (You have to be shitting me.)
Ron Ce, ss
Carlos, p

193 Comments For This Post

  1. Jack Bauer Says:

    I’ve had enough of this shit. Get me Dusty on the phone, NOW!

  2. Ryan Theriot Says:

    Freddy Bynum and Neifi get to start and I am sent to the minors???????? Maybe I should have gotten on me knees in Dusty’s Office when he asked.

  3. Danyelle Sargeant Says:

    What the F*CK was THAT?

  4. Carlos Says:

    Lawnmower? That’s what I should be pushing instead of pitching.

  5. therick711 Says:

    Does anyone know why we don’t start Berut at first and catch Hank? Is it because we don’t have Macias on the bench?

  6. AC Says:

    How bad has it gotten that I am pissed off that Tony Womack isnt playing??

  7. Chloe O'Brian Says:

    Warning! Jack! The computer is showing that this lineup could be so bad it may actually implode, and create a swirling vortex of negative energy putting everyone at Wrigley Field at risk.

  8. Fast Freddy Says:

    I’m just keepin’ left warm for my boy, Tony Dubs. He should be here any day now.

  9. Matt Murton and Wayne Messmer Says:

    you wanna go hang at Hi Tops?

  10. INS agent Says:

    Actually Carlos, your people should continue doing the jobs white Americans don’t seem to want to do, like general manage the Cubs for instance.

  11. Mike D. Says:

    Has MacPhail been fired yet? He took a beating in the press. Maybe that’ll instead earn him a promotion while Crane Kenney tees up on #1.

  12. RF Bleacher Bums Says:

    Hey, Jacque made a nice catch. BOOOOOOOOOO!

  13. Carlos Says:

    I will find a way to walk Jeff Franceour. I know it can be done.

  14. Carlos Says:

    bases loaded, no hitter in effect.

  15. Tom Cruise Says:

    10 Days in the Hole was what John Travolta and I called our vacation together.

  16. Carlos' WHIP Says:

    I’m getting bloated.

  17. Pitch Count Says:

    Wow. 30 of me in the first inning by Carlos, and it isn’t even over yet.

  18. Carlos Says:

    I knew I could do it.
    (points to the sky)

  19. Carlos Says:

    Imagine the pressure on me, knowing that I have to throw a perfect game and even if I do, nine or ten innings might go by without my offense scoring a single run. Then I’ll get taken down for Super Novoa and we will lose. This is no way to pitch. So if I walk 6 or 7 guys today, I blame the offense. Also, I would like to thank my English teacher for helping me type this.

  20. luclax15 Says:

    i’m not watching the game, but it seems like Carlos might be a little wild today, no?

  21. Pitch Count vs Post Count Says:

    Zambrano’s 2 to 1 ahead of me.

  22. Carlos Says:

    still got a no hitter going female doggies

  23. Lord above Says:

    Hey Carlos, don’t point at me after that shit.

  24. Home plate umpire Says:

    You can thank me for getting out of that, Carlos. Strike No. 2 to Langerhans was 14 inches outside. Now don’t kill me.

  25. 1st inning Says:

    Carlos threw 37 pitches. I bet Hudson gets out of the bottom half with just 8.

  26. Tim Hudson Says:

    What fraction of Carlos’s pitches will I throw in the first inning? 1/2? 1/3? 1/4?

  27. Juan Pierre Says:

    Will someone please buy me a hat that fits?

  28. CT Says:

    What is it about Neifi that makes Baker want to bat him 2nd? Did he learn nothing from last year? Hendry should be calling the dugout right now and firing him.

  29. Tony Womak Says:

    I hit .500 in AAA, in 15 at bats, whoop de ******* doo.

  30. Juan Pierre Says:

    That was a scrappy popout.

  31. Hat buyer Says:

    As you long as you put it on straight, #27.

  32. Albert Einstein Says:

    How do you hit .500 in 15 at bats?

  33. Tony Womak Says:

    .4666666666666666666666 Einstein, ok, I wasn’t being literal.

  34. Tim Hudson Says:

    11 pitches, bitches

  35. therick711 Says:

    The IMMORTAL Todd Pratt. How can you take a team serious that plays Todd Pratt?

  36. therick711 Says:

    Jock Jones can’t even flip the ball in to the stands right.

  37. CT Says:

    Well, you can go on the radio and tell the fans that the season isn’t over yet and everything will be fine when your injured players get back and that really, the problem is we don’t have any clutch hitting. Then your manager can start Neifi Perez and Freddy Bynum the next day. What were we talking about?

  38. RF fans Says:

    Jacque Jones tried to throw the ball into the stands after catching the last out but threw it straight up instead. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  39. Any Inept Cubs joke Says:

    Actually comes true. No team sticks to being horrific and predictably bad like the Cubs.

  40. Carlos Zambrano Says:

    6 pitches, Timmy. Your move.

    (Yes, I know. You’ll pitch 9 innings and I’ll be out in the 5th, but cut me some slack, hombre. Look at my team).

  41. Adversity Says:

    The Cubs have never been able to cope with me. Ever.

  42. Len Kasper Says:

    I love slipping in Tom Petty Quotes.

  43. E-Ramis Says:

    somebody bring me my inhalier, (and some pacakes) stat!

  44. Ram Ram Says:

    Getting my swing back, beeches.

  45. Tom Petty Says:

    Let me guess….Free Fallin’?

  46. Bynum Says:

    Am I seriously batting behind A-Ram?

  47. In play, out(s) recorded Says:

    This should be our slogan for the year.

  48. Matt Murton Says:

    Gee, a weak grounder to the pitcher, I couldn’t have done that. I’m not lefthanded.

  49. Why Says:

    is Bynum even on this team? Gawd…

  50. Carlos Says:

    Hey! There’s a poster of me behind home plate! Estoy muy guapo!

  51. Carlos Says:

    16 pitches in 2 innings. I have settled down.

  52. Gawd Says:

    Bynum is on the team so Murton can watch 24 in the clubhouse during sunny days. Redheads burn easily.

  53. Juan Pierre Says:

    Good think I got neifi in the 2 hole to lay down a sac bunt with 2 outs.

  54. luclax15 Says:

    how did Lucky get a bunt all the way to center?

  55. DPappy Says:

    How sad is it that I don’t want our #1 hitter to attempt a stolen base and take the chance of being the 3rd out so that our #2 hitter doesn’t start off the next inning.

    Geez, this is depressing. It’s like we have two bottoms to this order and one just happens to be at the top.

  56. Neifi Says:

    yup, that’s right, I’m squaring to bunt with 2 outs.

  57. Tom Petty Says:

    Len:

    Beats slipping in dogshit.

  58. Juan Pierre Says:

    My single was sort of to center field. I somehow managed to hit a line drive that got through the infield, but died in the grass 20 feet behind second base.

  59. Cubs Fans Says:

    I’d rather watch Becker right now. Can we see Becker? Please?

  60. Carlos Says:

    Despite a rough inning here or there. I am really good. Please trade me, ASAP.

  61. luclax15 Says:

    wait wait wait… he got a single on a ball he hit by SWINGING the bat? sacre bleu!

  62. Dusty Baker Says:

    Yep dudes, #52 is right. You see, I’ve learned something this year. My racism had blinded me. I always that a cracker is a cracker, that they all held up the same in the hot sun (poorly). I’ve learned that that’s not true. I now know that red-headed crackers take the heat even worse than normal lilly white crackers. I’ll never be racist again.

  63. The Cubs Says:

    Sacrifice bunt attempts from cleanup hitters. Feel the baseball excitement!

  64. morpheus Says:

    Wow… calling for the bunt, in a 1-0 game with the #4 hitter up.

  65. Barrett Says:

    AM I REALLY BUNTING????

  66. Jock Says:

    Stop booing me, I did good! Eh, fine. Screw you too Cubs fans.

  67. F****n' Freddie says Says:

    Time to kill this rally.

  68. FFFFB! Says:

    Nice work man.

    FFFB: Living up to the “hype” since 2006

  69. Were winning! Says:

    Why am I not excited?

  70. Carlos Says:

    Is this the best start ever that began with 5 walks in the 1st inning?
    I still got the no hitter going female doggies.

  71. Hey Andy Says:

    Tune in to the Cubs game! You just missed a promo for 24. It was awesome.

  72. Neifi? Says:

    Three AB’s.
    Five pitches.
    Three outs.

    That’s efficiency, bitches!

  73. CT Says:

    Neifi, you call that efficiency? I expect at least one GIDP.

  74. Calorie Mate Says:

    Hey! You a Metal Gear fan!? Calorie Mate!

  75. Neifi? Says:

    Someone has to get on base in front of me first.

  76. Mike D. Says:

    Whoever said the actual word (#70) should be beaten with Chip Caray’s clown shoes.

  77. Fast Freddie Says:

    Dingers!

  78. morpheus Says:

    Uh oh, Murt will never see the starting lineup again.

  79. Dusty Says:

    Look at freddie my RBI machine.

  80. Dusty Says:

    A white guy definitely could not have done that.

  81. Dusty Says:

    See Dudes, FFFB hit a homer. I think we found our new cleanup hitter.

  82. SD Says:

    You know its unrequited and unfair hatred when you feel ill after a guy you hate hits a homer.

  83. Dusty Says:

    Tomorrow’s Linupe

    Pierre CF
    Tony 2B
    Neifi SS
    Bynum LF
    Mabry 1B
    Jones RF
    Blanco C
    Ramirez 3B
    Marshall P

  84. Freddy "How Far Did it Fly" Bynum Says:

    feel my power femae doggies.

  85. Fast Freddy Bynum Says:

    All hail the slamma from Alabama!

  86. Fast Freddy Bynum Says:

    Even if I’m really from North Carolina

  87. Freddy Bynum Says:

    See I do more then give dusty sexual favors.

  88. Fast Freddy Fucking Boom Boom Bynum Says:

    You can call me FFFBBB

  89. Spaghetti Arm Zambrano Says:

    No chance I make it 9 innings today. 115+ pitches already

  90. 160 pitches Says:

    Will Carlos throw me today?

  91. Desipiot Says:

    Do all Desipio acronyms have to have a B and and F in them? This is confusing. DFB DBF FFB FFFBBB

  92. Jacque Jones Says:

    JJP!

  93. Black Farns Says:

    Woo hoo! Give me the ball for the 8th!!

  94. Why DO We Hate Him Today Says:

    1 Guess

  95. Zambrano Says:

    There goes the nono, which a–hole jinxed it up there.

  96. D.L Hughley Says:

    I just broke up the no-hitter.

  97. morpheus Says:

    Wilson F’n Betemit? THE Wilson F’n Betemit?

  98. JJ Says:

    Im a defensive superstar.

  99. Ryan Dempster Says:

    Do I *have* to pitch today, coach? Huh?

  100. Chip Caray Says:

    Hey Gang. It’s howry doody time.

  101. Dusty: to Ryan Says:

    Not if I bring in Novoa, he’s always good for a few innings of batting practice.

  102. Dusty Says:

    Jacque dropped that because they don’t have sun in the metrodome.

  103. Robert Novoa Says:

    Hey, what up with that. Why does Howry get to play? It’s my job to let in inherited runners.

  104. TG Says:

    How will Jock die after this inning? I say Carlos, in the tunnel, with the fungo bat.

  105. Carlos Says:

    Jacque did me a favor.
    Dustly would have kept me in for 200 pitches just to get the no hitter.

  106. Pat Hughes Says:

    Ronny, you may wanna work on your pronunciation of the word Peanuts. Peanits is probably not the way to gor.

  107. Paul Says:

    Admit it, boys. You miss having these Gamecasts and then checking back in at the message board to see that I’ve made 36 consecutive posts about the game.

  108. Dan Pasqua Says:

    Too bad Betemit broke up hte no-hitter. Just don’t break up my one-hitter.

  109. Not Paul Says:

    We miss being enlightened about dolphins.

  110. Langerhans Says:

    Web gem.

  111. Neifi Perez Says:

    Hey look at me, I got a hit, raised my BA, I’m almost at the Menodza line.

  112. I was in a meeting Says:

    Jock really dropped a fly ball? I actually, truly feel bad for him. I’m not kidding. I feel bad for a guy that made more money to drop that fly ball than I will make this fiscal year.

  113. Braves Fans Says:

    We’re losing to this team? We will now slit our wrists and do push ups in alcohol.

  114. Baker Basher Says:

    Yeah, #107. About as much as they miss me.

  115. Polio Says:

    I’m about as missed as you two (107 and 114)

  116. Scott Eyre Says:

    Am I the worst defensive pitcher ever?

  117. morpheus Says:

    So, how on earth does a runner score from 3rd on a ground ball to the pitcher? Gameday doesn’t say things like “Eyre trips over own stomach roll while fielding…”

  118. FDR Says:

    **** YOU 115!

  119. Scott Eyre Says:

    I was trying to turn a 1-6-3 DP, but I made a terrible throw to second base that almost went into center field. Neifi saved me dude. He made a leaping grab, but could not turn the DP.

  120. DPappy Says:

    #117 – Eyre threw the ball high to Neifi at second who had to jump to catch the ball, then land on second base just to get the first out. Needless to say, his throw to first was late.

  121. Danyelle Sargeant Says:

    What the **** was THAT?

  122. DPappy Says:

    Santo just told Hughes that this pitcher is so big that if he was on the golf course putting, he’d have to do it by memory. Didn’t someone tell Eyre to get off the mound and in to the dugout after the 3rd out?

  123. Can of Gasoline Says:

    Here i come ladies and gents!

  124. Remlinger Says:

    HEY ASSHOLES! REMEMBER ME?

  125. Inning ending GIDP Says:

    I like my chances.

  126. Baker Says:

    This will be two straight days without a loss. As that one dude’s avatar says, “Extend me.”

  127. Billy Bob Thornton err...Mike Remlinger Says:

    Define irony: I bitch about Chip Carray in Chicago, I go back to Atlanta and the son of a bitch follows me here. Is that some fucked up shit or what? Almost as fucked up as my pitching…

  128. busty daker Says:

    he cant swing the bat with bruised ribs……why did i do that???

  129. Answer Says:

    You don’t have much else on the bench?

  130. Leonard Kasper Says:

    Hi Leo!

  131. MLB Gamecast Says:

    I suck balls today.

  132. Lee Corso Says:

    NOT so fast #126

  133. morpheus Says:

    After all, Dusty, Remlinger is a LOOGY, right? At least you thought so. Why not put Murt up there in that situation?

  134. Dusty Says:

    Why don’t I put Murton up there? He’s white. He can’t play in the sun.

    You can next expect Murton to start in September when the kids get their chance to play.

  135. SD Says:

    Hmmmm…..

  136. ryan dumpster Says:

    i do not want to save this game

  137. Stomach Acid Level Says:

    Rising.

  138. Dumpster Says:

    Remember when I was the balls.

  139. Ron Santo Says:

    What is GOING ON?

  140. Dumpster Says:

    Remember when you all thought I was a solid closer?

  141. Cum Dumpster Says:

    I want to make sure you get a bottom of the ninth. Everyone gets extra baseball! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

  142. Walk 4, then K 3 Says:

    Dempster has a 2 run save under his belt by way of me before

  143. johnny b Says:

    that has to be it for me

  144. busty daker Says:

    here we go again………seattle here i come

  145. Strike Zone Says:

    I’m over here! No… no… over here! yooohooo! Here I am!

  146. SD Says:

    Wow.

    ******* wow.

  147. Holy Shit! Says:

    The Cubs really do invent new ways to lose don’t they?

  148. Chicago Cubs Says:

    We just gave up on the season!

  149. DPappy Says:

    Un-*******-believable. Are you SHITTING me? Two runs score on a sac fly? GEEZ!

  150. Irony Says:

    Thy name is Jaque and Neifi costing Dusty his job…

  151. Neifi! Says:

    oops

  152. Mike D. Says:

    Much appreciate dif someone illustrates th following.

    “Andruw Jones out on a sacrifice fly to right fielder Jacque Jones. Brayan Pena scores. Marcus Giles scores. Edgar Renteria to 3rd. Missed catch error by second baseman Neifi Perez. Throwing error by second baseman Neifi Perez. ”

    BTW I’m not even pulling for the Cubs. I’m pulling for an apocaplyse. I have Zambrano on my roto team and I’m not even that bothered. Bring on the bloodhsed. I’m beyond feeling pain anyway.

  153. WGN Says:

    We just showed a pissed off fan heckling the Cubs. Wonder what he had to say.

  154. Anonymous Says:

    according to GameCast, Neifi! committed 2 errors in one play. what happened?

  155. Sick of it Says:

    I really, REALLY, after 32 years of being a CUB fan might be done. I can’t take any more of this.

  156. busty daker Says:

    this was part of my plan all along…….have neifi blow the game…get me fired……and now i can cash my ticket to seattle

  157. SD Says:

    Now THAT’s how you follow up making two errors to cost your team the ballgame. Weakly flail and fail at making a stabbing bunt.

  158. DPappy Says:

    Wow……..that’s a hell of a greeting Wrigley gave to Neifi to start the bottom of the inning.

  159. SD Says:

    **** you Neifi.

  160. 2 Runs on Score Sac Fly Says:

    Deep fly ball. Neifi Botches the relay catch, which sends Giles towards home. He then botches the throw.

  161. The unpossible Says:

    Bases loaded, Jones hits a deep fly to the warning track. Jones catches it and tosses it in to Neifi, who nonchalantly tries to catch it in shallow right. The ball gets away from him by a few feet and Giles never stops running. Neifi throws it 10 feet over Barrett’s head and Giles is safe. Unbelievable.

  162. nehi Says:

    in spring training dusty said i was bad enough to start at second…..and look here i am!!

  163. SD Says:

    **** you Dusty.

  164. Neifi! Says:

    Sorry guys, but I was Dusty’s MVP last year!

  165. Mike D. Says:

    Thanks. I hate to be macabre, but I’m enjoying this. Sorry if that bothers any other die-hards, but I can’t help it. Crash ‘n’ Burn baby. Crash. And. Burn.

  166. Losing Streak Says:

    Do you think this one will be in single digits?

  167. President David Palmer Says:

    S’up fellas. So we’re gonna be seeing a lot more of each other from here on out I guess….

  168. Mike Remlinger Says:

    Thanks for the “W”. It’s not like you’ve had experience stranding runners on third w/fewer than one out. No really. That kind of experience makes you guys experts, and I was the beneficiary of that expertise today. thank you.

  169. TG Says:

    I’m with you, Mike. There’s something disgustingly enjoyable about this whole thing.

  170. TG Says:

    I’m with you, Mike. There’s something disgustingly enjoyable about this whole thing.

  171. TG Says:

    So enjoyable I had to post twice?

  172. The Baffled Disgust & Loathing in Len's Voice Says:

    I’m palpable.

  173. Chuck Says:

    Me 3, Mike and TG

  174. Some Guy Says:

    I turn on the game in the seventh, and am shocked to find the Cubs ahead, and I mistakenly think they have a good shot to win this one. Then Dempster can’t get anyone out, Perez makes TWO(!) errors on one play, allowing the go-ahead run to score. You would think that they had exhausted every possible way to lose, and then Neifi comes along. Blow this sorry excuse for a team up and start over.

  175. Al Pollyellon Says:

    Well we sat in left field today and watched Neifi loaf after a relay throw as a hungrier, more determined Atlanta team outhustled the Cubs (once again) to victory.

    It’s really too bad. A tough way to lose. Really. But it was warm out there, and sunny, and it reminded me of why we come out there in the first place.

    It’ll happen for us soon, Cub fans. Keep the faith.

  176. 1060west Says:

    Where was Tony Womack? Did he not have enough time to take the Tribune bicycle from Iowa to the ballpark today?

  177. Duncety Bonker Says:

    To stick it further up your asses I’m letting my 198 hitting, no catching, no throwing 2005 MVP lead off the ninth. I know, I know I’ve got Murton,
    JHJr, I’ve even got Wood & GLemon Rusch hitting better than nutless perez, but ****you. What am I going to do bench Neifi? After all he’s done?

  178. Cub Fan Says:

    If my wife treated me this way I’d kick the bitch out.

  179. 1060west Says:

    .198 does speak volumes. Gotta go with the Everything man. What a doofus. Kick his ass out of here and bring in Crazy Uncle Lou.

  180. nehi Says:

    god……i could go for a cold neifi right now!

  181. Neifi! Says:

    How could you not want me here? After all I have done? Who was Dusty’s 2005 MVP? Not Lee… ME! Neifi!

  182. morpheus Says:

    B&B on WSCR are supposedly reporting that Dusty’s porstgame presser got cut short by the Cubs’ PR… anyone else hear this?

  183. morpheus Says:

    That’s “postgame”

  184. HASTA AQUI Says:

    ESTO YA FUE DEMASIADO! NO PUEDE SER QUE
    ESTE CABRON CONTINUE SIENDO EL MANAGER!
    HAY QUE CORRERLOS A TODOS.. BOLA DE
    HUEVONES… ES INCREIBLE QUE SE PIERDA DE
    ESTA FORMA! YA NO VAYAN AL PINCHE ESTADIO!
    VAMOS A ENSEÑARLE A LOS DE ARRIBA QUE NO
    ESTAMOS DE ACUERDO CON ESTE MUGRERO.
    NO TIENEN VERGUENZA. Y SE DICEN PROFESIONALES.
    YA BASTA DE TANTA MIERDA.
    HAY SOLO 2 O 3 QUE SE SALVAN, LOS DEMAS:
    FUERA! FUERA! FUERA! FUERA! FUERA!
    SON UNA VERGUENZA!
    LES FALTAN PANTALONES. YA LARGUENSE!!!
    FUERA!
    FUERA!
    FUERA!

  185. Some Guy Says:

    On the Tenth Inning show, the Moustache was saying you can’t blame Baker if veterans aren’t making plays… what is the manager’s job again? Who is running these veterans out the day after day, with the same result? Who knew having your soul crushed could be so exhausting?

  186. LilV Says:

    I gotta agree with those of you who are getting a perverse enjoyment out of this. I am torn between staying home tomorrow and going and booing until I can’t boo anymore.

  187. Dusty Baker Says:

    This is what you guys get for wanting me fired, I’ll play Neifi everyday if I want. **** the Cubs fans. I will just do enough to make this team lose without being to obvious. Muhahahahahahhhaha

  188. Michael Barrett Says:

    Today’s hit list:

    Dusty
    Neifi
    JP
    Dumpster
    Boom Boom Bynum (**** the home run you’re still Dusty’s love child)
    Dusty
    Neifi
    Dusty

  189. This Says:

    is a joke

  190. dcexile Says:

    any self-respecting organization would cut neifi today. THAT’S the way to set an example that lackadaisical play will not be tolerated.

  191. Amusing Says:

    Did the ultimate players manager Dusty Baker let Neifi lead off the 9th just to subject him to more boos?

    That would be the only reason to let a .198 hitter lead off the 9th when facing a one run deficit.

    Right?

  192. More Amusing Says:

    ….was the disgust in Brenly’s voice during the delay in play after Neifi’s double error fiasco.

    Play was halted because Neifi was yelling at the umpire, for reasons unknown.

    Brenly’s reaction: “JUST PLAY THE GAME.” Then silence.

    Pure disgust.

    Classic.

  193. Even More Amusing Says:

    ….there’s 4 more months of fun left!





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