Cubs: Rich Harden 5-1, 1.77 ERA
Dodgers: Hiroki Kuroda  9-10, 3.73 ERA
505 Comments
2008 Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 7:22 pm
This will not end tonight. It’s not elimination day for us. It wouldn’t be fair to anyone that has stood there and followed this team from March until now. There is no way it ends.
Optimism
on October 4, 2008 at 7:52 pm
It’s always darkest before the dawn….right?
Lineups
on October 4, 2008 at 8:19 pm
Cubs
Al Soriano, lf
Little Babe Ruth, 2b
DP Lee, 1b
E-ramis, 3b
Geo, C
Lassie, cf
PonDeRosa, 2b
Dance Fever, ss
Dick Hardon, p
Dodgers
Furcalholic, ss
Russ Martin, c
Manny, lf
Frenchy, rf
Jim Loney, 1b
One of Shawn Kemp’s many illegitimate outfielders, cf
Joyce DeWitt, 2b
Robert Blake, 3b
Long Duck Dong, p
Gordon Wittenmyer
on October 4, 2008 at 8:29 pm
Hah ha! The Cubs had to take Kosuke out of the lineup, see if they’d just kept Jacque they’d be in great shape!
Scott Eyre
on October 4, 2008 at 8:30 pm
I’m making a mess of things in Milwaukee.
Mark Attanasio
on October 4, 2008 at 8:31 pm
If Lou wants to turn things around he should fire Lou today and hire Dale Sveum!
Mark Attanasio
on October 4, 2008 at 8:31 pm
Oops, I’m drunk.
Scott Eyre
on October 4, 2008 at 8:35 pm
Not that the Cubs could get any worse thus far, but just imagine how angry Cubs fans would be if I was still on the team and pitching in the postseason.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 8:39 pm
OK, not only am I here to steer this previously rudderless ship, but I’m going to be drinking heavily throughout the game. I’ll be completely LaRussa’d by the seventh inning and if they happen to lose, I’ll be Hancocked by dawn.
Maureen McGovern
on October 4, 2008 at 8:42 pm
There’s got to be a morning after, if we can hold on through the night. We have a chance to find the sunshine. Let’s keep on looking for the light.
Jan Brady
on October 4, 2008 at 8:43 pm
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!
Oh, wait that would be Maureen McGovern.
Jan Brady
on October 4, 2008 at 8:43 pm
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!
Oh, wait that would be Maureen McMcCormick.
Jan Brady
on October 4, 2008 at 8:44 pm
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!
Oh, wait that would be Maureen McCormick.
Alice
on October 4, 2008 at 8:44 pm
Jan, stop posting hon.
I’d smack you but I’ve got Sam’s meat in my hands.
Maureen McGovern
on October 4, 2008 at 8:45 pm
It’s not too late, not while we’re living!
Let’s put our hands out in time.
Mike Cameron
on October 4, 2008 at 8:45 pm
Since when did I start playing the outfield like I’m wearing skates?
Brewers Fans
on October 4, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Make my ass itch.
Chase Utley
on October 4, 2008 at 8:50 pm
My clutch hitting ability would fit in well with the Cubs.
Six people in America watching Titanic on TNT
on October 4, 2008 at 8:59 pm
What? The ship hit an iceberg and Leo drowned in Dodger Stadium?
Solomon Torres
on October 4, 2008 at 9:00 pm
I never blow three run leads.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:02 pm
Tonight, from Dodger Stadium it’s game three!
Manny Ramirez. Rodrigo Ramirez. Hiduki Kurosawa. Rick Harper!
Tonight on CBS…Fox…TBS…oh, whatever!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:03 pm
Holy crap, Tony Gwynn is a cloudy eye and a bathroom rape away from Kirby Puckett.
He’s always been fat, but this…this is…’uge.
Solomon Torres
on October 4, 2008 at 9:04 pm
Two batters faced. Two hits allowed. I’m awesome.
Solomon Torres
on October 4, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Make that three batters, three hits.
Craig Counsell
on October 4, 2008 at 9:06 pm
I took a nice hit.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:07 pm
You have to admit that the Cubs starting the game by pre-empting a disaster movie is an interesting omen.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:08 pm
One pitch, one out.
Alf
on October 4, 2008 at 9:08 pm
Made contact – that’s a positive.
Mike Fontenot
on October 4, 2008 at 9:09 pm
I’m about to unleash my fury on this postseason.
Milwaukee
on October 4, 2008 at 9:10 pm
At least we’ve got one.
Brewers Fans
on October 4, 2008 at 9:10 pm
We just won the World Series! Whoooooo!
Oh, wait, we’re still down 2-1?
Big Gay Al
on October 4, 2008 at 9:10 pm
I am worthless in the postseason.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:11 pm
I know he’s a drunk, but when you watch Furcal, it reminds you of what it looks like to have a grown up playing shortstop.
Derrek Lee
on October 4, 2008 at 9:11 pm
Double play? How about just a double.
MVLee
on October 4, 2008 at 9:11 pm
One more biscuit…
2 out magic!
on October 4, 2008 at 9:11 pm
Opposite field!
Not Really Chuck
on October 4, 2008 at 9:12 pm
Yeah, so he hit the wall with it. Big deal.
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 9:13 pm
We are going to swing at everything.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:13 pm
The Orphans really need Rodrigo to come up big here against the Trolley Dodgers.
Harry Truman
on October 4, 2008 at 9:14 pm
Kuroda’s from Hiroshima?
Kuroda
on October 4, 2008 at 9:14 pm
Cue up the Hiroshima reference.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:15 pm
Kuroda’s quite the flamethrower. Probably from the home movies of grandma and grandpa running around whilst on fire.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:15 pm
The crowd here at Ebbets Field is the exact opposite of Wrigley Field.
E-ramis
on October 4, 2008 at 9:16 pm
I’m not quite swinging at everything.
Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:16 pm
I am really a douche.
Geo
on October 4, 2008 at 9:16 pm
Now would be a good time for a hit.
Geo
on October 4, 2008 at 9:17 pm
Or, maybe not.
Geo Soto
on October 4, 2008 at 9:17 pm
Out of gas.
pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 9:17 pm
I could really go for some of me right now.
Geo
on October 4, 2008 at 9:17 pm
But you’ll have to settle for an inning-ending ground out.
TNT
on October 4, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Now…back to the Cubs game…er…footage of the Titanic sinking.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Speaking of Titanic, why exactly wasn’t there enough room for both of them on the floating door?
Also, I loved the “I’ll never let go! I’ll never let go! Whoops!” part where she lets him drown. She can’t hang on to him, but she somehow manages to hang onto the $12 million necklace she’s floating around with in her coat pocket.
pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 9:19 pm
I can’t believe I had to walk all the way to first base for nothing.
Andre Ethier
on October 4, 2008 at 9:20 pm
Look at me and tell me I’m not Ron Darling’s illegitimate son.
Dick Harden
on October 4, 2008 at 9:20 pm
To say it might be a big deal to hold the Dodgers scoreless in the first inning might be an understatement.
E-ramis
on October 4, 2008 at 9:20 pm
No errors so far!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Great, Larry had Harden warm up more so his velocity would be better at the start of the game, and Rich will need a nap by the third inning.
Kate Winslett
on October 4, 2008 at 9:21 pm
I weigh twice as much as a sopping wet Leo.
Necklace
on October 4, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Then she dumps me in the water at the end anyway. Oops sorry if I ruined the ending for anyone.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:22 pm
So foul balls are fair now?
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:23 pm
Why does TBS include the #3 hitter in the ‘setting the table’ graphic?
Theriot has great range.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:23 pm
The third base ump is oh for two already.
Pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 9:23 pm
Next time tag his fucking hand.
Horseshit
on October 4, 2008 at 9:24 pm
That 3rd base call was me.
Lou
on October 4, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Will somebody move the mannequin we have at shortstop. Oh, wait it’s Theriot.
Ron Darling Junior
on October 4, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Whiff.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:26 pm
I’m surprised Harden didn’t Dravecky himself on that half-pitch.
Seeing-eye singles
on October 4, 2008 at 9:26 pm
I hate me.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:26 pm
What was Harden looking at? They called time out and then 10 seconds later he starts to pitch.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:26 pm
68 with Theriot and Fontenot in the infield you’re going to be seen a lot.
Ron Darling
on October 4, 2008 at 9:27 pm
I have no idea how many outs there are.
Dodger Stadium
on October 4, 2008 at 9:27 pm
There are actually people batting around a beach ball in the crowd. I thought that was only an MLB: The Show cliche.
I
on October 4, 2008 at 9:27 pm
have to listen to the game on the radio. Long story, but no one is mentioning Harden’s velocity, because they seem not to care about anything important. What is it?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Did Fontenot throw that to home or third? He managed to split the difference.
Harden's velocity
on October 4, 2008 at 9:28 pm
Between 90 and 94, though that shitty slider he just threw was about 85.
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 9:29 pm
Hate to say this, but I would have thrown Manny out.
Dump Truck
on October 4, 2008 at 9:30 pm
I hope I run over James Loney on his way out of the park tonight.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:30 pm
Well, that was a great start.
A double down the line that was foul. Then the runner got thrown out at third but was called safe. Then, Harden almost gets out of the jam, but not quite.
2-0.
Jim Reynolds
on October 4, 2008 at 9:31 pm
I should be fired for the worst call ever at 3rd
Dodger Stadium
on October 4, 2008 at 9:31 pm
The beach balls are actually pretty common around here. Vin Scully has been known to refer to them as “the dreaded” beach balls, and it’s a decent bet one will interrupt play at some point.
1st inning
on October 4, 2008 at 9:32 pm
This is all looking pretty familiar.
Timothy Hutton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:32 pm
I milk my Oscar more than Cuba Gooding Jr.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:32 pm
What are the chances that a beach ball will knock a Cubs homer back onto the field and into Manny’s glove?
78
on October 4, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Which one Jim?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Timothy Hutton won an Oscar for Turk 182?
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Larry Bowa, please die.
MLB.TV between-innings screen
on October 4, 2008 at 9:35 pm
What’s worse, me and dead silence, or TBS commercials? This is a serious question, the silence is unnerving.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
I like how Stockton says, “There’s a good bunt by Theriot” and then Theriot gets thrown out by three steps.
Ryan Theriot
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
That’s the same thing that happens when I try to bunt for a hit with Theriot in MLB: The Show. He gets thrown out by two steps because he’s really not that fast.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Dick Stockton thinks that was a good bunt? I’m frightened to see his idea of a bad bunt.
Fuk U Do Me
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Since I’ve actually faced this guy about 200 times over in Japan perhaps it would have been a good idea to start me tonight.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Kuroda, alert like a cat off the mound… seriously, what the fuck did I just say?
Kuroda early season highlights
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
This is just rubbing it in , isn’t it?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:37 pm
If you’ve seen the Frank TV commercials, you’d be thankful for the creepy silence.
Ryan Theriot
on October 4, 2008 at 9:38 pm
I am scrappy though.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 9:38 pm
Two runs won’t win this fucking game.
Opposite Field
on October 4, 2008 at 9:39 pm
The Cubs hate us in this series.
Not Really Dave B
on October 4, 2008 at 9:39 pm
Don’t make fun of Theriot! He’s scrappy!
MLB.TV between-innings screen
on October 4, 2008 at 9:39 pm
Thanks. I had a feeling FrankTV would be part of the answer. I’ll just beat off between innings to keep myself occupied.
RBI Commercial
on October 4, 2008 at 9:39 pm
Can we see one with Soriano that guest stars his road whores?
Mike D
on October 4, 2008 at 9:40 pm
Brickhouse sucks.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:40 pm
I had the Phillies +2.5 so I’m a little upset at Shane Victorino right now.
Alf
on October 4, 2008 at 9:40 pm
I’m in left field looking at the crowd.
TBS Announce Crew
on October 4, 2008 at 9:40 pm
We are the most irritating of the four.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:41 pm
Jeff Kent shaved off the pornstache. No wonder he’s not playing.
The Ex Cub factor
on October 4, 2008 at 9:42 pm
I guess the current Cub factor outweighs me.
Tony Gwynn hick accent
on October 4, 2008 at 9:42 pm
One never really gets used to me.
Nomar
on October 4, 2008 at 9:42 pm
Before this series ends, I’m going to pull something, even if I have to do it on the bench.
Wait, there goes my groin. Never mind. I’m good.
SAP Channel on my TV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:43 pm
Why can’t I use that to hear Vin versus these three morons?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:43 pm
Jim Frey called TBS and told them he was walking Tony Gwynn to get Steve Garvey into the booth.
SAP button on my TV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:43 pm
Why can’t I use that to hear Vin versus these three morons?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:44 pm
Maybe you can, but you’re just hitting the button twice?
Tony Gwynn
on October 4, 2008 at 9:44 pm
I’m from LA. I played in San Diego. I coach in San Diego. Can someone PLEASE explain my accent?
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 9:44 pm
I got a handjob from somebody named Hibuki Kiburo at a massage parlor last night. I had no idea he pitched for the Dodgers.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:45 pm
So what do Len & Bob do during these games? Sit in Bob’s basement with the TV on mute doing play by play for their wives?
Mike Brito
on October 4, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Good velocity.
Andres Cantor
on October 4, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Maybe you get me with the SAP button? Still an improvement.
Dr. Rosenrosen
on October 4, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Tony, you don’t so much have an accent as an artificially high pitched voice. Your vocal chords are caked with enough cholesterol to fill a bathtub.
Andres Cantor
on October 4, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Martin’s drive down the line is FOUUUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Oh, but it’s called fair! The third base umpire is anally raping the Cubs with a garden rake!
They’re going to be SSSSOOOOOOORRRRRRREEEEEE!!
Harden's 2nd inning
on October 4, 2008 at 9:47 pm
I was better than the first. Still, what are the odds this game ends 2-0?
Craig T Nelson
on October 4, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Based on how my face looks, the botox must have finally taken full effect. Also, who is the midget they dressed up as Carol Ann?
Tony Gwynn
on October 4, 2008 at 9:48 pm
Thanks, Doc. So if I lay off the machaca for a while maybe the kids on my team will stop laughing at me?
Craig T Nelson
on October 4, 2008 at 9:48 pm
I’m still waiting on the call for Action Jackson 2.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:49 pm
Harden’s 2-23 this year, how’d he ever get two?
Robert Wuhl: It’s a miracle.
Dick Harden
on October 4, 2008 at 9:49 pm
Uh, I might have been safe there. Not that TBS would ever think to replay it or the jackasses in the booth even saw the play.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:50 pm
I was going to make fun of Ron Darling for his “scouting report” where he talked about how fast Harden was.
Then, Harden almost beats out a routine grounder to second.
Alf's strikeout highlight reel
on October 4, 2008 at 9:50 pm
I was fun.
Getaway Day
on October 4, 2008 at 9:51 pm
The Cubs are hacking like today is me.
"Some holes" in Alf's swing
on October 4, 2008 at 9:52 pm
I am something of an understatement
Alf
on October 4, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Well, there’s always the big tittied whore back in my room.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Gwynn just diagnosed Soriano’s swing flaw with one replay. Maybe the Cubs should buy Gerald Perry a TV?
Gerald Perry
on October 4, 2008 at 9:53 pm
Hey, I had a .265 career average!
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 9:53 pm
#128, you mean “understudy”?
groundouts
on October 4, 2008 at 9:53 pm
I wish somebody would pop up so Stockton would stop talking about me.
"Some holes" in Alf's swing
on October 4, 2008 at 9:54 pm
132, I stand corrected.
Larry Rothschild
on October 4, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Somebody get Harden a towel!
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Is it normal for a pitcher to warm up in the dugout?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Is Rich Harden pantomiming in the dugout? It’s like a puppet show down there without any puppets.
Pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Odds of me swinging at the first pitch? About 62%.
Mark Prior
on October 4, 2008 at 9:56 pm
I’m using a towel at home right now!
Yes, I’m using it to catch my jenkem while I jerk off to a Clay Aiken video. Why’d you ask?
pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Time for me?
Strike Zone
on October 4, 2008 at 9:57 pm
It’s huuuuuuge! Tiny Elvis look how huuuuuuge this thing is!
Pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 9:57 pm
I’m pretty sure they’re going back to the outside corner here.
4 for 17 with RISP
on October 4, 2008 at 9:57 pm
So I’m an improvement over last year. Wow. Baby steps.
to #129
on October 4, 2008 at 9:57 pm
John Kruk doesn’t count.
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 9:57 pm
We couldn’t score in a women’s prison with a briefcase full of pardons.
Frank TV Commerical
on October 4, 2008 at 10:00 pm
I know this is like talking to the pitcher in the middle of a perfect game, but I don’t think I’ve seen any of me tonight so far.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:00 pm
He’s a physics professor. Same thing.
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:00 pm
Yeah, but we had the most All-Stars this year!
MLB.TV between-innings screen
on October 4, 2008 at 10:00 pm
Damn all of you with your commercial references.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:01 pm
Shit, I think I forgot to change back from TNT and I’ve been watching Titanic for the last 40 minutes.
Nope, wait, it’s the Cubs.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:01 pm
“You can expect another fan explosion!”
4 LOB through 3
on October 4, 2008 at 10:02 pm
That works out to 12 for the game – sounds about right.
Walter Sobchack
on October 4, 2008 at 10:02 pm
Albino’s not the preferred nomeclature 150, it’s pink-eyed American.
Lou
on October 4, 2008 at 10:02 pm
Back in the old days, I’d get thrown out of this game by the fifth inning.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:03 pm
So, the missed strike three call (when Furcal actually thought he’d struck out) turns into a leadoff single. This won’t come back to haunt us.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:03 pm
Yes, that homer by Russell Martin in the 9th inning of game one was, indeed, “huge”.
Bloop
on October 4, 2008 at 10:03 pm
Fuck!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:04 pm
At the least the 2006 Tigers had the good sense to wait until the World Series before they started pulling this shit.
Oh, and Fontenot’s hurt.
Cubs Defense
on October 4, 2008 at 10:04 pm
We’re still lost somewhere in Milwaukee.
RonCe
on October 4, 2008 at 10:04 pm
Here I come to save the day!
Vince Coleman
on October 4, 2008 at 10:05 pm
Did Fontenot get his foot caught in the tarp?
Hey, it happens.
Ron Darling
on October 4, 2008 at 10:05 pm
If you are going to intentionally throw it away down the line, make sure it is to the glove side!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:05 pm
I swear to God, if Ronny Cedeno comes in, I’m throwing a chair through my TV.
Hard hit balls this game
on October 4, 2008 at 10:05 pm
Cubs 3
Dodgers 1
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
We have more errors than runs this series. Is that good?
Mike Fontenot
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
I’m just trying to beat the traffic out of here. I could be back in Louisiana by noon if I get a couple innings head start.
Mike Fontenot
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
I’m cajun, I’m not coming out. I’m also not speaking a discernible language.
RonCe
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
I’m not even dressed.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
This game interrupted Pretty Woman on TNT. I feel like I’ve been cheated.
The correct substitution
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
Reed Johnson in Right, Derosa at 2nd.
167
on October 4, 2008 at 10:06 pm
Gold!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:07 pm
Dick Stockton just said that tomorrow night the Red Sox and Angels will play game four with Boston up two games to none.
Nice.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Walking Martin in front of Manny seems prudent.
Gimpy Fontenot
on October 4, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Yes, leave me in. Let me get to even fewer ground balls.
154
on October 4, 2008 at 10:08 pm
At least your works. My comp is too slow. Stuck with radio
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:09 pm
If you’re going to walk Manny here, save the time and just drill him. Not in the head of course, someplace where he’d feel it.
175
on October 4, 2008 at 10:09 pm
I think you meant “correct starting lineup”
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:09 pm
So what is that colored thing Manny is always sucking on? Or is that just gum?
Harry Doyle
on October 4, 2008 at 10:09 pm
Manny hitting .900 against the Cubs in this series!
Mound conversation
on October 4, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Rich: I’m going to walk Manny and then pick him off first.
Geo: Uh…no.
180
on October 4, 2008 at 10:10 pm
I’d take that over the clowns on TV.
Kimbo Slice
on October 4, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Only I can put up less of a fight than the Cubs.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Manny likes to collect antiques? I’m sure Dick Stockton is available for the right price.
Hey
on October 4, 2008 at 10:10 pm
What’s wrong with the head?
MLB.TV between-innings screen
on October 4, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Thanks 180. You’re right, that is worse.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Good alert baserunning by Manny.
You know, the kind of baserunning that anybody over the age of nine knows how to do.
Mike Fontenot
on October 4, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Apparently, I like the Hugh Jackman Wolverine look.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Read it again 189, there was a joke in there.
188
on October 4, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Post of the day so far
Rich Harden
on October 4, 2008 at 10:13 pm
Actually I didn’t want to pitch to Loney because I knew I’d get him out, but rather we share the same agent and we both have clauses in our contracts with bonuses for being Division Series MVP.
Even though there’s no such award.
Lesley Visser
on October 4, 2008 at 10:14 pm
I told Dick I wouldn’t swallow until I found out that the only thing that comes out of that thing is dust.
DLee
on October 4, 2008 at 10:14 pm
You wouldn’t believe it,but I have the highest batting average on either time this series.
Frank TV commercials
on October 4, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Oh, we’re here.
New scoreboard at Dodger Stadium
on October 4, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Finally replaced that monochrome POS.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:16 pm
151 – you chose….poorly
Trying to pull everything on the outside corner
on October 4, 2008 at 10:16 pm
…never gets old.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Darling noticed that Lou is pacing more in the dugout. It’s only because he’s finally in a dugout that’s big enough to walk around in.
Oof Wah!
on October 4, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Come on Cubs lets get some runs!
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:17 pm
Jesus Christ, we fucking suck.
Geovany
on October 4, 2008 at 10:18 pm
I got a double! Whoooo! Of course, had I done that last time, it’d be tied.
Geo foul ball
on October 4, 2008 at 10:18 pm
I was called fair in the first
Geo
on October 4, 2008 at 10:18 pm
thought I’d switch it up a little.
Lassie
on October 4, 2008 at 10:19 pm
If I follow the lead of the rest of the Cubs this series, I’ll strike out here.
RISP stats
on October 4, 2008 at 10:19 pm
Time to pad me a little bit more.
Lassie
on October 4, 2008 at 10:19 pm
I got him to third to set up his stranding.
Geo Soto
on October 4, 2008 at 10:20 pm
???
Geo Soto
on October 4, 2008 at 10:20 pm
I left it in neutral.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:20 pm
Shitfuck.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:20 pm
You have to love that execution. The Dodgers have the infield back, if you ground to anywhere but third you score a run.
So, DeRosa grounds to third.
Runner on 3rd, less than 2 outs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:21 pm
I never work out for this team.
Soto
on October 4, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Why didn’t I score? Didn’t see the play (no cable TV)
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Hey, remember when Derosa swung at the first pitch against Livan and GIDP in Game 3 last year? That was awesome too.
Ted Lilly
on October 4, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Why didn’t Soto just go home and run over the catcher?
Dick Harden
on October 4, 2008 at 10:21 pm
They might walk me to pitch to Alf.
Matt Murton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:22 pm
Hah! Baserunning at third is hard!
Soto
on October 4, 2008 at 10:22 pm
216– Because I am fat and slow.
Ron
on October 4, 2008 at 10:22 pm
Harden is a good hitter. You know, he swings that bat.
Harden bunt attempt
on October 4, 2008 at 10:23 pm
I was not good
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:24 pm
Shit, Harden’s had a better at bat than DeRosa.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:24 pm
Leadoff doubles are overrated.
Winning a playoff game
on October 4, 2008 at 10:26 pm
So am I, 225.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:26 pm
Harden would have had an easier time concentrating on that at bat if the bases weren’t all clogged up with distracting baserunners.
Dusty Baker
on October 4, 2008 at 10:27 pm
RV, I like the cut of your jib.
Ron
on October 4, 2008 at 10:27 pm
Gosh. Jeeze. I mean why does this always happen to us? What’s going on? Come on.
Dusty Baker
on October 4, 2008 at 10:27 pm
Did somebody say clogged bases, dude?
Lou
on October 4, 2008 at 10:27 pm
I feel like this is a moral victory because we are still in the game.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Vince Vaughn? Yay. Where’s Jim Belushi?
Dickie Harden
on October 4, 2008 at 10:28 pm
If I’d gotten a hit in that situation, I’d probably get the start in right if there’s a Game 4.
Frank Chance
on October 4, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Whoever heard of the Cubs losing a game they had to have?
Tommy Lasorda
on October 4, 2008 at 10:28 pm
I bleed Dodger blue and the whores I hire I pay to shit on my chest.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Jon Lovitz better stop using so much tanning oil. Reiner might mistake him for a honey-glazed turkey.
Pat Hughes
on October 4, 2008 at 10:29 pm
I’m fucking ready for this to be over. I can’t keep Ron from killing himself anymore. Next time he tries, I’m not gonna do anything. Fuck it.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:29 pm
Harden threw that to first at about 110 MPH. At least it was to the glove side.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:29 pm
# 235, I hear Kurt Evans like that kinda shit.
Dave Stewart's Hawks cap
on October 4, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Because when you say “Dave Stewart” I think “hockey!”
Still a nice touch though.
Dugout Facial Expressions
on October 4, 2008 at 10:30 pm
We say it all.
Rob Reiner
on October 4, 2008 at 10:31 pm
I eat it all.
All radio listeners
on October 4, 2008 at 10:32 pm
Do what you gotta do, Pat. We understand.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:33 pm
More retarded face: Ned Coletti or Corey Hart?
Pat Hughes
on October 4, 2008 at 10:33 pm
Thank god I get a break for an inning. Give me that fucking flask, Ron.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:34 pm
Well, if they’re ever going to show a pulse, now seems like a good time. Top of the order coming up.
Andy's Optimism
on October 4, 2008 at 10:35 pm
I’m cute.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:35 pm
Is anyone else worried that Hendry’s solution to this shitty postseason offense will be to sign a couple guys who are ‘clutch playoff hitters’ but otherwise suck at baseball?
Kidd
on October 4, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Need him to throw it off of the middle of Soriano’s bat here.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Fuck you, 247.
Corey Hart
on October 4, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Me. Easy. And you’d need to get that guy from the goonies if you want to give me a challnege.
Alf's Pulse
on October 4, 2008 at 10:37 pm
I do not exist.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:37 pm
Chuck must be dancing with glee in his living room.
CubsLive!
on October 4, 2008 at 10:37 pm
Nice lively board today fellas. Where have we been all year?
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:38 pm
Fontenot shaken up on an era?
248
on October 4, 2008 at 10:38 pm
I hear Mark Lemke’s available
Kidd
on October 4, 2008 at 10:38 pm
How about another 2 out hit here so we can leave another guy on base.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:38 pm
Well 254, they say you don’t appreciate stuff until it’s nearly dead. Or something like that.
TBS Director
on October 4, 2008 at 10:38 pm
Why don’t we just use the blimp cam on any deep flyball?
John Kruk
on October 4, 2008 at 10:39 pm
I’m a camera?
Retarded Face
on October 4, 2008 at 10:39 pm
Hunter Pence.
D Lee
on October 4, 2008 at 10:40 pm
2-1 fastball, I’d rather swing at a 2-2 slider.
Fuck
on October 4, 2008 at 10:40 pm
Nice inning guys.
Outs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:41 pm
12 more of me and you’ll all be out of your misery for the rest of the year.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:41 pm
Well, there’s the obligatory helmet slam to placate the ‘not enough passion’ fans.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:41 pm
Whelp, no pulse there.
Fuck
on October 4, 2008 at 10:41 pm
It still cracks me up that you can write me in the name field but not in the post
Lee
on October 4, 2008 at 10:44 pm
See how I through my bat in disgust, guys? It shows I still care. Just be happy no one was on base.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:44 pm
The Cubs beat the Dodgers 7 out of 9 this year…
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Apparently I know nothing about anything. I said that the Cubs beat the Dodgers 7 of 9 times, but it’s really 5 of 7. I’m a fucking tool.
Hit & Run
on October 4, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Here it comes
Dempster in the middle innings...
on October 4, 2008 at 10:45 pm
WHY?
Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 10:46 pm
“The Cubs were aware the Dodgers lineup was different than earlier in the season.” I am fucking awesome.
Dodgers Bench
on October 4, 2008 at 10:46 pm
We have Andruw, Nomar, Kent, and Pierre? Is this the 2001 All star team?
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:46 pm
Dick Stockton needs to be embalmed already.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:47 pm
He’s already been embalmed, 275. What he needs is a padlock on his coffin.
location
on October 4, 2008 at 10:48 pm
Harden seems to be having a bit of a problem with me.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:48 pm
shit
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:48 pm
Good night everybody!
Manny
on October 4, 2008 at 10:49 pm
I’m the new Bonds.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Oh, speaking of retarded faces…
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:50 pm
Remember how dominant Harden was right after the Cubs got him? That was nice.
Belt-high middle of the plate
on October 4, 2008 at 10:50 pm
Even Fukudome could hit me.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:53 pm
Not to belabor the point, but why not? If we had an adult playing shortstop that’s a double play.
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 10:53 pm
283- Let’s not get carried away. I couldn’t hit water if I fell out of a fucking boat.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:55 pm
The “yellow hammer” I thought was something you had to pay an extra $50 for?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:56 pm
When you’re down 3-0 with four innings to go, you really wish you had the highest scoring offense in the National League.
Oh, wait…
Yellow Hammer
on October 4, 2008 at 10:56 pm
Is that anything like the Velvet Hammer?
Sean Marshall
on October 4, 2008 at 10:56 pm
I am the list of cubs playing up to potentiona this series.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 10:56 pm
Does anyone other than my parents actually watch these TNT original series? My gut tells me no.
Sean Marshall
on October 4, 2008 at 10:57 pm
I didn’t suck.
Ashton Kutcher
on October 4, 2008 at 10:57 pm
Why couldn’t it have been me that died of an “accidental” drug overdose?
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 10:58 pm
One of these innings, we’ll need to score to keep the series alive.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 10:59 pm
Dick had to correct himself when describing where Tom Verducci was, as if we were concerned that Tom was standing on second base.
Jim Belushi
on October 4, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Why couldn’t it have been me that died of an “accidental†drug overdose?
Bases-empty 3-run homers
on October 4, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Is this about the time when Cubs start swinging for me?
The Dodgers
on October 4, 2008 at 11:00 pm
We’re going to rub it in on your shitty Fukudome signing and throw all Asians against you today.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Remember when Aramis hit that grand slam in Game 4 against the Marlins? Me neither.
Dave
on October 4, 2008 at 11:01 pm
What a waste of a season….
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:01 pm
Of course we remember it, the Cubs haven’t won a playoff game since.
John Belushi
on October 4, 2008 at 11:01 pm
Hey, that was no accident!
Opportunities
on October 4, 2008 at 11:02 pm
According to the big Dick, the cubs don’t like taking advantage of me
Geo Soto
on October 4, 2008 at 11:02 pm
now, going in reverse.
Kerry Wood
on October 4, 2008 at 11:02 pm
Let me bat, bitches! I’m good at hitting game-tying homers in post season elimination games.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:03 pm
Ron Darling thinks the Cubs have insulation in their helmets. That might actually explain something.
Body language
on October 4, 2008 at 11:04 pm
If only the Cubs had me they would be winning.
Cubs Fans
on October 4, 2008 at 11:05 pm
What a bunch of filthy masochists we are. If the Cubs actually pulled this shit off and won the world series, what would we have to bitch about and make us miserable?
LoneStarCubFan
on October 4, 2008 at 11:05 pm
Fucking pussies.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:06 pm
I think Verducci’s right. They’re sitting in the wrong part of the dugout. Why don’t they move?
Guh.
A cub fan.
on October 4, 2008 at 11:06 pm
We’re not actually being too negative for the situation. We could be ALOT worse.
Pat & Ron
on October 4, 2008 at 11:07 pm
Turn down that damned Rock ‘n Roll music! Where’s my Johnny Mathis LPs?
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 11:07 pm
The American National League. Nice.
Cub players
on October 4, 2008 at 11:07 pm
Who’s standing in the wrong place, us in the dugout or the blow-dried Ken doll standing on a fucking baseball field?
Bullpen comes alive
on October 4, 2008 at 11:07 pm
We have to hold them at 3…
Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 11:08 pm
Did you know we were the best team in the American National League this year?
Ron
on October 4, 2008 at 11:08 pm
I’m in Lala land and they play the music too loud here.
Sean Marshall
on October 4, 2008 at 11:09 pm
I’m kicking ass. Maybe I should start Game 4.
Florida Marlins
on October 4, 2008 at 11:09 pm
Why don’t you guys just clean house every other year, it has worked for us twice.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:10 pm
So is Whacked Out Sports on next? America’s Funniest Home Videos? Scrubs?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:11 pm
The Cubs are about to be 0-6 in playoff games announced by Dick Stockton. I say we find him and beat him to death. The Bears have a shit record when he announces their games, too, so we’d be doing the whole city a favor.
Lou's Post-Game Press Conference
on October 4, 2008 at 11:11 pm
Anyone else looking forward to the meltdown during me?
Cubs bullpen
on October 4, 2008 at 11:12 pm
I think this is the part of the series where the coach wants to make sure everybody got a chance to play.
Dick Suckton
on October 4, 2008 at 11:12 pm
Where am I?
Sean Marshall
on October 4, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Not a good sign when I’m the only Cub playing well.
Jon Provost
on October 4, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Lassie! You’re gone??!
2
on October 4, 2008 at 11:13 pm
I’m the over-under on hours remaining in this game
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 11:14 pm
To the rescue!
that
on October 4, 2008 at 11:14 pm
was too close for my liking
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:15 pm
Fine, this doesn’t surprise me that TBS would harp on this horseshit.
When Lou got pissed off and yelled at the writer on Thursday that he wasn’t going to “talk about Fukudome anymore” we all know who he was yelling at.
It was fucking Wittenmyer who asks him about Fukudome every fucking day, because Gordon had a hard-on for Jock, since Jock was the only player who would talk to him.
Lou never said he wasn’t going to play Fukudome again, all he said was that he was tired of fucking talking about it.
LoneStarCubFan
on October 4, 2008 at 11:15 pm
Oh, and before I forget, fuck Rafael Furcal with a rusty fucking chainsaw.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:16 pm
There are still 3 goddamn innings left.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:16 pm
I hope Kosuke enjoys his stint in center, because it’s where he’s going to play next year in his platoon with Reed.
Reed Johnson
on October 4, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Where the fuck am I? Did I get sent down to the Arizona Fall League or something?
Sammy Sosa
on October 4, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Would now be a good time for me to remind you guys that I hit .308 with an OPS over 1.300 in my last playoff series?
Buddies?
Ultra-loud music
on October 4, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Do Wah Diddy is for you, Pat & Ron
2003 Marlins
on October 4, 2008 at 11:19 pm
Nobody ever comes back from a 3-0 deficit in the seventh inning or later.
Ever.
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 11:19 pm
We may have set a record in a 3 game series for “most groundballs to the left side”
LoneStarCubFan
on October 4, 2008 at 11:20 pm
For his sake I hope Kosuke does something positive at the plate tonight.
lets go cubs!
on October 4, 2008 at 11:20 pm
bottom of the order needs to step up here
Fuck you, 336
on October 4, 2008 at 11:20 pm
filthy cocksucker
Tony Gwynn
on October 4, 2008 at 11:20 pm
I’m puffy
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 11:21 pm
I’m a nemesis, Ron?
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Isn’t there some sort of saying about good teams taking advantage of errors?
why?
on October 4, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Is there any worse combination you would want up right now than fukudome and soriano?
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Even on that pitch, I was bailing out.
floodgates
on October 4, 2008 at 11:21 pm
That error is about to open me. Right guys? Right? Hello?
@343
on October 4, 2008 at 11:22 pm
Possibly Ramirez and Soto.
Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 11:22 pm
What the fuck am I talking about?
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 11:22 pm
Bitches!!
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Holy shit he can still hit line drives!
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:23 pm
# 340, ya think?
Fukudome
on October 4, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Damn, even though I bailed out, I managed to get a hit.
Home Runs Swings
on October 4, 2008 at 11:24 pm
We’re about to see a bunch of me.
Holy fucking shit
on October 4, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Who saw that coming?
343
on October 4, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Try “Any combination of the eight fucking slapdicks in the line-up”
Winston Wolf
on October 4, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Let’s not all start suckin’ each others dicks quite yet.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:24 pm
And Joe Torre…looks like Lon Chaney from Phantom of the Opera. I just figured that out.
Alfonso Soriano
on October 4, 2008 at 11:25 pm
For a moment I was apparently pitching for the Dodgers.
soriano time
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
time for me to close my eyes and hit the ball hard
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
Oh god. Alf… do something here.
Alf
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
I guess I can work on my hitting in March.
Al
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
That was a good at bat.
Torre
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
When Fukudome gets a hit off of you, you are fucking done. I was out of the dugout before that hit left the infield.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
Nevermind.
soriano time
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
i suck
Ron's advice
on October 4, 2008 at 11:26 pm
You want to get a hit here.
Theriot
on October 4, 2008 at 11:28 pm
Me getting thrown out at third would be a fitting ending.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:28 pm
What were the odds on Theriot not getting thrown out at third?
And why the fuck is Kosuke still on first?
Theriot
on October 4, 2008 at 11:28 pm
I cause heart attacks so I can be stranded closer to home.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:28 pm
It would have been hilariously appropriate for dumbass Theriot to make the 3rd out there.
Alf
on October 4, 2008 at 11:28 pm
That one hit this series is wrecking my shot at a perfect batting average.
Ron Darling
on October 4, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Did I really just say Fukudome felt more at home against a Japanese pitcher?
JSlu Naples
on October 4, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Font lean into that and take it for the team! Rudy Stein!
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:29 pm
fuck
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 11:29 pm
…and that should juusttt about do it.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:32 pm
Yes you did 371, and you also referred to the pitcher as Fukudome. I guess they’re all Fukudomes to you.
Dennis Green
on October 4, 2008 at 11:32 pm
The Dodgers are who we thought they were!
sunday night
on October 4, 2008 at 11:32 pm
looks like i get to watch a crappy football game instead of the cubs now
Fuk U Do Me
on October 4, 2008 at 11:32 pm
At least I got a hit. That’s more than that Domincan piece of shit can do.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Mary Hart is in the front row and I think she’s giving the Cubs seizures.
Brewers
on October 4, 2008 at 11:33 pm
We even won a home game.
379
on October 4, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Are you sure it’s not John Tesh?
378
on October 4, 2008 at 11:34 pm
Funny how it works out that racist dudes aren’t very good spellers.
ManRam
on October 4, 2008 at 11:35 pm
I weighed 120 pounds in that first Indians clip.
Marmol
on October 4, 2008 at 11:36 pm
Can I hit by any chance? Why they fuck not give it a chance?
Ron
on October 4, 2008 at 11:36 pm
Pat, are you trying to make fun of me because I have no post season home runs?
Pat
on October 4, 2008 at 11:37 pm
No Ron, I’m making fun of you because you don’t have any legs.
JSlu Naples
on October 4, 2008 at 11:38 pm
In a span of 4 days, I’ve tried to cheer for Palin, Aramis, Soriano, and Theriot. Tomorrow I got Orton. After this beer I’m going crawl on my roof and piss on the satellite dish.
Further Baby Steps
on October 4, 2008 at 11:38 pm
This inning maybe we’ll strand three and call it progress.
oog
on October 4, 2008 at 11:39 pm
too many comments! ack!
387
on October 4, 2008 at 11:39 pm
Not to get political or anything, but you tried to cheer for Palin? That is true dedication.
Billy Crystal
on October 4, 2008 at 11:40 pm
Nice to know I don’t have any loyalties.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:40 pm
It’s comforting to know that during infuriating times like these, a Ron Santo legs joke can still bring a smile to my ugly mug. Thanks, 386.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 11:41 pm
And it bounces off the wall on a bounce.
Dick Stockton
on October 4, 2008 at 11:41 pm
It bounces off the wall on a bounce.
Pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 11:41 pm
Now, I will hit a ground ball to Casey Blake.
DLEE
on October 4, 2008 at 11:41 pm
I’m crushing the ball today.
DLee
on October 4, 2008 at 11:42 pm
I am a bases-empty hitting machine
Pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 11:43 pm
I am doing the opposite of crushing the ball today.
That pitch to DLee
on October 4, 2008 at 11:43 pm
More of me, please.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:43 pm
Son of a bitch. That hump just hangs a curveball right down the middle and it gets fouled back.
Pancakes
on October 4, 2008 at 11:43 pm
I am swinging as hard as I can.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Well to be fair 397, as Verducci noted, the epic suckage of the top 2 hitters in the Cubs lineup has contributed to said empty bases.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:44 pm
How the fuck do you strike out on a 90 mph fastball right down the fucking middle?
@400
on October 4, 2008 at 11:44 pm
You mean like that first one to Soto?
Ted
on October 4, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Do you like my unabomber look?
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 11:45 pm
Just in case you don’t know – we fucking suck.
402
on October 4, 2008 at 11:45 pm
You’ve taken a very reasonable position here.
Daryle
on October 4, 2008 at 11:46 pm
Here’s my last at-bat as a Cub.
Cubs NLDS fielding highlight reel
on October 4, 2008 at 11:46 pm
I was fun.
Santo
on October 4, 2008 at 11:47 pm
We need a big hit. If we score more than the Dodgers, that’s key. Ward can take it out of the park, that would be nice. What we need is a big hit. That’s the key to this ball game. Oh fuck, I just shit my pants again. Corey!
The Cubs
on October 4, 2008 at 11:47 pm
A run!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:47 pm
Wow. A run. Let’s have a parade.
america for sale
on October 4, 2008 at 11:47 pm
A RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY
JSlu Naples
on October 4, 2008 at 11:48 pm
The Cubs are going to win this game.
Bonertime!
on October 4, 2008 at 11:49 pm
Yes, my standards have dropped a bit.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:49 pm
This apparent rule change allowing the Cubs to get run-scoring hits with two outs opens up all sorts of possibilities.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:49 pm
Who is running for the Fat Kangaroo? Isn’t that why Felix is on the roster?
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:51 pm
Oh shit, it’s Ronny. How will he get picked off? I’m going for the one where he takes way too big of a secondary lead and Martin throws down to get him.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:51 pm
RonCe pinch running. Oh shit.
Ronny
on October 4, 2008 at 11:51 pm
I stole second! Seriously.
america for sale
on October 4, 2008 at 11:51 pm
greatest moment in recent cubs history! I can stop drinking myself to death for a minute!
Ronce
on October 4, 2008 at 11:52 pm
I read #368, so I wanted to do it to.
Lou
on October 4, 2008 at 11:52 pm
I’m waiting to use Pie to pinch run for the tying run in Game 5.
RonCe
on October 4, 2008 at 11:52 pm
Hey! I stole a base!
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:52 pm
That last fastball was only 99.
RV
on October 4, 2008 at 11:52 pm
Does RonCe *ever* slide feet first?
LASSIE
on October 4, 2008 at 11:53 pm
PLAEAS,PLEASE PLEASE JUST ONE MORE DAY :/
Another hanger
on October 4, 2008 at 11:53 pm
fouled off
JSlu Naples
on October 4, 2008 at 11:53 pm
derosa gets a base hit here
RonCe
on October 4, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Well, I had to take myself out of the overslide-second-on-a-walk siutation.
Ron
on October 4, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Broxton is fat.
JSlu Naples
on October 4, 2008 at 11:54 pm
typo
429
on October 4, 2008 at 11:54 pm
Or not.
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:54 pm
I like DeRosa as much as the next guy, but I hope the new owner insists that the team play their utility infielder as a utility infielder next season.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 4, 2008 at 11:55 pm
fuck!
JSlu Naples
on October 4, 2008 at 11:56 pm
we’re going to extra innings
Andy
on October 4, 2008 at 11:57 pm
Cotts? Seriously?
No worries...
on October 4, 2008 at 11:57 pm
In the ninth, it’s Theriot, Fuku & Alf.
Neal Cotts?
on October 4, 2008 at 11:58 pm
What fucking planet am I on?
438
on October 4, 2008 at 11:59 pm
Six months ago I would have been optimistic at that.
Orel Hershiser
on October 4, 2008 at 11:59 pm
I take 4 or 5 showers a day, it’s never made me cry!
Neal Cotts
on October 5, 2008 at 12:01 am
Hey, this is easy!
JSlu Naples
on October 5, 2008 at 12:02 am
we’re going to extra innings…
Relatively painless
on October 5, 2008 at 12:02 am
Somehow, this game has been mean. I suppose I’m just resigned to it at this point.
Neal Cotts
on October 5, 2008 at 12:02 am
I am fucking dominant
Andy
on October 5, 2008 at 12:03 am
Shit, Cotts should have started tonight.
RV
on October 5, 2008 at 12:03 am
OK, Neal Cotts is striking out the side. Anything is possible.
NC
on October 5, 2008 at 12:04 am
Sometimes I even surprise myself.
444
on October 5, 2008 at 12:04 am
Perhaps it’s the lack of multiple-error innings and grand slams that’s got you so chipper today.
JSlu Naples
on October 5, 2008 at 12:06 am
theriot- scraps his way on, ron stilanovich style
Fukkake- very efficient line drive
Fonz- Goes deep, but not deep enough, should leg out triple but he’s admiring and only gets a double
LETS GO
The Cubs
on October 5, 2008 at 12:06 am
It is rather anti-climatic at this point.
The TB Rays
on October 5, 2008 at 12:06 am
Well, we’ve still got them, I guess.
Tinker to Evers to Chance
on October 5, 2008 at 12:06 am
Three-run inning, Ogdens.
This inning.
on October 5, 2008 at 12:06 am
Is the lineup many wanted at 1,2, and 3 at the beginning of the year. Irony.
The Riot
on October 5, 2008 at 12:07 am
Guess I am looking for something other than a pitch right down the middle.
Andy
on October 5, 2008 at 12:07 am
Theriot wouldn’t have tried to bunt on the fat guy or anything.
A Real SS
on October 5, 2008 at 12:07 am
Hendry needs to get one of me for next year or Cubs fans should boycott. Throw in a better RF and non-sucking star LF as well.
RV
on October 5, 2008 at 12:07 am
When will Ron Darling note that Broxton is not Japanese?
Well this postseason was about as enjoyable as a battery acid enema.
Andy
on October 5, 2008 at 12:12 am
You do a nice job, but I dunno if I can stomach watching this baseball team anymore. See you guys next time the Cubs actually do something in the playoffs.
It's been fun
on October 5, 2008 at 12:12 am
See you next year fellas
The Cubs
on October 5, 2008 at 12:12 am
6 runs, 6 errors, 3 games.
Go figure
on October 5, 2008 at 12:12 am
This is the most active gamecast in a while.
Fergie Jenkem
on October 5, 2008 at 12:13 am
Yeah 475. Thanks Andy for having us.
fuck this team
on October 5, 2008 at 12:14 am
fuck next year, fuck tomorrow. this team is atrocious and a giant waste of time. dominat the entire year to be beaten by a one man team playing off that stupid dreadlocked fucks momentum.
fuck the cubs
amen 483
on October 5, 2008 at 12:19 am
fuckin-a
Why
on October 5, 2008 at 12:19 am
Why
Earl Hershiser
on October 5, 2008 at 12:24 am
Ted Lilly is probably the most pissed off person on this team right now. There was no number four in the playoffs better than he was and he doesn’t even get a chance to get out there.
Fuck you, Soriano.
Fuck you, Ramirez.
Lee, not so bad.
DeRosa, fuck your error in game 2, but nice home run.
Fuck you, Soriano.
Fuck you, Soto.
Lassie should have had three home runs.
Fuck you, Fukudome.
Prior and Wood
on October 5, 2008 at 12:24 am
With a healthy me and me going in games six and seven at Wrigley, what could go wrong?
1990s-2000s Braves
on October 5, 2008 at 12:25 am
Are these Cubs us?
The Waterboy
on October 5, 2008 at 12:26 am
Look Ma, the devil just struck out!
487
on October 5, 2008 at 12:30 am
No. The Braves won a World Series and played in a few others.
These last two teams are just a bunch of fucking no-talent chokers who aren’t man enough to handle the postseason.
Irony
on October 5, 2008 at 12:32 am
Favorites around these parts…
Gary Matthews, Jason Kendall, Scott Eyre, Juan Pierre, Nomar Garciaparra, Greg Maddux, Cliff Floyd…
…all still alive in the playoffs.
That and the collective unit of the FUCKING Tampa Bay Rays are still alive.
retracing, maybe it was #155. and maybe it wasn’t you. but, still, keep this site going!
Ivan DeJesus
on October 5, 2008 at 12:45 am
Been a fan for 35 years. Since I first heard them chant ‘Jod-E! Jod-E!’, since I watched a Kingman homer, since I was little and naive enough to think that Reuschel was a great pitcher and that Luzinski should be a hall of famer. Don’t know that I can do it anymore. I’m looking at my Cubs Encyclopedia and realizing that lineup for lineup, this was the team. This was the best hitting, fielding, pitching, relief pitching, and running team they’ve every had. If this team couldn’t do it, it’s NOT gonna happen. So sad, the way they went down. Sadder still, I think I’m really done with them.
Ivan DeJesus
on October 5, 2008 at 12:45 am
Been a fan for 35 years. Since I first heard them chant ‘Jod-E! Jod-E!’, since I watched a Kingman homer, since I was little and naive enough to think that Reuschel was a great pitcher and that Luzinski should be a hall of famer. Don’t know that I can do it anymore. I’m looking at my Cubs Encyclopedia and realizing that lineup for lineup, this was the team. This was the best hitting, fielding, pitching, relief pitching, and running team they’ve every had. If this team couldn’t do it, it’s NOT gonna happen. So sad, the way they went down. Sadder still, I think I’m really done with them.
Lt. Col. Frank Slade
on October 5, 2008 at 12:57 am
If I were the new owner of this team, I’d take a FLAMETHROWER to this organization!
Face It
on October 5, 2008 at 1:01 am
We’ll all be back come spring. five months of winter and we’ll all be roped right back in by the first sight of ivy.
That definitely hurt more. I cried at the end of that game. This time I just expected the Cubs to fuck up, you could just feel it after the Grand Slam in game 1.
Second Guesser
on October 5, 2008 at 1:18 am
Why the hell is no one excoriating Pinella for not pitching Lilly in Game 2??? Z boy, since his no no, double digit ERA. Lilly, since the same day- 14 innings, 2 hits, AND HE DOESN’T EVEN PITCH IN THE EVER L0VING SERIES!!!!!! He would have had 4 days rest. Zambo could’ve easily pitched a game 4. Won’t forgive Lou for this one. But don’t understand why everyone else don’t see it, either…
Countdown
on October 5, 2008 at 1:48 am
Whatever happened to the ‘century of brilliance’ countdown?
This will not end tonight. It’s not elimination day for us. It wouldn’t be fair to anyone that has stood there and followed this team from March until now. There is no way it ends.
It’s always darkest before the dawn….right?
Cubs
Al Soriano, lf
Little Babe Ruth, 2b
DP Lee, 1b
E-ramis, 3b
Geo, C
Lassie, cf
PonDeRosa, 2b
Dance Fever, ss
Dick Hardon, p
Dodgers
Furcalholic, ss
Russ Martin, c
Manny, lf
Frenchy, rf
Jim Loney, 1b
One of Shawn Kemp’s many illegitimate outfielders, cf
Joyce DeWitt, 2b
Robert Blake, 3b
Long Duck Dong, p
Hah ha! The Cubs had to take Kosuke out of the lineup, see if they’d just kept Jacque they’d be in great shape!
I’m making a mess of things in Milwaukee.
If Lou wants to turn things around he should fire Lou today and hire Dale Sveum!
Oops, I’m drunk.
Not that the Cubs could get any worse thus far, but just imagine how angry Cubs fans would be if I was still on the team and pitching in the postseason.
OK, not only am I here to steer this previously rudderless ship, but I’m going to be drinking heavily throughout the game. I’ll be completely LaRussa’d by the seventh inning and if they happen to lose, I’ll be Hancocked by dawn.
There’s got to be a morning after, if we can hold on through the night. We have a chance to find the sunshine. Let’s keep on looking for the light.
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!
Oh, wait that would be Maureen McGovern.
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!
Oh, wait that would be Maureen McMcCormick.
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!
Oh, wait that would be Maureen McCormick.
Jan, stop posting hon.
I’d smack you but I’ve got Sam’s meat in my hands.
It’s not too late, not while we’re living!
Let’s put our hands out in time.
Since when did I start playing the outfield like I’m wearing skates?
Make my ass itch.
My clutch hitting ability would fit in well with the Cubs.
What? The ship hit an iceberg and Leo drowned in Dodger Stadium?
I never blow three run leads.
Tonight, from Dodger Stadium it’s game three!
Manny Ramirez. Rodrigo Ramirez. Hiduki Kurosawa. Rick Harper!
Tonight on CBS…Fox…TBS…oh, whatever!
Holy crap, Tony Gwynn is a cloudy eye and a bathroom rape away from Kirby Puckett.
He’s always been fat, but this…this is…’uge.
Two batters faced. Two hits allowed. I’m awesome.
Make that three batters, three hits.
I took a nice hit.
You have to admit that the Cubs starting the game by pre-empting a disaster movie is an interesting omen.
One pitch, one out.
Made contact – that’s a positive.
I’m about to unleash my fury on this postseason.
At least we’ve got one.
We just won the World Series! Whoooooo!
Oh, wait, we’re still down 2-1?
I am worthless in the postseason.
I know he’s a drunk, but when you watch Furcal, it reminds you of what it looks like to have a grown up playing shortstop.
Double play? How about just a double.
One more biscuit…
Opposite field!
Yeah, so he hit the wall with it. Big deal.
We are going to swing at everything.
The Orphans really need Rodrigo to come up big here against the Trolley Dodgers.
Kuroda’s from Hiroshima?
Cue up the Hiroshima reference.
Kuroda’s quite the flamethrower. Probably from the home movies of grandma and grandpa running around whilst on fire.
The crowd here at Ebbets Field is the exact opposite of Wrigley Field.
I’m not quite swinging at everything.
I am really a douche.
Now would be a good time for a hit.
Or, maybe not.
Out of gas.
I could really go for some of me right now.
But you’ll have to settle for an inning-ending ground out.
Now…back to the Cubs game…er…footage of the Titanic sinking.
Speaking of Titanic, why exactly wasn’t there enough room for both of them on the floating door?
Also, I loved the “I’ll never let go! I’ll never let go! Whoops!” part where she lets him drown. She can’t hang on to him, but she somehow manages to hang onto the $12 million necklace she’s floating around with in her coat pocket.
I can’t believe I had to walk all the way to first base for nothing.
Look at me and tell me I’m not Ron Darling’s illegitimate son.
To say it might be a big deal to hold the Dodgers scoreless in the first inning might be an understatement.
No errors so far!
Great, Larry had Harden warm up more so his velocity would be better at the start of the game, and Rich will need a nap by the third inning.
I weigh twice as much as a sopping wet Leo.
Then she dumps me in the water at the end anyway. Oops sorry if I ruined the ending for anyone.
So foul balls are fair now?
Why does TBS include the #3 hitter in the ‘setting the table’ graphic?
Theriot has great range.
The third base ump is oh for two already.
Next time tag his fucking hand.
That 3rd base call was me.
Will somebody move the mannequin we have at shortstop. Oh, wait it’s Theriot.
Whiff.
I’m surprised Harden didn’t Dravecky himself on that half-pitch.
I hate me.
What was Harden looking at? They called time out and then 10 seconds later he starts to pitch.
68 with Theriot and Fontenot in the infield you’re going to be seen a lot.
I have no idea how many outs there are.
There are actually people batting around a beach ball in the crowd. I thought that was only an MLB: The Show cliche.
have to listen to the game on the radio. Long story, but no one is mentioning Harden’s velocity, because they seem not to care about anything important. What is it?
Did Fontenot throw that to home or third? He managed to split the difference.
Between 90 and 94, though that shitty slider he just threw was about 85.
Hate to say this, but I would have thrown Manny out.
I hope I run over James Loney on his way out of the park tonight.
Well, that was a great start.
A double down the line that was foul. Then the runner got thrown out at third but was called safe. Then, Harden almost gets out of the jam, but not quite.
2-0.
I should be fired for the worst call ever at 3rd
The beach balls are actually pretty common around here. Vin Scully has been known to refer to them as “the dreaded” beach balls, and it’s a decent bet one will interrupt play at some point.
This is all looking pretty familiar.
I milk my Oscar more than Cuba Gooding Jr.
What are the chances that a beach ball will knock a Cubs homer back onto the field and into Manny’s glove?
Which one Jim?
Timothy Hutton won an Oscar for Turk 182?
Larry Bowa, please die.
What’s worse, me and dead silence, or TBS commercials? This is a serious question, the silence is unnerving.
I like how Stockton says, “There’s a good bunt by Theriot” and then Theriot gets thrown out by three steps.
That’s the same thing that happens when I try to bunt for a hit with Theriot in MLB: The Show. He gets thrown out by two steps because he’s really not that fast.
Dick Stockton thinks that was a good bunt? I’m frightened to see his idea of a bad bunt.
Since I’ve actually faced this guy about 200 times over in Japan perhaps it would have been a good idea to start me tonight.
Kuroda, alert like a cat off the mound… seriously, what the fuck did I just say?
This is just rubbing it in , isn’t it?
If you’ve seen the Frank TV commercials, you’d be thankful for the creepy silence.
I am scrappy though.
Two runs won’t win this fucking game.
The Cubs hate us in this series.
Don’t make fun of Theriot! He’s scrappy!
Thanks. I had a feeling FrankTV would be part of the answer. I’ll just beat off between innings to keep myself occupied.
Can we see one with Soriano that guest stars his road whores?
Brickhouse sucks.
I had the Phillies +2.5 so I’m a little upset at Shane Victorino right now.
I’m in left field looking at the crowd.
We are the most irritating of the four.
Jeff Kent shaved off the pornstache. No wonder he’s not playing.
I guess the current Cub factor outweighs me.
One never really gets used to me.
Before this series ends, I’m going to pull something, even if I have to do it on the bench.
Wait, there goes my groin. Never mind. I’m good.
Why can’t I use that to hear Vin versus these three morons?
Jim Frey called TBS and told them he was walking Tony Gwynn to get Steve Garvey into the booth.
Why can’t I use that to hear Vin versus these three morons?
Maybe you can, but you’re just hitting the button twice?
I’m from LA. I played in San Diego. I coach in San Diego. Can someone PLEASE explain my accent?
I got a handjob from somebody named Hibuki Kiburo at a massage parlor last night. I had no idea he pitched for the Dodgers.
So what do Len & Bob do during these games? Sit in Bob’s basement with the TV on mute doing play by play for their wives?
Good velocity.
Maybe you get me with the SAP button? Still an improvement.
Tony, you don’t so much have an accent as an artificially high pitched voice. Your vocal chords are caked with enough cholesterol to fill a bathtub.
Martin’s drive down the line is FOUUUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Oh, but it’s called fair! The third base umpire is anally raping the Cubs with a garden rake!
They’re going to be SSSSOOOOOOORRRRRRREEEEEE!!
I was better than the first. Still, what are the odds this game ends 2-0?
Based on how my face looks, the botox must have finally taken full effect. Also, who is the midget they dressed up as Carol Ann?
Thanks, Doc. So if I lay off the machaca for a while maybe the kids on my team will stop laughing at me?
I’m still waiting on the call for Action Jackson 2.
Harden’s 2-23 this year, how’d he ever get two?
Robert Wuhl: It’s a miracle.
Uh, I might have been safe there. Not that TBS would ever think to replay it or the jackasses in the booth even saw the play.
I was going to make fun of Ron Darling for his “scouting report” where he talked about how fast Harden was.
Then, Harden almost beats out a routine grounder to second.
I was fun.
The Cubs are hacking like today is me.
I am something of an understatement
Well, there’s always the big tittied whore back in my room.
Gwynn just diagnosed Soriano’s swing flaw with one replay. Maybe the Cubs should buy Gerald Perry a TV?
Hey, I had a .265 career average!
#128, you mean “understudy”?
I wish somebody would pop up so Stockton would stop talking about me.
132, I stand corrected.
Somebody get Harden a towel!
Is it normal for a pitcher to warm up in the dugout?
Is Rich Harden pantomiming in the dugout? It’s like a puppet show down there without any puppets.
Odds of me swinging at the first pitch? About 62%.
I’m using a towel at home right now!
Yes, I’m using it to catch my jenkem while I jerk off to a Clay Aiken video. Why’d you ask?
Time for me?
It’s huuuuuuge! Tiny Elvis look how huuuuuuge this thing is!
I’m pretty sure they’re going back to the outside corner here.
So I’m an improvement over last year. Wow. Baby steps.
John Kruk doesn’t count.
We couldn’t score in a women’s prison with a briefcase full of pardons.
Fuck.
sorry I’m late.
That’s OK – we’ll get ’em tomorrow!
Four for 17? How’d we ever get four?
Is that guy an albino?
I know this is like talking to the pitcher in the middle of a perfect game, but I don’t think I’ve seen any of me tonight so far.
He’s a physics professor. Same thing.
Yeah, but we had the most All-Stars this year!
Damn all of you with your commercial references.
Shit, I think I forgot to change back from TNT and I’ve been watching Titanic for the last 40 minutes.
Nope, wait, it’s the Cubs.
“You can expect another fan explosion!”
That works out to 12 for the game – sounds about right.
Albino’s not the preferred nomeclature 150, it’s pink-eyed American.
Back in the old days, I’d get thrown out of this game by the fifth inning.
So, the missed strike three call (when Furcal actually thought he’d struck out) turns into a leadoff single. This won’t come back to haunt us.
Yes, that homer by Russell Martin in the 9th inning of game one was, indeed, “huge”.
Fuck!
At the least the 2006 Tigers had the good sense to wait until the World Series before they started pulling this shit.
Oh, and Fontenot’s hurt.
We’re still lost somewhere in Milwaukee.
Here I come to save the day!
Did Fontenot get his foot caught in the tarp?
Hey, it happens.
If you are going to intentionally throw it away down the line, make sure it is to the glove side!
I swear to God, if Ronny Cedeno comes in, I’m throwing a chair through my TV.
Cubs 3
Dodgers 1
We have more errors than runs this series. Is that good?
I’m just trying to beat the traffic out of here. I could be back in Louisiana by noon if I get a couple innings head start.
I’m cajun, I’m not coming out. I’m also not speaking a discernible language.
I’m not even dressed.
This game interrupted Pretty Woman on TNT. I feel like I’ve been cheated.
Reed Johnson in Right, Derosa at 2nd.
Gold!
Dick Stockton just said that tomorrow night the Red Sox and Angels will play game four with Boston up two games to none.
Nice.
Walking Martin in front of Manny seems prudent.
Yes, leave me in. Let me get to even fewer ground balls.
At least your works. My comp is too slow. Stuck with radio
If you’re going to walk Manny here, save the time and just drill him. Not in the head of course, someplace where he’d feel it.
I think you meant “correct starting lineup”
So what is that colored thing Manny is always sucking on? Or is that just gum?
Manny hitting .900 against the Cubs in this series!
Rich: I’m going to walk Manny and then pick him off first.
Geo: Uh…no.
I’d take that over the clowns on TV.
Only I can put up less of a fight than the Cubs.
Manny likes to collect antiques? I’m sure Dick Stockton is available for the right price.
What’s wrong with the head?
Thanks 180. You’re right, that is worse.
Good alert baserunning by Manny.
You know, the kind of baserunning that anybody over the age of nine knows how to do.
Apparently, I like the Hugh Jackman Wolverine look.
Read it again 189, there was a joke in there.
Post of the day so far
Actually I didn’t want to pitch to Loney because I knew I’d get him out, but rather we share the same agent and we both have clauses in our contracts with bonuses for being Division Series MVP.
Even though there’s no such award.
I told Dick I wouldn’t swallow until I found out that the only thing that comes out of that thing is dust.
You wouldn’t believe it,but I have the highest batting average on either time this series.
Oh, we’re here.
Finally replaced that monochrome POS.
151 – you chose….poorly
…never gets old.
Darling noticed that Lou is pacing more in the dugout. It’s only because he’s finally in a dugout that’s big enough to walk around in.
Come on Cubs lets get some runs!
Jesus Christ, we fucking suck.
I got a double! Whoooo! Of course, had I done that last time, it’d be tied.
I was called fair in the first
thought I’d switch it up a little.
If I follow the lead of the rest of the Cubs this series, I’ll strike out here.
Time to pad me a little bit more.
I got him to third to set up his stranding.
???
I left it in neutral.
Shitfuck.
You have to love that execution. The Dodgers have the infield back, if you ground to anywhere but third you score a run.
So, DeRosa grounds to third.
I never work out for this team.
Why didn’t I score? Didn’t see the play (no cable TV)
Hey, remember when Derosa swung at the first pitch against Livan and GIDP in Game 3 last year? That was awesome too.
Why didn’t Soto just go home and run over the catcher?
They might walk me to pitch to Alf.
Hah! Baserunning at third is hard!
216– Because I am fat and slow.
Harden is a good hitter. You know, he swings that bat.
I was not good
Shit, Harden’s had a better at bat than DeRosa.
Leadoff doubles are overrated.
So am I, 225.
Harden would have had an easier time concentrating on that at bat if the bases weren’t all clogged up with distracting baserunners.
RV, I like the cut of your jib.
Gosh. Jeeze. I mean why does this always happen to us? What’s going on? Come on.
Did somebody say clogged bases, dude?
I feel like this is a moral victory because we are still in the game.
Vince Vaughn? Yay. Where’s Jim Belushi?
If I’d gotten a hit in that situation, I’d probably get the start in right if there’s a Game 4.
Whoever heard of the Cubs losing a game they had to have?
I bleed Dodger blue and the whores I hire I pay to shit on my chest.
Jon Lovitz better stop using so much tanning oil. Reiner might mistake him for a honey-glazed turkey.
I’m fucking ready for this to be over. I can’t keep Ron from killing himself anymore. Next time he tries, I’m not gonna do anything. Fuck it.
Harden threw that to first at about 110 MPH. At least it was to the glove side.
# 235, I hear Kurt Evans like that kinda shit.
Because when you say “Dave Stewart” I think “hockey!”
Still a nice touch though.
We say it all.
I eat it all.
Do what you gotta do, Pat. We understand.
More retarded face: Ned Coletti or Corey Hart?
Thank god I get a break for an inning. Give me that fucking flask, Ron.
Well, if they’re ever going to show a pulse, now seems like a good time. Top of the order coming up.
I’m cute.
Is anyone else worried that Hendry’s solution to this shitty postseason offense will be to sign a couple guys who are ‘clutch playoff hitters’ but otherwise suck at baseball?
Need him to throw it off of the middle of Soriano’s bat here.
Fuck you, 247.
Me. Easy. And you’d need to get that guy from the goonies if you want to give me a challnege.
I do not exist.
Chuck must be dancing with glee in his living room.
Nice lively board today fellas. Where have we been all year?
Fontenot shaken up on an era?
I hear Mark Lemke’s available
How about another 2 out hit here so we can leave another guy on base.
Well 254, they say you don’t appreciate stuff until it’s nearly dead. Or something like that.
Why don’t we just use the blimp cam on any deep flyball?
I’m a camera?
Hunter Pence.
2-1 fastball, I’d rather swing at a 2-2 slider.
Nice inning guys.
12 more of me and you’ll all be out of your misery for the rest of the year.
Well, there’s the obligatory helmet slam to placate the ‘not enough passion’ fans.
Whelp, no pulse there.
It still cracks me up that you can write me in the name field but not in the post
See how I through my bat in disgust, guys? It shows I still care. Just be happy no one was on base.
The Cubs beat the Dodgers 7 out of 9 this year…
Apparently I know nothing about anything. I said that the Cubs beat the Dodgers 7 of 9 times, but it’s really 5 of 7. I’m a fucking tool.
Here it comes
WHY?
“The Cubs were aware the Dodgers lineup was different than earlier in the season.” I am fucking awesome.
We have Andruw, Nomar, Kent, and Pierre? Is this the 2001 All star team?
Dick Stockton needs to be embalmed already.
He’s already been embalmed, 275. What he needs is a padlock on his coffin.
Harden seems to be having a bit of a problem with me.
shit
Good night everybody!
I’m the new Bonds.
Oh, speaking of retarded faces…
Remember how dominant Harden was right after the Cubs got him? That was nice.
Even Fukudome could hit me.
Not to belabor the point, but why not? If we had an adult playing shortstop that’s a double play.
283- Let’s not get carried away. I couldn’t hit water if I fell out of a fucking boat.
The “yellow hammer” I thought was something you had to pay an extra $50 for?
When you’re down 3-0 with four innings to go, you really wish you had the highest scoring offense in the National League.
Oh, wait…
Is that anything like the Velvet Hammer?
I am the list of cubs playing up to potentiona this series.
Does anyone other than my parents actually watch these TNT original series? My gut tells me no.
I didn’t suck.
Why couldn’t it have been me that died of an “accidental” drug overdose?
One of these innings, we’ll need to score to keep the series alive.
Dick had to correct himself when describing where Tom Verducci was, as if we were concerned that Tom was standing on second base.
Why couldn’t it have been me that died of an “accidental†drug overdose?
Is this about the time when Cubs start swinging for me?
We’re going to rub it in on your shitty Fukudome signing and throw all Asians against you today.
Remember when Aramis hit that grand slam in Game 4 against the Marlins? Me neither.
What a waste of a season….
Of course we remember it, the Cubs haven’t won a playoff game since.
Hey, that was no accident!
According to the big Dick, the cubs don’t like taking advantage of me
now, going in reverse.
Let me bat, bitches! I’m good at hitting game-tying homers in post season elimination games.
Ron Darling thinks the Cubs have insulation in their helmets. That might actually explain something.
If only the Cubs had me they would be winning.
What a bunch of filthy masochists we are. If the Cubs actually pulled this shit off and won the world series, what would we have to bitch about and make us miserable?
Fucking pussies.
I think Verducci’s right. They’re sitting in the wrong part of the dugout. Why don’t they move?
Guh.
We’re not actually being too negative for the situation. We could be ALOT worse.
Turn down that damned Rock ‘n Roll music! Where’s my Johnny Mathis LPs?
The American National League. Nice.
Who’s standing in the wrong place, us in the dugout or the blow-dried Ken doll standing on a fucking baseball field?
We have to hold them at 3…
Did you know we were the best team in the American National League this year?
I’m in Lala land and they play the music too loud here.
I’m kicking ass. Maybe I should start Game 4.
Why don’t you guys just clean house every other year, it has worked for us twice.
So is Whacked Out Sports on next? America’s Funniest Home Videos? Scrubs?
The Cubs are about to be 0-6 in playoff games announced by Dick Stockton. I say we find him and beat him to death. The Bears have a shit record when he announces their games, too, so we’d be doing the whole city a favor.
Anyone else looking forward to the meltdown during me?
I think this is the part of the series where the coach wants to make sure everybody got a chance to play.
Where am I?
Not a good sign when I’m the only Cub playing well.
Lassie! You’re gone??!
I’m the over-under on hours remaining in this game
To the rescue!
was too close for my liking
Fine, this doesn’t surprise me that TBS would harp on this horseshit.
When Lou got pissed off and yelled at the writer on Thursday that he wasn’t going to “talk about Fukudome anymore” we all know who he was yelling at.
It was fucking Wittenmyer who asks him about Fukudome every fucking day, because Gordon had a hard-on for Jock, since Jock was the only player who would talk to him.
Lou never said he wasn’t going to play Fukudome again, all he said was that he was tired of fucking talking about it.
Oh, and before I forget, fuck Rafael Furcal with a rusty fucking chainsaw.
There are still 3 goddamn innings left.
I hope Kosuke enjoys his stint in center, because it’s where he’s going to play next year in his platoon with Reed.
Where the fuck am I? Did I get sent down to the Arizona Fall League or something?
Would now be a good time for me to remind you guys that I hit .308 with an OPS over 1.300 in my last playoff series?
Buddies?
Do Wah Diddy is for you, Pat & Ron
Nobody ever comes back from a 3-0 deficit in the seventh inning or later.
Ever.
We may have set a record in a 3 game series for “most groundballs to the left side”
For his sake I hope Kosuke does something positive at the plate tonight.
bottom of the order needs to step up here
filthy cocksucker
I’m puffy
I’m a nemesis, Ron?
Isn’t there some sort of saying about good teams taking advantage of errors?
Is there any worse combination you would want up right now than fukudome and soriano?
Even on that pitch, I was bailing out.
That error is about to open me. Right guys? Right? Hello?
Possibly Ramirez and Soto.
What the fuck am I talking about?
Bitches!!
Holy shit he can still hit line drives!
# 340, ya think?
Damn, even though I bailed out, I managed to get a hit.
We’re about to see a bunch of me.
Who saw that coming?
Try “Any combination of the eight fucking slapdicks in the line-up”
Let’s not all start suckin’ each others dicks quite yet.
And Joe Torre…looks like Lon Chaney from Phantom of the Opera. I just figured that out.
For a moment I was apparently pitching for the Dodgers.
time for me to close my eyes and hit the ball hard
Oh god. Alf… do something here.
I guess I can work on my hitting in March.
That was a good at bat.
When Fukudome gets a hit off of you, you are fucking done. I was out of the dugout before that hit left the infield.
Nevermind.
i suck
You want to get a hit here.
Me getting thrown out at third would be a fitting ending.
What were the odds on Theriot not getting thrown out at third?
And why the fuck is Kosuke still on first?
I cause heart attacks so I can be stranded closer to home.
It would have been hilariously appropriate for dumbass Theriot to make the 3rd out there.
That one hit this series is wrecking my shot at a perfect batting average.
Did I really just say Fukudome felt more at home against a Japanese pitcher?
Font lean into that and take it for the team! Rudy Stein!
fuck
…and that should juusttt about do it.
Yes you did 371, and you also referred to the pitcher as Fukudome. I guess they’re all Fukudomes to you.
The Dodgers are who we thought they were!
looks like i get to watch a crappy football game instead of the cubs now
At least I got a hit. That’s more than that Domincan piece of shit can do.
Mary Hart is in the front row and I think she’s giving the Cubs seizures.
We even won a home game.
Are you sure it’s not John Tesh?
Funny how it works out that racist dudes aren’t very good spellers.
I weighed 120 pounds in that first Indians clip.
Can I hit by any chance? Why they fuck not give it a chance?
Pat, are you trying to make fun of me because I have no post season home runs?
No Ron, I’m making fun of you because you don’t have any legs.
In a span of 4 days, I’ve tried to cheer for Palin, Aramis, Soriano, and Theriot. Tomorrow I got Orton. After this beer I’m going crawl on my roof and piss on the satellite dish.
This inning maybe we’ll strand three and call it progress.
too many comments! ack!
Not to get political or anything, but you tried to cheer for Palin? That is true dedication.
Nice to know I don’t have any loyalties.
It’s comforting to know that during infuriating times like these, a Ron Santo legs joke can still bring a smile to my ugly mug. Thanks, 386.
And it bounces off the wall on a bounce.
It bounces off the wall on a bounce.
Now, I will hit a ground ball to Casey Blake.
I’m crushing the ball today.
I am a bases-empty hitting machine
I am doing the opposite of crushing the ball today.
More of me, please.
Son of a bitch. That hump just hangs a curveball right down the middle and it gets fouled back.
I am swinging as hard as I can.
Well to be fair 397, as Verducci noted, the epic suckage of the top 2 hitters in the Cubs lineup has contributed to said empty bases.
How the fuck do you strike out on a 90 mph fastball right down the fucking middle?
You mean like that first one to Soto?
Do you like my unabomber look?
Just in case you don’t know – we fucking suck.
You’ve taken a very reasonable position here.
Here’s my last at-bat as a Cub.
I was fun.
We need a big hit. If we score more than the Dodgers, that’s key. Ward can take it out of the park, that would be nice. What we need is a big hit. That’s the key to this ball game. Oh fuck, I just shit my pants again. Corey!
A run!
Wow. A run. Let’s have a parade.
A RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY
The Cubs are going to win this game.
Yes, my standards have dropped a bit.
This apparent rule change allowing the Cubs to get run-scoring hits with two outs opens up all sorts of possibilities.
Who is running for the Fat Kangaroo? Isn’t that why Felix is on the roster?
Oh shit, it’s Ronny. How will he get picked off? I’m going for the one where he takes way too big of a secondary lead and Martin throws down to get him.
RonCe pinch running. Oh shit.
I stole second! Seriously.
greatest moment in recent cubs history! I can stop drinking myself to death for a minute!
I read #368, so I wanted to do it to.
I’m waiting to use Pie to pinch run for the tying run in Game 5.
Hey! I stole a base!
That last fastball was only 99.
Does RonCe *ever* slide feet first?
PLAEAS,PLEASE PLEASE JUST ONE MORE DAY :/
fouled off
derosa gets a base hit here
Well, I had to take myself out of the overslide-second-on-a-walk siutation.
Broxton is fat.
typo
Or not.
I like DeRosa as much as the next guy, but I hope the new owner insists that the team play their utility infielder as a utility infielder next season.
fuck!
we’re going to extra innings
Cotts? Seriously?
In the ninth, it’s Theriot, Fuku & Alf.
What fucking planet am I on?
Six months ago I would have been optimistic at that.
I take 4 or 5 showers a day, it’s never made me cry!
Hey, this is easy!
we’re going to extra innings…
Somehow, this game has been mean. I suppose I’m just resigned to it at this point.
I am fucking dominant
Shit, Cotts should have started tonight.
OK, Neal Cotts is striking out the side. Anything is possible.
Sometimes I even surprise myself.
Perhaps it’s the lack of multiple-error innings and grand slams that’s got you so chipper today.
theriot- scraps his way on, ron stilanovich style
Fukkake- very efficient line drive
Fonz- Goes deep, but not deep enough, should leg out triple but he’s admiring and only gets a double
LETS GO
It is rather anti-climatic at this point.
Well, we’ve still got them, I guess.
Three-run inning, Ogdens.
Is the lineup many wanted at 1,2, and 3 at the beginning of the year. Irony.
Guess I am looking for something other than a pitch right down the middle.
Theriot wouldn’t have tried to bunt on the fat guy or anything.
Hendry needs to get one of me for next year or Cubs fans should boycott. Throw in a better RF and non-sucking star LF as well.
When will Ron Darling note that Broxton is not Japanese?
A spinning strikeout would be fitting…
456 posts? All in fun, n0?
Well, at least he won’t strike out the side on nine pitches now.
Yeah, nine in a row is reserved for post season losses.
Fukudome is clearly uncomfortable against this white guy.
Go fuck yourself.
Waste of 6 months.
Pat has his sad voice on.
Because I would bet everything I own on a K right here.
Great swing, Adolpho.
And that, is that.
38 years i’m done
I am unfuckingbelieveably bad.
Fuck me, I am worthless as shit.
What a complete and utter waste of six months.
How appropriate. Alf strikes out.
Thanks for doing this again…we’ll see you next year – or in the unlikely event of a Bears playoff game.
AC0063100
Well this postseason was about as enjoyable as a battery acid enema.
You do a nice job, but I dunno if I can stomach watching this baseball team anymore. See you guys next time the Cubs actually do something in the playoffs.
See you next year fellas
6 runs, 6 errors, 3 games.
This is the most active gamecast in a while.
Yeah 475. Thanks Andy for having us.
fuck next year, fuck tomorrow. this team is atrocious and a giant waste of time. dominat the entire year to be beaten by a one man team playing off that stupid dreadlocked fucks momentum.
fuck the cubs
fuckin-a
Why
Ted Lilly is probably the most pissed off person on this team right now. There was no number four in the playoffs better than he was and he doesn’t even get a chance to get out there.
Fuck you, Soriano.
Fuck you, Ramirez.
Lee, not so bad.
DeRosa, fuck your error in game 2, but nice home run.
Fuck you, Soriano.
Fuck you, Soto.
Lassie should have had three home runs.
Fuck you, Fukudome.
With a healthy me and me going in games six and seven at Wrigley, what could go wrong?
Are these Cubs us?
Look Ma, the devil just struck out!
No. The Braves won a World Series and played in a few others.
These last two teams are just a bunch of fucking no-talent chokers who aren’t man enough to handle the postseason.
Favorites around these parts…
Gary Matthews, Jason Kendall, Scott Eyre, Juan Pierre, Nomar Garciaparra, Greg Maddux, Cliff Floyd…
…all still alive in the playoffs.
That and the collective unit of the FUCKING Tampa Bay Rays are still alive.
The Titanic line was the best tonight (#52).
Anyway, I appreciate your humor Andy. Keep it up for at least one more year.
retracing, maybe it was #155. and maybe it wasn’t you. but, still, keep this site going!
Been a fan for 35 years. Since I first heard them chant ‘Jod-E! Jod-E!’, since I watched a Kingman homer, since I was little and naive enough to think that Reuschel was a great pitcher and that Luzinski should be a hall of famer. Don’t know that I can do it anymore. I’m looking at my Cubs Encyclopedia and realizing that lineup for lineup, this was the team. This was the best hitting, fielding, pitching, relief pitching, and running team they’ve every had. If this team couldn’t do it, it’s NOT gonna happen. So sad, the way they went down. Sadder still, I think I’m really done with them.
Been a fan for 35 years. Since I first heard them chant ‘Jod-E! Jod-E!’, since I watched a Kingman homer, since I was little and naive enough to think that Reuschel was a great pitcher and that Luzinski should be a hall of famer. Don’t know that I can do it anymore. I’m looking at my Cubs Encyclopedia and realizing that lineup for lineup, this was the team. This was the best hitting, fielding, pitching, relief pitching, and running team they’ve every had. If this team couldn’t do it, it’s NOT gonna happen. So sad, the way they went down. Sadder still, I think I’m really done with them.
If I were the new owner of this team, I’d take a FLAMETHROWER to this organization!
We’ll all be back come spring. five months of winter and we’ll all be roped right back in by the first sight of ivy.
Ya!
http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/ps/y2003/wrapup.jsp?ymd=20031014&content_id=578934&vkey=ps2003wrapup&fext=.jsp
I still think this hurt more.
That definitely hurt more. I cried at the end of that game. This time I just expected the Cubs to fuck up, you could just feel it after the Grand Slam in game 1.
Why the hell is no one excoriating Pinella for not pitching Lilly in Game 2??? Z boy, since his no no, double digit ERA. Lilly, since the same day- 14 innings, 2 hits, AND HE DOESN’T EVEN PITCH IN THE EVER L0VING SERIES!!!!!! He would have had 4 days rest. Zambo could’ve easily pitched a game 4. Won’t forgive Lou for this one. But don’t understand why everyone else don’t see it, either…
Whatever happened to the ‘century of brilliance’ countdown?
uhhhh, HELLO ??