At a hastily thrown together press conference in the left field women’s bathroom at Wrigley Field that Todd Ricketts has dubbed “The Throne Room” the assembled media horde (me, the StreetWise guy and of course, George Castle), Todd refuted the idea that a football field can’t fit on Wrigley’s playing surface.
“My brother Pete and I play football out there all the time,” Todd said. “I run the 40 yard dash in like three seconds, and I can run six seconds and still have room left. So it’s just stupid to say a football field doesn’t fit.”
Cubs president Crane Kenney issued a statement saying the Cubs aren’t to blame for the inability to fit a 120 yard regulation football field onto the playing surface. Kenney’s completely red-assed statement seemed to imply that someone was blaming the fact that Illinois and Nortwestern will have to in essence share an end zone in tomorrow’s game on the Cubs.
Todd took a similarly defensive stance.
“When Northwestern asked if they could have a game at Wrigley (Field), I did some drawings that showed how it would all work.”
Todd then placed this image on his trusty old overhead projector:
Todd explained that not only would the field fit, but that there would still be plenty of room for “Alfons Soriano” to play left field.
When asked if his drawing was to scale, Todd replied, “To what, now?”
It was pointed out to Todd that his field was only 50 yards long, and that he had misspelled “Northwestern.”
His replies were: “No it’s not.” And, “Oh, are there two ‘f’s?”
Todd was asked if he would be “In attendance” tomorrow and he answered: “No, I’ll be here at the game.”