Pitching matchup
Cubs: The Lawnmower 9-6, 2.95 ERA
Brewers: Ben Hendrickson 0-3, 9.75 ERA
113 Comments
Andy
on July 29, 2004 at 12:27 pm
While you wait for today’s game, you can shop for lovely items like this:
http://www.cafeshops.com/desipio.12573507
Appropriate for business casual at the office and a lovely night on the town with your favorite lady friend. Or your right hand. Whatever you’re "scoring" with lately. ;)
Tom Goodwin
on July 29, 2004 at 12:29 pm
Whoo, I’m starting today!
Todd Walker
on July 29, 2004 at 12:32 pm
Woah I’m starting too..Alex is sitting on his ass.
Corey
on July 29, 2004 at 12:36 pm
Not only am I protecting Lee in the lineup, but I’m also hitting in front of Ramirez. Dusty’s a genius!
Dusty
on July 29, 2004 at 12:36 pm
Alex will PH.
Sammy
on July 29, 2004 at 12:37 pm
No worries, buddy, I still hit third!
Aramis Ramirez
on July 29, 2004 at 12:38 pm
I pronounce that I shall have a huge day today
Cubstalk.com Poster
on July 29, 2004 at 12:40 pm
Gonzalez and Grudzielanek are sitting which means they must be getting traded!!!!!!111
Alex (Seabass) Gonzalez
on July 29, 2004 at 12:52 pm
I just hit a grand slam..At least one of us Alex Gonzalez’s can hit.
Ron Santo
on July 29, 2004 at 1:08 pm
Can I remember anyone’s name. Ah..Ah…Ah….Ah….
Todd Walker
on July 29, 2004 at 1:16 pm
That double play probably just got me 2 weeks on the bench
Big Z
on July 29, 2004 at 1:24 pm
Who can box with me before the games, now that Franny B. is in Iowa. Hey, Gabor come here.
Carlos Zambrano
on July 29, 2004 at 1:30 pm
Gotta love high pitch counts in the first inning
Fist pump
on July 29, 2004 at 1:32 pm
You can do me. You struck out the side with runners on 2nd & 3rd.
Just save something for later — there are 8 more innings.
Dead as Trade Talks
on July 29, 2004 at 1:33 pm
That is what this version of Cubs Live is like.
KKKKKorey
on July 29, 2004 at 1:35 pm
guess what?? I struck out
Cubs Offense
on July 29, 2004 at 1:37 pm
Nomar Who????
2 Double Plays
on July 29, 2004 at 1:39 pm
Cubs offense love us
Jim Hendry
on July 29, 2004 at 1:42 pm
The reason the Gamecast is so quiet is that Andy has traded a few Intrepid Readers: Sox Fan Steve, BC, Sloth and Dave B to sonsofsamhorn.com for the guy who goes by Todd Benzinger, and 3 new trade rumors fresh from "Wall Street."
The Lawnmower
on July 29, 2004 at 1:44 pm
That was easy, so that’s why Maddux has been telling me to get ahead of hitters.
Ben Hendrickson
on July 29, 2004 at 1:46 pm
I’m 0-3 but thanks to the Cubs I might actually get my first win
Togg Hollandsworth
on July 29, 2004 at 1:46 pm
I’m Todd’s new son. Was Todd’s brain in his leg the day he hit that foul.
Doctor Julius Hibbert
on July 29, 2004 at 1:48 pm
Togg’s a pretty name for a girl, but I don’t know about for a boy. Eh heh-heh-heh.
Ben Hendrickson
on July 29, 2004 at 1:49 pm
I am oen of the Children of the Corn all grown up.
Jose Macias
on July 29, 2004 at 1:54 pm
I’ve been benched today. Does that mean I’m getting traded, too?
Ben Hendrickson
on July 29, 2004 at 1:55 pm
I’m changing my name to Cy Young
Bort
on July 29, 2004 at 1:55 pm
I also have a good name. Todd should have considered my name. It’s a perfectly cromulent name.
Sloth
on July 29, 2004 at 1:55 pm
Awww, shit. I don’t WANNA be a Sawx fan!
Big Z
on July 29, 2004 at 1:57 pm
Kerry told me to let the pitcher get a base hit like he did last night. It’ll wear him out running the bases when he comes around to score.
Chippy also subscribes to this theory.
Peterbilt
on July 29, 2004 at 1:57 pm
People need to start drilling Counsell with that gay batting stance
Big Z
on July 29, 2004 at 2:01 pm
Not me. I never drill anyone.
Sloth
on July 29, 2004 at 2:07 pm
I don’t wanna be a pirate!
Brilliant
on July 29, 2004 at 2:07 pm
"OK, uh, let’s, uh, try to get a couple of runs…"
Thanks, Ron Santo. You have the prescription for the daily blues.
Korey
on July 29, 2004 at 2:08 pm
Whew! In play! My on base vs. strikeout ratio doesn’t change.
Fire Gary Matthews Please
on July 29, 2004 at 2:10 pm
These guess can’t hit anything
Dave B
on July 29, 2004 at 2:12 pm
I’m a 5 and 10 guy (5 shots and 10 beers) so I am going to have to waive my no-trade contract before that trade goes through.
Al Bino
on July 29, 2004 at 2:15 pm
I’m Ben Hendrickson.
Man, you’d think with the roof open he’d melt in the sun.
The Answer is: 7.31
on July 29, 2004 at 2:18 pm
Question: What is the similarity between Hendrickson’s ERA and the number of batters in the Cubs’ lineup that should be at AAA?
Gary Matthews
on July 29, 2004 at 2:18 pm
It’s not my fault that every pitcher we face has "great stuff" that day. Ben Hendrickson will be the new Cy Young, mark my words.
Sergio Mitre will win the 2011 Ben Hendrickson.
Peterbilt
on July 29, 2004 at 2:19 pm
What a bunch of jackasses we have playing today
Chicago Cubs hitters
on July 29, 2004 at 2:23 pm
Hey, it’s get away day. We’re trying to get this game done ASAP. That’s why we can’t hit shit.
5 Innings 1:20
on July 29, 2004 at 2:26 pm
Cubs must be worried about that long distance they have to travel before tomorrow’s game.
Todd Hollandsworth
on July 29, 2004 at 2:28 pm
I will come back to save this team in August in honor of Togg.
Mayor Daley
on July 29, 2004 at 2:28 pm
What game tomorrow?
Push to the right side
on July 29, 2004 at 2:31 pm
Can Walker push it to the right side? Santo is in need of some glucose.
Dusty Baker
on July 29, 2004 at 2:32 pm
Oh, s#it. What do I do with Grudz?
Karry Ling
on July 29, 2004 at 2:32 pm
Hello again everybody, it’s your old pal Karry Ling! I’m here at Miller Park with an exclusive interview with Alex Gonzalez.
Hey Alex, how are things going?
Alex: Not too bad. I’m just sitting here in the clubhouse watching Guiding Light, cleaning my shower shoes and waiting for tonight’s game.
Karry: Uh, Alex. The game’s going on right now.
Alex: Crap. I wondered why I was the only one in here.
Karry: What do you think about the trade rumors?
Alex: What trade rumors?
Karry: Oh, that’s right, you don’t read those. Did you see what Desipio wrote today about the reason you don’t read those trade rumors? They said it was because the newspaper’s always two steps to your left and you can’t get it anymore.
Alex: That’s good. I think that just hurt my millionaire feelings.
Karry: Do you want to be traded to Boston.
Alex: Hell no. You think I want to be the guy who replaces Nomar? I’d rather be the new James Bond. At least 38,000 drunken racists don’t show up to watch you hack a movie franchise to bits.
Karry: We’ve got a report that you’re going to be dealt to Boston this afternoon for Nomar, along with Sergio Meat Tray and Matt Clement. But that you’ll then be passed along to Montreal for Orlando Cabrera.
Alex: So I end up in Montreal? That’s not too bad. There’s nobody at those games to boo me. And on the road I’m very popular.
Karry: Do you think it’s a coincidence that you’re the subject of trade rumors and not only didn’t the Cubs play you today but they forgot to tell you that it was a one o’clock start?
Alex: Actually they probably left a message on my phone at the hotel. I never answer it when I’m watching SpectraVision and having a little "alone time."
Karry: I know the feeling. Hey, good luck in Montreal.
Alex: Thanks. Whoever you are.
Andy
on July 29, 2004 at 2:34 pm
Does that count as Walker "pushing" it to the right side? You know an RBI double to right?
Moises Alou
on July 29, 2004 at 2:35 pm
Dustbag, if you need to pinch hit, let me know. I’ve got to piss like a racehorse but I don’t want to waste it.
Sammyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
on July 29, 2004 at 2:35 pm
Dees is why I no get days off, buddy!
Three zip, buddy!
Come to my house Nomar, buddy!
Andy
on July 29, 2004 at 2:36 pm
Yep, that third time around the order will get you every time. When your ERA is a TD and a two point conversion, anyway.
B.C.
on July 29, 2004 at 2:36 pm
We scored?!?!?!?
I figured the Cubs’ never-ending quest to make every bad pitcher they face look good this season would just continue today.
Dusty
on July 29, 2004 at 2:36 pm
See, bitches? SOMETIMES I can construct a lineup!
Cubs offense
on July 29, 2004 at 2:37 pm
Apparently it took us until the 6th to realize that Ben Hendrickson was pitching.
B.C.
on July 29, 2004 at 2:37 pm
I post and Sammy hits a homer. Wow… Bad timing…
Pushed to left
on July 29, 2004 at 2:38 pm
Did Sammy push the ball to left field? Or did he pull it to right?
Cubs offense
on July 29, 2004 at 2:39 pm
We thought it was Ben Sheets. Gabor that is the last time we listen to you read the pitcher’s name.
Corey Patterson
on July 29, 2004 at 2:40 pm
Hey Chuck!
How about you call me BUNTSINGLEorey from now on?
B.C.
on July 29, 2004 at 2:40 pm
In other news, Houston is losing to Arizona 6-1 at the moment.
That won’t stop Chip from mentioning how they are getting hot two innings from now.
Kent Mercker
on July 29, 2004 at 2:40 pm
The Brewers are just waiting til I’m on the mound for their offensive explosion. A couple walks and some wild pitches, and this thing should turn around pretty quick.
Moises
on July 29, 2004 at 2:41 pm
Ben Sheets? Maybe I should try that on my hands, too.
Inherited runners
on July 29, 2004 at 2:41 pm
Kent lets us score all the time.
Kent Mercker
on July 29, 2004 at 2:44 pm
My ERA is a teeny 2.08 because all the runs I let score get charged to the other pitchers. It pays to be a LOOGY.
And now, a word from our Sponsor
on July 29, 2004 at 2:46 pm
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It takes over 30,000 bowls to equal the fiber content of one bowl of oat bran. You’d have to eat ten bowls a day, every day for eight and a half years!
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Cub Offense
on July 29, 2004 at 2:47 pm
There, Zambrano, there’s all the run support you’re gonna get. We’re spent!
And now, a word from our Sponsor
on July 29, 2004 at 2:48 pm
This inning of Cubs radio brought to you by:
Colon Blow!
It takes over 30,000 bowls to equal the fiber content of one bowl of oat bran. You’d have to eat ten bowls a day, every day for eight and a half years!
Jingle: "Colon Blow and you-u-u-u in the morning"
Warning: may cause abdominal distention. Consult a physician.
Chip Biggio
on July 29, 2004 at 2:50 pm
Update in Houston: The Beege is 2-3 with 2 runs scored.
Chip
on July 29, 2004 at 2:52 pm
Actually, it’s up in Milwaukee after I saw Beege’s day.
Andy Clettite
on July 29, 2004 at 2:54 pm
Mah elbow durn fell off.
Corey Patterson
on July 29, 2004 at 2:57 pm
Hey, Chuck, if you’re out there somewhere sticking pins into my bobblehead (if I had one)…didja see that catch?
Korey
on July 29, 2004 at 3:04 pm
Oh, Chuck knows I can catch fly balls. He just hates that Doug Dascenzo was just about as good at that part of the game, yet he was a better, smarter player everywhere else.
Korey
on July 29, 2004 at 3:09 pm
How many times do you see it? Great play in the field followed by a pathetically weak-assed plate appearence.
Jim Hendry
on July 29, 2004 at 3:10 pm
I like Corey.
Corey
on July 29, 2004 at 3:12 pm
Hey, when I’m normally bookended in the outfield by those two geriatics Sosa and Alou, I better be damn good at chasing down fly balls.
B.C.
on July 29, 2004 at 3:13 pm
Hey, the bullpen can give up three runs and still win the game!
We can win this one, right?
Cubs
on July 29, 2004 at 3:16 pm
Maaaaybe. It’s all up to Ramon, really.
True Fan?
on July 29, 2004 at 3:22 pm
Yay! The Cubs suck! I care so much that I rip them *before* they do something stupid.
I thought all you whiney fans ditched after the 2-game sweep at the hands of the Cardinals?
It’s so refreshing to have such biting pessimism with a 4-0 lead. Chillax, fellas.
Time's up
on July 29, 2004 at 3:22 pm
114 pitches. I gotta get outta her.
Love,
Carlos
Hawkins
on July 29, 2004 at 3:23 pm
Hopefully they score at least one so I can come in and blow the save.
140 pitches
on July 29, 2004 at 3:26 pm
Carlos is gunning for me, bitch!
Desipio Shopper
on July 29, 2004 at 3:27 pm
I like the "Your favorite team sucks" shirt. Can you make the imprint bigger, though? I’m so picky.
LaTroy
on July 29, 2004 at 3:28 pm
Hey, those umps better watch out if I get in the game. Think I don’t remember that call they blew on that Walker double? Or that missed call at 1st with Wellemeyer on the mound yesterday? I’ll remember that sh1t forever!
Andy
on July 29, 2004 at 3:29 pm
Steve just said "Jim Essian." My dogs are howling.
And I don’t have any dogs.
Steve from UC
on July 29, 2004 at 3:31 pm
That was one of the shorter innings in recent memory. Damn you, Grudz, Good, and Walk!
Todd Walker
on July 29, 2004 at 3:33 pm
Hey, Steve, Grud is my friend. I couldn’t very well get another hit right after he struck out and make him look bad. I’m just a nice guy, that’s all.
Steve from UC, again
on July 29, 2004 at 3:33 pm
Er … half-innings. Let’s hope that it’s a short full-inning too.
Latroy
on July 29, 2004 at 3:33 pm
I haven’t thrown the last three games. Does that count for my suspension?
Kerry Wood
on July 29, 2004 at 3:34 pm
And I was injured. I think "DL" and "Suspension" sound very similar.
Cubstalk.com Message Board
on July 29, 2004 at 3:35 pm
They observed that Glendon Rusch warmed up in the eighth, so there’s no way Clement is being traded.
Very perceptive. Much like someone sniffing glue is perceptive.
Lyle Overbay
on July 29, 2004 at 3:35 pm
My deal with the devil expired at the All-Star Break.
Glen Don
on July 29, 2004 at 3:37 pm
The big secret is that I’M getting traded to the Dbacks straight-up for Randy Johnson! I’m supposed to keep my mouth shut about it, but wow, isn’t that awesome?
Andy
on July 29, 2004 at 3:38 pm
Love the hilarious "Bartman for President" sign. Very clever. Now allow me to beat those hillbillies senseless with their own gunrack.
WGN Producers
on July 29, 2004 at 3:38 pm
Hurry up Kap, get that Glendon-for-Johnson rumor on the air right now! We’ve got to scoop the Score and ESPN!
Latroy
on July 29, 2004 at 3:38 pm
Maybe you will need yet?
The Farns
on July 29, 2004 at 3:39 pm
I can still blow this.
Wes Helms
on July 29, 2004 at 3:39 pm
Don’t worry. I never met a rally I couldn’t end.
Ice Man
on July 29, 2004 at 3:39 pm
Where am I?
La Troy
on July 29, 2004 at 3:40 pm
Nice job, Farnzie. It’s a save-sit now. That helps me acheive my incents if I get in this game.
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on June 17, 2005 at 4:26 pm
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While you wait for today’s game, you can shop for lovely items like this:
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Appropriate for business casual at the office and a lovely night on the town with your favorite lady friend. Or your right hand. Whatever you’re "scoring" with lately. ;)
Whoo, I’m starting today!
Woah I’m starting too..Alex is sitting on his ass.
Not only am I protecting Lee in the lineup, but I’m also hitting in front of Ramirez. Dusty’s a genius!
Alex will PH.
No worries, buddy, I still hit third!
I pronounce that I shall have a huge day today
Gonzalez and Grudzielanek are sitting which means they must be getting traded!!!!!!111
I just hit a grand slam..At least one of us Alex Gonzalez’s can hit.
Can I remember anyone’s name. Ah..Ah…Ah….Ah….
That double play probably just got me 2 weeks on the bench
Who can box with me before the games, now that Franny B. is in Iowa. Hey, Gabor come here.
Gotta love high pitch counts in the first inning
You can do me. You struck out the side with runners on 2nd & 3rd.
Just save something for later — there are 8 more innings.
That is what this version of Cubs Live is like.
guess what?? I struck out
Nomar Who????
Cubs offense love us
The reason the Gamecast is so quiet is that Andy has traded a few Intrepid Readers: Sox Fan Steve, BC, Sloth and Dave B to sonsofsamhorn.com for the guy who goes by Todd Benzinger, and 3 new trade rumors fresh from "Wall Street."
That was easy, so that’s why Maddux has been telling me to get ahead of hitters.
I’m 0-3 but thanks to the Cubs I might actually get my first win
I’m Todd’s new son. Was Todd’s brain in his leg the day he hit that foul.
Togg’s a pretty name for a girl, but I don’t know about for a boy. Eh heh-heh-heh.
I am oen of the Children of the Corn all grown up.
I’ve been benched today. Does that mean I’m getting traded, too?
I’m changing my name to Cy Young
I also have a good name. Todd should have considered my name. It’s a perfectly cromulent name.
Awww, shit. I don’t WANNA be a Sawx fan!
Kerry told me to let the pitcher get a base hit like he did last night. It’ll wear him out running the bases when he comes around to score.
Chippy also subscribes to this theory.
People need to start drilling Counsell with that gay batting stance
Not me. I never drill anyone.
I don’t wanna be a pirate!
"OK, uh, let’s, uh, try to get a couple of runs…"
Thanks, Ron Santo. You have the prescription for the daily blues.
Whew! In play! My on base vs. strikeout ratio doesn’t change.
These guess can’t hit anything
I’m a 5 and 10 guy (5 shots and 10 beers) so I am going to have to waive my no-trade contract before that trade goes through.
I’m Ben Hendrickson.
Man, you’d think with the roof open he’d melt in the sun.
Question: What is the similarity between Hendrickson’s ERA and the number of batters in the Cubs’ lineup that should be at AAA?
It’s not my fault that every pitcher we face has "great stuff" that day. Ben Hendrickson will be the new Cy Young, mark my words.
Sergio Mitre will win the 2011 Ben Hendrickson.
What a bunch of jackasses we have playing today
Hey, it’s get away day. We’re trying to get this game done ASAP. That’s why we can’t hit shit.
Cubs must be worried about that long distance they have to travel before tomorrow’s game.
I will come back to save this team in August in honor of Togg.
What game tomorrow?
Can Walker push it to the right side? Santo is in need of some glucose.
Oh, s#it. What do I do with Grudz?
Hello again everybody, it’s your old pal Karry Ling! I’m here at Miller Park with an exclusive interview with Alex Gonzalez.
Hey Alex, how are things going?
Alex: Not too bad. I’m just sitting here in the clubhouse watching Guiding Light, cleaning my shower shoes and waiting for tonight’s game.
Karry: Uh, Alex. The game’s going on right now.
Alex: Crap. I wondered why I was the only one in here.
Karry: What do you think about the trade rumors?
Alex: What trade rumors?
Karry: Oh, that’s right, you don’t read those. Did you see what Desipio wrote today about the reason you don’t read those trade rumors? They said it was because the newspaper’s always two steps to your left and you can’t get it anymore.
Alex: That’s good. I think that just hurt my millionaire feelings.
Karry: Do you want to be traded to Boston.
Alex: Hell no. You think I want to be the guy who replaces Nomar? I’d rather be the new James Bond. At least 38,000 drunken racists don’t show up to watch you hack a movie franchise to bits.
Karry: We’ve got a report that you’re going to be dealt to Boston this afternoon for Nomar, along with Sergio Meat Tray and Matt Clement. But that you’ll then be passed along to Montreal for Orlando Cabrera.
Alex: So I end up in Montreal? That’s not too bad. There’s nobody at those games to boo me. And on the road I’m very popular.
Karry: Do you think it’s a coincidence that you’re the subject of trade rumors and not only didn’t the Cubs play you today but they forgot to tell you that it was a one o’clock start?
Alex: Actually they probably left a message on my phone at the hotel. I never answer it when I’m watching SpectraVision and having a little "alone time."
Karry: I know the feeling. Hey, good luck in Montreal.
Alex: Thanks. Whoever you are.
Does that count as Walker "pushing" it to the right side? You know an RBI double to right?
Dustbag, if you need to pinch hit, let me know. I’ve got to piss like a racehorse but I don’t want to waste it.
Dees is why I no get days off, buddy!
Three zip, buddy!
Come to my house Nomar, buddy!
Yep, that third time around the order will get you every time. When your ERA is a TD and a two point conversion, anyway.
We scored?!?!?!?
I figured the Cubs’ never-ending quest to make every bad pitcher they face look good this season would just continue today.
See, bitches? SOMETIMES I can construct a lineup!
Apparently it took us until the 6th to realize that Ben Hendrickson was pitching.
I post and Sammy hits a homer. Wow… Bad timing…
Did Sammy push the ball to left field? Or did he pull it to right?
We thought it was Ben Sheets. Gabor that is the last time we listen to you read the pitcher’s name.
Hey Chuck!
How about you call me BUNTSINGLEorey from now on?
In other news, Houston is losing to Arizona 6-1 at the moment.
That won’t stop Chip from mentioning how they are getting hot two innings from now.
The Brewers are just waiting til I’m on the mound for their offensive explosion. A couple walks and some wild pitches, and this thing should turn around pretty quick.
Ben Sheets? Maybe I should try that on my hands, too.
Kent lets us score all the time.
My ERA is a teeny 2.08 because all the runs I let score get charged to the other pitchers. It pays to be a LOOGY.
This inning of Cubs radio brought to you by:
Colon Blow!
It takes over 30,000 bowls to equal the fiber content of one bowl of oat bran. You’d have to eat ten bowls a day, every day for eight and a half years!
Jingle: "Colon Blow and you-u-u-u in the morning"
Warning: may cause abdominal distention. Consult a physician.
There, Zambrano, there’s all the run support you’re gonna get. We’re spent!
This inning of Cubs radio brought to you by:
![]("http://snltranscripts.jt.org/89/pics/89ecolonblow3.jpg"/)
Colon Blow!
It takes over 30,000 bowls to equal the fiber content of one bowl of oat bran. You’d have to eat ten bowls a day, every day for eight and a half years!
Jingle: "Colon Blow and you-u-u-u in the morning"
Warning: may cause abdominal distention. Consult a physician.
Update in Houston: The Beege is 2-3 with 2 runs scored.
Actually, it’s up in Milwaukee after I saw Beege’s day.
Mah elbow durn fell off.
Hey, Chuck, if you’re out there somewhere sticking pins into my bobblehead (if I had one)…didja see that catch?
Oh, Chuck knows I can catch fly balls. He just hates that Doug Dascenzo was just about as good at that part of the game, yet he was a better, smarter player everywhere else.
How many times do you see it? Great play in the field followed by a pathetically weak-assed plate appearence.
I like Corey.
Hey, when I’m normally bookended in the outfield by those two geriatics Sosa and Alou, I better be damn good at chasing down fly balls.
Hey, the bullpen can give up three runs and still win the game!
We can win this one, right?
Maaaaybe. It’s all up to Ramon, really.
Yay! The Cubs suck! I care so much that I rip them *before* they do something stupid.
I thought all you whiney fans ditched after the 2-game sweep at the hands of the Cardinals?
It’s so refreshing to have such biting pessimism with a 4-0 lead. Chillax, fellas.
114 pitches. I gotta get outta her.
Love,
Carlos
Hopefully they score at least one so I can come in and blow the save.
Carlos is gunning for me, bitch!
I like the "Your favorite team sucks" shirt. Can you make the imprint bigger, though? I’m so picky.
Hey, those umps better watch out if I get in the game. Think I don’t remember that call they blew on that Walker double? Or that missed call at 1st with Wellemeyer on the mound yesterday? I’ll remember that sh1t forever!
Steve just said "Jim Essian." My dogs are howling.
And I don’t have any dogs.
That was one of the shorter innings in recent memory. Damn you, Grudz, Good, and Walk!
Hey, Steve, Grud is my friend. I couldn’t very well get another hit right after he struck out and make him look bad. I’m just a nice guy, that’s all.
Er … half-innings. Let’s hope that it’s a short full-inning too.
I haven’t thrown the last three games. Does that count for my suspension?
And I was injured. I think "DL" and "Suspension" sound very similar.
They observed that Glendon Rusch warmed up in the eighth, so there’s no way Clement is being traded.
Very perceptive. Much like someone sniffing glue is perceptive.
My deal with the devil expired at the All-Star Break.
The big secret is that I’M getting traded to the Dbacks straight-up for Randy Johnson! I’m supposed to keep my mouth shut about it, but wow, isn’t that awesome?
Love the hilarious "Bartman for President" sign. Very clever. Now allow me to beat those hillbillies senseless with their own gunrack.
Hurry up Kap, get that Glendon-for-Johnson rumor on the air right now! We’ve got to scoop the Score and ESPN!
Maybe you will need yet?
I can still blow this.
Don’t worry. I never met a rally I couldn’t end.
Where am I?
Nice job, Farnzie. It’s a save-sit now. That helps me acheive my incents if I get in this game.
Instead of Bartman for Prez, how about Ronnie Woo Woo to Iraq and declare him a WMD.
Come on, take this tight-pantsed lunatic out of the game.
Stop the panic.
A lefty is starting for Philly tomorrow so I’m probably gonna lead off…you know, with my 2004 .152 versus lefties BA.
I’m all over Kerry.
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