So the Cubs finally have a new manager. I for one was getting pretty antsy about the whole thing. Mostly because they have a game coming up…in four months.
They have hired Rick Renteria. Renteria has served the last few years as the Padres bench coach, dispensing pearls of wisdom to Bud Black. He spent eight years in the minors as a manager, including a season in lovely Geneva, Illinois managing the Kane County Cougars.
Our buddy Al Yellon took a break from his annual vacation on Fire Island to voice his depression that Theo Epstein FAILED AGAIN and couldn’t talk Joe Girardi into dumping the New York Yankees for the Cubs. Al says he’s going to write just a few words, but goes on for…ever, but let’s just hit the highlights.
I wish Joe well — and wish him luck, too, because the Yankees seem poised to enter a decline phase.
Terrible decision, Joe. The Yankees are about to suck, and you could have been basking in the glow of the mighty Chicago Cubs! Hell, the Yankees don’t win the World Series every year, they’ve only won 27 of them in 100 years, so on average they have to wait nearly FOUR YEARS before they can celebrate another world’s championship. It’s gonna be a rough two fifths of a decade, Joe!
Those of you who sleep under a rock probably just realized that the Cubs fired Dale Sveum yesterday. You probably noticed because you rolled over and he wasn’t there.
On Sunday night, Theo Epstein and Dale had a couple of beers and chatted for a couple of hours. During the chat, Theo fired Dale. Given Dale’s crack communication skills he probably didn’t notice.
So yesterday they met at Wrigley Field and Theo fired him again. Some (well, let’s be honest almost all) of the media are proclaiming Theo’s first managerial hire with the Cubs a failure.
They are, of course, wrong.
Last week was just one giant clusterfuck for the boy geniuses (geniui?) that run the Cubs. Theo Epstein claims his remarks that no decision had been made on bringing Dale Sveum back for the 2014 season that he’s contractually obligated to manage, were just a case of him “answering questions honestly.”
His honesty started speculation that the Cubs were going to wait and see if Joe Girardi and Ron Gardenhire become available before they tell Dale if he needs to take down the Slayer posters in his office.
When Theo decided to clarify things he pointed out that Dale is not being evaluated on wins and losses (good thing for Dale), but on player development and communication.
Dear Cubs fans,
I’m Dale Sveum, and I’m the manager of the Cubs. We play baseball for a living, and we’re not winning a lot of games or nothing right now, but this is pretty much the best bunch of guys a manager could ever ask for and we’re trying real hard. My contract isn’t over until the end of next season, but there’s a lot of talk now that the Cubs might not let me manage the team next year.
Let me be the first to tell you, that, that is a crock of shit.
Pardon my French.
I guess shit is French for crap or something.
I know my team hasn’t won a lot of games these last couple of years, and I take full responsibility for that, because I’m the manager. I learned from Tito Francona over there when we was in Boston together that everything is the manager’s fault. Even when the third base coach sends like three runners to easy outs at home plate during one inning or something. When I was up there in Milwaukee with Ned, we used to get pissed drunk and go jogging, and even if one of your coaches trips and shoves you into traffic and you break your collarbone, it’s your fault. It’s just how this works.
Ryan Braun’s raging herpes? That’s Ron Roenicke’s fault.
Delmon Young yells mean things at Jewish people? That’s on Jim Leyland.
Ryan Dempster goes on the DL when a seltzer bottle explodes in his pants…nah, that one was on Dempster.
A lot of good things have happened since I got this job when Mike Maddux decided the house he was building in Dallas was too nice for him to move to Chicago.