There are dozens…no, probably hundreds of people who take the time to write, at least occasionally, online about the Chicago Cubs. Some of them are entertaining, some aren’t, some are pretty good and some are terrible. But for some reason, one stands above us all when it comes to spewing opinionated nonsense about our favorite baseball team. It’s not just opinionated. Hell, anybody worth reading has an opinion, it’s especially sanctimonious opinionated nonsense in this case.
Over the years, I have taken the time to take this person to task when he’s been especially daft. If I did it every time he wrote something dumb, it would be my full-time job. Nowadays when he’s really asking for it, people on Twitter send up the Al signal, and I feel compelled to drop what I’m doing and respond.
In an effort to needlessly remind us how incompetent they are at pretty much everything, the Cubs, to their own astonishment, unveiled a new mascot yesterday and everybody hated…him? It? Whatever. Clark the Cub is meant to hug the shit out of little Cubs fans and sell a lot of swag to the gullible parents of those little kids. That’s it. He’s not going to be riding a four wheeler around Wrigley, crashing into the brick wall and dying…though, that would be awesome. He’s unlikely to dance on the dugouts or stick a pie in a player’s face after the rare Cubs win. What he’s supposed to do is wander around the concourses looking cute and distracting Cubs fans like the last Cubs mascot to not wear pants…Marla Collins.
So the Cubs finally have a new manager. I for one was getting pretty antsy about the whole thing. Mostly because they have a game coming up…in four months.
They have hired Rick Renteria. Renteria has served the last few years as the Padres bench coach, dispensing pearls of wisdom to Bud Black. He spent eight years in the minors as a manager, including a season in lovely Geneva, Illinois managing the Kane County Cougars.
Our buddy Al Yellon took a break from his annual vacation on Fire Island to voice his depression that Theo Epstein FAILED AGAIN and couldn’t talk Joe Girardi into dumping the New York Yankees for the Cubs. Al says he’s going to write just a few words, but goes on for…ever, but let’s just hit the highlights.
I wish Joe well — and wish him luck, too, because the Yankees seem poised to enter a decline phase.
Terrible decision, Joe. The Yankees are about to suck, and you could have been basking in the glow of the mighty Chicago Cubs! Hell, the Yankees don’t win the World Series every year, they’ve only won 27 of them in 100 years, so on average they have to wait nearly FOUR YEARS before they can celebrate another world’s championship. It’s gonna be a rough two fifths of a decade, Joe!
Those of you who sleep under a rock probably just realized that the Cubs fired Dale Sveum yesterday. You probably noticed because you rolled over and he wasn’t there.
On Sunday night, Theo Epstein and Dale had a couple of beers and chatted for a couple of hours. During the chat, Theo fired Dale. Given Dale’s crack communication skills he probably didn’t notice.
So yesterday they met at Wrigley Field and Theo fired him again. Some (well, let’s be honest almost all) of the media are proclaiming Theo’s first managerial hire with the Cubs a failure.
They are, of course, wrong.