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News: Oct 12 - Oral History: Cubs hire Theo  http://www.desipio.com/?p=3639
 
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1  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Bears 2015 Draft Discussion on: September 15, 2014, 03:30:44 PM
Starting to regret my Levi's Stadium ticket purchase for Sunday.  Is there any chance the Bears don't get embarrassed in this game?  1%?

If this is "The Cutler Game" we've all been waiting our entire lives for, they won't get embarrassed.

So...this was not THE Cutler Game but it was certainly A Cutler Game.

Was it the RIGHT Cutler Game?

For that moment, yes.

Pretty sure that THE signature game won't end up with a 5.9 YPA, but considering that "THE CUTLER GAME" for Bears fans and the media to validate him will involve cold weather, taking a big hit or two, and probably beating the Packers, this was a good start.

Does Kaepernick have to deal with the flaming butthurt masses after that performance last night? If not, how come? That dude was a disaster.

Also, Harbaugh electing not to get Kaep on the move on 4th and ballgame was baffling.

Also, fuck the Niners so hard in their entire fucking face.

Not sure about the masses, but if SF's press is anything like Chicago's, I'll bet there were something like 14 columns this morning questioning whether the 49ers can win a Super Bowl with a heavily tattooed quarterback.
2  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Bears 2015 Draft Discussion on: September 13, 2014, 07:24:34 AM

That entire article has one quote from Cutler, which is him taking responsibility.

I pointed that out the other day. If Cutler was the team cancer and excuse maker everyone has made him out to be you'd think it wouldn't be that difficult to find one damn example of him throwing someone under the bus.

The article is all kinds of bizarre. Then I started reading the comments and several of them were logical and well thought out. What a time to be alive.
3  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Morning in America: Butthurt Achieved on: September 12, 2014, 04:18:53 PM
Honestly, if it would bring peace in our time I would give ISIS all the Texans they could eat.

That might be good for the country as a whole. Just have a nice little war isolated to Texas. 

Make sure to get Willie Nelson, Kerry Wood, Chris Bosh and Devin the Dude out of there and then the heathens can have it.

Pretty sure Kerry is in Chicago full time.  I'll send a chopper for the rest.
4  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Morning in America: Butthurt Achieved on: September 12, 2014, 03:05:37 PM
Honestly, if it would bring peace in our time I would give ISIS all the Texans they could eat.
5  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Twatheads Twittering on: September 10, 2014, 10:12:27 AM
Are one of you guys maury compson?

Fairly certain he is not one of us.

Kind of wish he was though.
6  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Twatheads Twittering on: September 08, 2014, 11:11:43 AM
TheKapman


do u get ur jay jersey dry cleaned or laundered

I hate to be the dongchugger, but in what world is Cutler near the top of the blame for that loss?

That was a return to 2009 Bears football where you had a situation in which Cutler had to be perfect and he wasn't. The offensive line was good enough but the receiving corps was in disarray. The defense made stops only occasionally. Would Aaron Rodgers have made that asinine Caleb Hanie-esque toss to Kyle Williams? I'm guessing he would not. In my mind that loss was on several people, and some of it was as random as Brandon Marshall fumbling and Alshon picking a bad time to tweak a hammy.

I'm one of the leading Cutler apologists in the free world and I believe that is the type of game he is good enough to pull out - and he didn't. Does that mean he's terrible? No, it means he might... <choke> ... he might not <drinks water> be as good as I think he is.

Honestly, I don't even think he saw Williams, and from his perspective, Martellus was probably open. It's the only photo I use, but:



It appears to me that Williams was probably shielded by Mills

Isn't that kind of the point of the whole Don't Throw Across Your Body Back to the Middle of the Field rule - that you aren't going to have a full view of where you're throwing and are flying blind to some extent?

No Cutler did not lose that game single-handedly, but if I was forced at musketpoint to pick a culprit it would be him. They were driving for the go-ahead score and he made a really bad decision to stop that from happening. I'm a known dumbass, but my hope/expectation was that with Trestman having two years now to grow Jay's football, that he'd expel this type of slapdickery from his system. I think I just need to come to terms with the fact that Jay is never going to have that breakout year where he puts it all together and shoots fireballs of stardom out of his orifices. He's always going to be an above-average QB who will make our buttholes pucker a couple times a game with a terrible decision, but could win a Super Bowl with the right talent around him and a few breaks in the clustermug that is the NFL.

I guess I was just hoping for better from our guy Jake.

Also, I didn't see this play, but unless there's a Buffalo Bill below the numbers that doesn't appear in this photo, it looks like he could have run for a first down fairly easily.
7  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Javier Baez 2014 ROY-MVP-World Series MVP Thread on: September 08, 2014, 09:56:56 AM
Fuck Gordo, back to Baez.

Since taking the golden sombrero in Cincinatti 8/26, he's struck out 11 times in 39 PAs, and he's also walked in each of the last two games.

I know it's not much, but hopefully this means he's going to start forcing pitchers to get inside the strike zone on him.


They said if he qualified, he'd be 7th in the majors in pitches seen per plate appearance. He'll find it.

I mean, that'll happen when you swing and miss as much as he does. But I agree, he'll find it.

that's a good point. I guess the next step would be how many balls vs strikes seen per at bat? How many fouls? I don't know. Seeing pitches is good no matter what since it tires the pitcher out just the same.

I'm flashing back to Apex's hatred of Matt Murton here, along with my favorite line of his, something to the effect that Murton's greatest strength as a hitter was not swinging the bat.

That's also a good point.

I just want to clarify, I am not comparing Murton and Baez as players.  The situation just reminded me of Pex's Murton line, which made me laugh.
8  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Javier Baez 2014 ROY-MVP-World Series MVP Thread on: September 08, 2014, 09:46:49 AM
Fuck Gordo, back to Baez.

Since taking the golden sombrero in Cincinatti 8/26, he's struck out 11 times in 39 PAs, and he's also walked in each of the last two games.

I know it's not much, but hopefully this means he's going to start forcing pitchers to get inside the strike zone on him.


They said if he qualified, he'd be 7th in the majors in pitches seen per plate appearance. He'll find it.

I mean, that'll happen when you swing and miss as much as he does. But I agree, he'll find it.

that's a good point. I guess the next step would be how many balls vs strikes seen per at bat? How many fouls? I don't know. Seeing pitches is good no matter what since it tires the pitcher out just the same.

I'm flashing back to Apex's hatred of Matt Murton, along with my favorite line of his, something to the effect that Murton's greatest strength as a hitter was not swinging the bat.
9  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Totally Unreadable on: September 03, 2014, 12:57:56 PM
If anyone could just find the proof that we all know is out there of Gordo buttfucking stray dogs maybe he'd finally get fired.

Anyone know any of the 4chan guys?

I think we all know that Thrill knows those guys.

Did I miss out on a meming?

Like anyone even knows at this point.

So it is written.



Thrill doesn't strike me as the kind of person who's ready to kill some woman because she didn't like a video game or whatever





In that second one you could be talking about literally anyone in the Shoutbox.
10  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Totally Unreadable on: September 03, 2014, 12:14:15 PM
If anyone could just find the proof that we all know is out there of Gordo buttfucking stray dogs maybe he'd finally get fired.

Anyone know any of the 4chan guys?

I think we all know that Thrill knows those guys.

Did I miss out on a meming?

Like anyone even knows at this point.

So it is written.



Thrill doesn't strike me as the kind of person who's ready to kill some woman because she didn't like a video game or whatever

Well SOMEBODY stole my nude photos...
11  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Bearbonnais 2014: Emstink's Evil Plan Hatches In Earnest on: September 02, 2014, 01:51:22 PM

WOULD BUTKUS OR SINGLETARY OR OTIS WILSON OR URLACKER ABANDON DA BEARES FOR CALIFORNYA? I THINK NOT, MY FRENT.

Oddly, I feel like Ditka would completely sympathize though.

Or else he'd forbid Briggs to go, but offer to show up at the opening himself for a 10% discount off his regular appearance fee.
12  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Bearbonnais 2014: Emstink's Evil Plan Hatches In Earnest on: September 02, 2014, 12:27:56 PM
Paging Huey, Huey to the white courtesy phone...

http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/football/bears/chi-mannelly-floored-briggs-restaurant-20140902-htmlstory.html

13  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Jorge Soler Zero Percent Financing Thud On The Shower Door SPLOOGE Fest on: August 29, 2014, 10:50:23 PM
It'd probably be cheaper to just get a washable plastic shower liner, guys.

I assume you meant to direct this dead body disposal advice to Huey?
14  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Pollyellon banned me on: August 26, 2014, 01:40:40 PM
I try to not waste too much energy on the dumb opinions of Al, but it's really something else for him to instruct people on how to FEEL about something. It's just sports, guy. If you're not going to get irrationally excited sometimes, what the hell is the point?

Quote
Just donít expect me to get all hyperventilated until there is actual success at the MLB level.

Quote
I'll have fun when there's a reason to have fun.

I have a hard time reconciling these statements with the fact that they're coming from a guy who's been sitting in the fucking bleachers for nearly every home game the Cubs have played for the last what, 3 decades?

I read his words in a Seymour Skinner voice

Which Seymour Skinner?
15  General Category / Desipio Lounge / Re: Pollyellon banned me on: August 26, 2014, 11:10:50 AM
I try to not waste too much energy on the dumb opinions of Al, but it's really something else for him to instruct people on how to FEEL about something. It's just sports, guy. If you're not going to get irrationally excited sometimes, what the hell is the point?

Quote
Just donít expect me to get all hyperventilated until there is actual success at the MLB level.

Quote
I'll have fun when there's a reason to have fun.

I have a hard time reconciling these statements with the fact that they're coming from a guy who's been sitting in the fucking bleachers for nearly every home game the Cubs have played for the last what, 3 decades?
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