Single Greatest Thread Ever

[ChuckD]

He was a pretty good player who, by all accounts, loved Chicago and loved playing there.

Shits given = zero.  I think it's weird that something that superfluous has any value to you.

I also find it weird that you have no hard feelings that his inability to throw strikes basically torpedoed two seperate seasons, but you're CLEARLY a bigger man than I am, because that shit frosts my ass (obviously).

It's not that it has value to Eli, but it's not like he was shitting on the town and the fans all the time. It'd be one thing if he was Milton Bradley (❤❤❤), but he was not that. His asshattery is basically him trying to be funny and sportswriters thinking it had some intrinsic value to the club's CHEMISTRY. When, really, it didn't fucking matter either way.

But, anyway, what 2 seasons did he torpedo? I know of 2008, but what's the other one?

Sigh.

We've been over this Yeti--stop smoking so much pot.

Bottom of the 9th, Mets Batting, Behind 0-3, Cubs' Ryan Dempster facing 5-6-7            Jose Macias moves from PR to 2B
Todd Zeile pinch hits for Heath Bell (P) batting 5th

0-3 0 --- 5,(1-2) ..LCFBS O NYM T. Zeile R. Dempster -2% 2% Strikeout Swinging
9 0-3 1 --- 5,(3-1) BBBCB  NYM E. Valent R. Dempster 3% 5% Walk
0-3 1 1-- 6,(3-2) CBFBBB  NYM J. Phillips R. Dempster 6% 10% Walk; Valent to 2B        

LaTroy Hawkins replaces Ryan Dempster pitching and batting 6th

0-3 1 12- 4,(1-2) .BCFX O NYM J. Keppinger L. Hawkins -6% 5% Flyball: RF; Valent to 3B
0-3 2 1-3 5,(2-2) BCF*BX RRR NYM V. Diaz L. Hawkins 49% 54% Home Run (Fly Ball); Valent Scores; Phillips Scores

3-3 2 --- 5,(2-2) FBBSC O NYM G. Williams L. Hawkins -4% 50% Strikeout Looking

And the two guys that Dempster walked?  Well, though Eric Valente was in the midst of a "career year" (.267/.337/.481), he was out of baseball some 30-odd games later with a career line of .234/.307/.389.  The other guy--JR Phillips--was in the midst of tearing up the league in 2004 with what would wind up to be a .218/.298/.363 clip.

Those are the two guys Dempster walked in the 9th inning of a game in which the Cubs led by three runs, in game they absolutely needed to have in order to maintain their slim Wild Card lead.  But nooooooo....he fucking walked those 2 bums--the second of whom was a powerless catcher with a .298 OBP.  All of that would've been forgiven, in my mind, had he done his job in Game 1 of the 2008 NLDS and beyond.   But instead, he essentially did the same goddamn thing again.

1984 notwithstanding, the '04 and '08 were arguably the best Cub teams in the last 30 years, and neither team won a single playoff thanks in no small part to your Canadien hero.

You people tolerate way too much bullshit.

Christ, man.

a) He didn't even give up the runs. It appears, (I had to look this up because I don't even remember this shit) Latroy gave up the dongus.
b) It was 10 years ago
c) They lost 73 games that year. Why give so many fucks about that one?
d) See b).

Good point.

BTW, why do people keep hatin' on Hitler?  That shit was 60 fucking years ago.  Get over it, people!

Got it. Dempster's Hitler.

[Yeti]

So, did he torpedo the season or just factor in to their demise? Would you like me to present a bunch of games where he helped them win in 2004? To that one in 2004 that you can't let go because a guy you hate as a person did something bad to a team you love?

[Slaky]

*starts rolling out police tape*

Alright folks, nothing to see here. We've been Godwinned - this thing is over. Pack it up and head home.

[CT III]

I've missed baseball talk so much.

[Eli]

I've missed baseball talk so much.

[ChuckD]

So, did he torpedo the season or just factor in to their demise? Would you like me to present a bunch of games where he helped them win in 2004? To that one in 2004 that you can't let go because a guy you hate as a person did something bad to a team you love?

I think he committed baseball genocide.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

He was a pretty good player who, by all accounts, loved Chicago and loved playing there.

Shits given = zero.  I think it's weird that something that superfluous has any value to you.

I also find it weird that you have no hard feelings that his inability to throw strikes basically torpedoed two seperate seasons, but you're CLEARLY a bigger man than I am, because that shit frosts my ass (obviously).

It's not that it has value to Eli, but it's not like he was shitting on the town and the fans all the time. It'd be one thing if he was Milton Bradley (❤❤❤), but he was not that. His asshattery is basically him trying to be funny and sportswriters thinking it had some intrinsic value to the club's CHEMISTRY. When, really, it didn't fucking matter either way.

But, anyway, what 2 seasons did he torpedo? I know of 2008, but what's the other one?

Sigh.

We've been over this Yeti--stop smoking so much pot.

Bottom of the 9th, Mets Batting, Behind 0-3, Cubs' Ryan Dempster facing 5-6-7            Jose Macias moves from PR to 2B
Todd Zeile pinch hits for Heath Bell (P) batting 5th

0-3 0 --- 5,(1-2) ..LCFBS O NYM T. Zeile R. Dempster -2% 2% Strikeout Swinging
9 0-3 1 --- 5,(3-1) BBBCB  NYM E. Valent R. Dempster 3% 5% Walk
0-3 1 1-- 6,(3-2) CBFBBB  NYM J. Phillips R. Dempster 6% 10% Walk; Valent to 2B        

LaTroy Hawkins replaces Ryan Dempster pitching and batting 6th

0-3 1 12- 4,(1-2) .BCFX O NYM J. Keppinger L. Hawkins -6% 5% Flyball: RF; Valent to 3B
0-3 2 1-3 5,(2-2) BCF*BX RRR NYM V. Diaz L. Hawkins 49% 54% Home Run (Fly Ball); Valent Scores; Phillips Scores

3-3 2 --- 5,(2-2) FBBSC O NYM G. Williams L. Hawkins -4% 50% Strikeout Looking

And the two guys that Dempster walked?  Well, though Eric Valente was in the midst of a "career year" (.267/.337/.481), he was out of baseball some 30-odd games later with a career line of .234/.307/.389.  The other guy--JR Phillips--was in the midst of tearing up the league in 2004 with what would wind up to be a .218/.298/.363 clip.

Those are the two guys Dempster walked in the 9th inning of a game in which the Cubs led by three runs, in game they absolutely needed to have in order to maintain their slim Wild Card lead.  But nooooooo....he fucking walked those 2 bums--the second of whom was a powerless catcher with a .298 OBP.  All of that would've been forgiven, in my mind, had he done his job in Game 1 of the 2008 NLDS and beyond.   But instead, he essentially did the same goddamn thing again.

1984 notwithstanding, the '04 and '08 were arguably the best Cub teams in the last 30 years, and neither team won a single playoff thanks in no small part to your Canadien hero.

You people tolerate way too much bullshit.

Christ, man.

a) He didn't even give up the runs. It appears, (I had to look this up because I don't even remember this shit) Latroy gave up the dongus.
b) It was 10 years ago
c) They lost 73 games that year. Why give so many fucks about that one?
d) See b).

Good point.

BTW, why do people keep hatin' on Hitler?  That shit was 60 fucking years ago.  Get over it, people!

Got it. Dempster's Hitler.

*taps nose*

[InternetApex]

1.) I don't hate Ryan Dempster
2.) I don't like Ryan Dempster
3.) I don't give a shit about Ryan Dempster
4.) When people say they like Ryan Dempster I judge that person unfairly in a negative way.
5.) When people defend Ryan Dempster against people who hate him I tend to take the quiet position of the hater.
6.) Fuck Ryan Dempster. I hope he gets hit by a bus.

[Yeti]

So, who got released?

[Bort]

So, who got released?

I think it was either:

1. The dogs
2. The bees
3. The dogs with bees in their mouths, so that whenever they bark they shoot bees at you.

[Chuck to Chuck]

Yeah. I'm pissed at one guy on a team coming off a division title and within 5 outs of a pennant that was actually 20 games out of first didn't lock up a wild card.  Yeah, it's ONE GUY I'm upset with for BLOWING EVERYTHING!

If not for Ryan Fucking Dempster, that 2004 team had destiny written all over it.

[Bort]

Yeah. I'm pissed at one guy on a team coming off a division title and within 5 outs of a pennant that was actually 20 games out of first didn't lock up a wild card.  Yeah, it's ONE GUY I'm upset with for BLOWING EVERYTHING!

If not for Ryan Fucking Dempster, that 2004 team had destiny written all over it.

To be fair, you were rooting for them to lose because of Kent Mercker.

[InternetApex]

Yeah. I'm pissed at one guy on a team coming off a division title and within 5 outs of a pennant that was actually 20 games out of first didn't lock up a wild card.  Yeah, it's ONE GUY I'm upset with for BLOWING EVERYTHING!

If not for Ryan Fucking Dempster, that 2004 team had destiny written all over it.

Yeah, there's no way some horseshit wild card team wins the 2004 world series. NO FUCK WAY

[InternetApex]

Yeah. I'm pissed at one guy on a team coming off a division title and within 5 outs of a pennant that was actually 20 games out of first didn't lock up a wild card.  Yeah, it's ONE GUY I'm upset with for BLOWING EVERYTHING!

If not for Ryan Fucking Dempster, that 2004 team had destiny written all over it.

To be fair, you were rooting for them to lose because of Kent Mercker.

Because of the way he mistreated Chip and Stone Pony.

[Chuck to Chuck]

Yeah. I'm pissed at one guy on a team coming off a division title and within 5 outs of a pennant that was actually 20 games out of first didn't lock up a wild card.  Yeah, it's ONE GUY I'm upset with for BLOWING EVERYTHING!

If not for Ryan Fucking Dempster, that 2004 team had destiny written all over it.

To be fair, you were rooting for them to lose because of Kent Mercker.

And several others. That team was detestable and they got what they earned.