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Author Topic: Opening. Day. Female. Odges.  (Read 17572 times)
Fork
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« Reply #390 on: April 05, 2012, 09:49:23 AM »
Quote from: Gilgamesh on April 05, 2012, 09:48:15 AM
Quote from: Slaky on April 05, 2012, 09:39:43 AM
I've noticed an abundance of Cub related thoughts and well wishers on the Facebook today.

Huey posted a baseball related song and apparently he has a dickload friend named Craig (not the Sox Craig from softball who is a nice guy) who decided to use Huard's PANKCITEMENT for Opening Day to remind him that the Cubs are shitty and will always be shitty. Real solid friend you have there Huey.

Can I call him a fucking asshole or does he have guns?

One of the best things about America is that you can get guns more easily than health care, so remember that.

You'd bring saltpeter to an orgy.
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Gilgamesh
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« Reply #391 on: April 05, 2012, 09:55:06 AM »
Quote from: Fork on April 05, 2012, 09:49:23 AM
Quote from: Gilgamesh on April 05, 2012, 09:48:15 AM
Quote from: Slaky on April 05, 2012, 09:39:43 AM
I've noticed an abundance of Cub related thoughts and well wishers on the Facebook today.

Huey posted a baseball related song and apparently he has a dickload friend named Craig (not the Sox Craig from softball who is a nice guy) who decided to use Huard's PANKCITEMENT for Opening Day to remind him that the Cubs are shitty and will always be shitty. Real solid friend you have there Huey.

Can I call him a fucking asshole or does he have guns?

One of the best things about America is that you can get guns more easily than health care, so remember that.

You'd bring saltpeter to an orgy.

Adding some KNO3 (a primary component in fireworks and gunpowder) would certainly add some pop to the orgy.
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This is so bad, I'd root for the Orioles over this fucking team, but I can't. Because they're a fucking drug and you can't kick it and they'll never win anything and they'll always suck, but it'll always be sunny at Wrigley and there will be tits and ivy and an old scoreboard and fucking Chads.
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« Reply #392 on: April 05, 2012, 09:56:17 AM »
And its the first Telander Fisking of the season [which really is the only way to read him.

http://deadspin.com/5899317/rick-telander-cubs-president-theo-epstein-might-walk-on-water-this-season-or-something
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I've got a job and a 6 year old, I don't have time for this.
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« Reply #393 on: April 05, 2012, 09:59:20 AM »
WORLD SERIES 2012 BITCHES
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« Reply #394 on: April 05, 2012, 09:59:24 AM »
Is this the year?  Where I DON'T get kicked in the nuts?  Pretty sure this is the year.

Better work on my George C. Scott method acting in case things don't pan out.
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Gilgamesh
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« Reply #395 on: April 05, 2012, 09:59:53 AM »
Quote from: thehawk on April 05, 2012, 09:56:17 AM
And its the first Telander Fisking of the season [which really is the only way to read him.

http://deadspin.com/5899317/rick-telander-cubs-president-theo-epstein-might-walk-on-water-this-season-or-something



Jesus Christ, that's masterful.  The first line had me in stitches because of the batshit crazy Telander robot-fear article from last year.
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This is so bad, I'd root for the Orioles over this fucking team, but I can't. Because they're a fucking drug and you can't kick it and they'll never win anything and they'll always suck, but it'll always be sunny at Wrigley and there will be tits and ivy and an old scoreboard and fucking Chads.
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« Reply #396 on: April 05, 2012, 10:02:18 AM »
Quote from: Slaky on April 05, 2012, 09:39:43 AM
I've noticed an abundance of Cub related thoughts and well wishers on the Facebook today.

Huey posted a baseball related song and apparently he has a dickload friend named Craig (not the Sox Craig from softball who is a nice guy) who decided to use Huard's PANKCITEMENT for Opening Day to remind him that the Cubs are shitty and will always be shitty. Real solid friend you have there Huey.

Can I call him a fucking asshole or does he have guns?

Fuck it. I fired the first shot. Slak, pile on any nutpunches as desired. Huey might block me after this though.
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« Reply #397 on: April 05, 2012, 10:11:41 AM »
Quote from: Brownie on April 05, 2012, 10:02:18 AM
Quote from: Slaky on April 05, 2012, 09:39:43 AM
I've noticed an abundance of Cub related thoughts and well wishers on the Facebook today.

Huey posted a baseball related song and apparently he has a dickload friend named Craig (not the Sox Craig from softball who is a nice guy) who decided to use Huard's PANKCITEMENT for Opening Day to remind him that the Cubs are shitty and will always be shitty. Real solid friend you have there Huey.

Can I call him a fucking asshole or does he have guns?

Fuck it. I fired the first shot. Slak, pile on any nutpunches as desired. Huey might block me after this though.

You're unblockable, TJ. If I didn't make it clear - your DirecTV send up was masterful.

And now Huey's friend is going to RUE THE DAY.
« Last Edit: April 05, 2012, 10:18:43 AM by Slaky » Logged
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« Reply #398 on: April 05, 2012, 10:28:41 AM »
Go Heat.
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« Reply #399 on: April 05, 2012, 10:51:54 AM »
This Craig guy is a regular cunt.
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Sterling Archer
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« Reply #400 on: April 05, 2012, 11:09:08 AM »
Yesterday I learned from Deadbird fans on Bookface that winning Opening Day gives the Kyardnuls an automatic 3 - 0 World Series lead.
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« Reply #401 on: April 06, 2012, 09:12:13 AM »
Coming off last year's Alec Baldwin vs. John Krasinski New Era videos, here's this season's: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtxo4BnYzro&feature=player_embedded
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This is so bad, I'd root for the Orioles over this fucking team, but I can't. Because they're a fucking drug and you can't kick it and they'll never win anything and they'll always suck, but it'll always be sunny at Wrigley and there will be tits and ivy and an old scoreboard and fucking Chads.
Sterling Archer
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« Reply #402 on: April 06, 2012, 12:35:04 PM »
Quote from: Gilgamesh on April 06, 2012, 09:12:13 AM
Coming off last year's Alec Baldwin vs. John Krasinski New Era videos, here's this season's: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtxo4BnYzro&feature=player_embedded

Good to see Reg Mackworthy in a Major League cap again.
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Fork
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« Reply #403 on: April 06, 2012, 12:37:03 PM »
Quote from: Sterling Archer on April 06, 2012, 12:35:04 PM
Quote from: Gilgamesh on April 06, 2012, 09:12:13 AM
Coming off last year's Alec Baldwin vs. John Krasinski New Era videos, here's this season's: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtxo4BnYzro&feature=player_embedded

Good to see Reg Mackworthy in a Major League cap again.

The eye healed nicely.
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PANK!
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« Reply #404 on: April 06, 2012, 01:39:54 PM »
Quote from: Slaky on April 05, 2012, 09:39:43 AM
I've noticed an abundance of Cub related thoughts and well wishers on the Facebook today.

Huey posted a baseball related song and apparently he has a dickload friend named Craig (not the Sox Craig from softball who is a nice guy) who decided to use Huard's PANKCITEMENT for Opening Day to remind him that the Cubs are shitty and will always be shitty. Real solid friend you have there Huey.

Can I call him a fucking asshole or does he have guns?

Nah, he's a little twerp from Niles with whom I would occassionally smoke weed at NIU 20+ years ago.  That's the extent of our relationship.  Thank you all for doing the devil's work--you were welcome to pile on, of course, but he proved to be a rather irrepressible, in additon to being an insufferable, troll.
« Last Edit: April 06, 2012, 01:41:26 PM by PANK! » Logged
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