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Author Topic: Twatheads Twittering  (Read 27305 times)
morpheus
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« Reply #480 on: August 18, 2011, 11:54:24 AM »

If you miss TDubbs' reviews of "The Chicago Code" as much as I do, here's your fix.

LSA +1,000,000,000,000,000
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I don't get that KurtEvans photoshop.
Slaky
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« Reply #481 on: August 26, 2011, 01:51:42 PM »

I don't follow many novelty accounts but @DadBoner is consistently one of the best, funniest accounts active.

Here's a quick piece written about it (yes, it's HuffPo): http://www.huffingtonpost.com/aaron-belz/the-literary-tweeter-dadb_b_882726.html

I'd highly recommend everyone follow this account for the lulz. The recent story about getting drunk at a bar full of black dudes is funny even if you're not TDubbs.

Quote
Vernon said it'd be cool if me and Dave met him out at the club later tonight. Never been to the club! Super pumped. Supposed to text me.

Told Dave, if he wants to wear cargo shorts to the club, then he can just stay home. He's embarrassing. Wearin my silk shirt. Heavy cologne.

Can't wait to show off my dance moves. Black folks appreciate the classics like the robot and the worm. Get down. Get funky fresh.

Warmin up with some orange pop & Hennessy. Hear that's what the brothers crave to get pumped for the club. Not so smooth, but when in Rome.

Hennessy kinda tastes like kerosine. The brothers must like the taste from when they'd have to drink kerosine to get buzzed in the old days.

Don't know when Vernon is supposed to "hit me up." Should probably just keep a solid buzz goin all night to be ready whenever.

Dave did a shot of Hennessy. Good luck hurling later. Only full on soul brothers can do that. Honkeys can't handle it full strength.

Don't know if I can face Vernon on Monday, you guys

Alot of brothers have those long hair dread things. From behind they look like caramel honeys with big booties. Disaster.

So, me and Dave drank Hennessy until midnight, when Vernon said to meet us at the club. Black folks start the party late I guess. Like work.

Showed up at the club about 12:30, pretty bombed. Everyone seemed in a me so horny vibe. Got right into it. All black booties look the same.

Vernon said to "get my groove on." Didn't want to disappoint him. "Got busy" on his "homeboy" named "Darryl." So embarrassed.

Dave freaked out, screaming, "KARL IS THIS A BLACK FAG BAR? ARE YOU A FAG FOR BLACKS!?" That's when I puked up Hennessy from a panic attack.

I've pretty much decided I can't bring Dave around my soul brother pals anymore. He needs to learn screaming "BLACK FAG BAR" isn't cool.

Me and Dave got hauled out. The bouncer hit Dave in the stomach for the "black fag" comment. He needed it. What an ass.

"Black fags" or not, you can't call queers "fags" regardless of skin color or whether they're gay or not. It's 2011, you guys.

If anyone is a fag, it's Dave. Not that it's cool to say that. Whenever you feel the need to say "fag," try "jerk." Works just fine.

Sure, I might have puked up orange pop and Hennessy all over Vernon's friend Darryl's back when I dirty danced him, but I ain't a homophobe.

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Internet Apex
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« Reply #482 on: August 26, 2011, 02:09:44 PM »

I don't follow many novelty accounts but @DadBoner is consistently one of the best, funniest accounts active.

Here's a quick piece written about it (yes, it's HuffPo): http://www.huffingtonpost.com/aaron-belz/the-literary-tweeter-dadb_b_882726.html

I'd highly recommend everyone follow this account for the lulz. The recent story about getting drunk at a bar full of black dudes is funny even if you're not TDubbs.

Quote
Vernon said it'd be cool if me and Dave met him out at the club later tonight. Never been to the club! Super pumped. Supposed to text me.

Told Dave, if he wants to wear cargo shorts to the club, then he can just stay home. He's embarrassing. Wearin my silk shirt. Heavy cologne.

Can't wait to show off my dance moves. Black folks appreciate the classics like the robot and the worm. Get down. Get funky fresh.

Warmin up with some orange pop & Hennessy. Hear that's what the brothers crave to get pumped for the club. Not so smooth, but when in Rome.

Hennessy kinda tastes like kerosine. The brothers must like the taste from when they'd have to drink kerosine to get buzzed in the old days.

Don't know when Vernon is supposed to "hit me up." Should probably just keep a solid buzz goin all night to be ready whenever.

Dave did a shot of Hennessy. Good luck hurling later. Only full on soul brothers can do that. Honkeys can't handle it full strength.

Don't know if I can face Vernon on Monday, you guys

Alot of brothers have those long hair dread things. From behind they look like caramel honeys with big booties. Disaster.

So, me and Dave drank Hennessy until midnight, when Vernon said to meet us at the club. Black folks start the party late I guess. Like work.

Showed up at the club about 12:30, pretty bombed. Everyone seemed in a me so horny vibe. Got right into it. All black booties look the same.

Vernon said to "get my groove on." Didn't want to disappoint him. "Got busy" on his "homeboy" named "Darryl." So embarrassed.

Dave freaked out, screaming, "KARL IS THIS A BLACK FAG BAR? ARE YOU A FAG FOR BLACKS!?" That's when I puked up Hennessy from a panic attack.

I've pretty much decided I can't bring Dave around my soul brother pals anymore. He needs to learn screaming "BLACK FAG BAR" isn't cool.

Me and Dave got hauled out. The bouncer hit Dave in the stomach for the "black fag" comment. He needed it. What an ass.

"Black fags" or not, you can't call queers "fags" regardless of skin color or whether they're gay or not. It's 2011, you guys.

If anyone is a fag, it's Dave. Not that it's cool to say that. Whenever you feel the need to say "fag," try "jerk." Works just fine.

Sure, I might have puked up orange pop and Hennessy all over Vernon's friend Darryl's back when I dirty danced him, but I ain't a homophobe.



Holy shit.
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The 37th Tenet of Pexism:  Apestink is terrible.
Gilgamesh
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« Reply #483 on: October 19, 2011, 10:11:18 AM »

TAKE THAT, NBC NEWS SENIOR WHITE HOUSE CORRESPONDENT CHUCK TODD!!!

CHUCK TODD SUCKS...EVIDENCE HERE

BURNED!!
« Last Edit: October 19, 2011, 10:14:04 AM by Gilgamesh » Logged

This is so bad, I'd root for the Orioles over this fucking team, but I can't. Because they're a fucking drug and you can't kick it and they'll never win anything and they'll always suck, but it'll always be sunny at Wrigley and there will be tits and ivy and an old scoreboard and fucking Chads.
Slaky
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« Reply #484 on: October 19, 2011, 01:01:13 PM »

TAKE THAT, NBC NEWS SENIOR WHITE HOUSE CORRESPONDENT CHUCK TODD!!!

CHUCK TODD SUCKS...EVIDENCE HERE

BURNED!!

Nice try - that's clearly Rhys Darby.
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BH
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Hockeenight HR Dept, TJG Assistant Editor


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« Reply #485 on: October 20, 2011, 09:58:06 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?
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Yeti
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« Reply #486 on: October 20, 2011, 09:59:39 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?

@bleedcubbieblue
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Gilgamesh
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« Reply #487 on: October 20, 2011, 10:27:20 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?

@chucktodd
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This is so bad, I'd root for the Orioles over this fucking team, but I can't. Because they're a fucking drug and you can't kick it and they'll never win anything and they'll always suck, but it'll always be sunny at Wrigley and there will be tits and ivy and an old scoreboard and fucking Chads.
Fork
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Posts: 7401


Needs something...


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« Reply #488 on: October 20, 2011, 10:47:58 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?

@SarahSpain
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TIME TO POST!
Slaky
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« Reply #489 on: October 20, 2011, 11:18:43 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?

@SarahSpain

@The1Tab
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Tinker to Evers to Chance
F@#$in' New Guy
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Now there's a haircut you can set your watch to.


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« Reply #490 on: October 20, 2011, 11:29:44 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?

@steverosenbloom
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Validated by Thrillho - Vicinity WG543441 on or about 102345AUG08

I don't get this KurtEvans photoshop at all.
Yeti
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Posts: 2959



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« Reply #491 on: October 20, 2011, 11:35:51 AM »

@JarekWysocki1
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Tinker to Evers to Chance
F@#$in' New Guy
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Posts: 1459


Now there's a haircut you can set your watch to.


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« Reply #492 on: October 20, 2011, 11:39:36 AM »

Who do you guys follow on twitter?

@rotoworld

@Rotoworld_BB

@Rotoworld_FB

@Rotoworld_HK

@Rotoworld_BK
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Validated by Thrillho - Vicinity WG543441 on or about 102345AUG08

I don't get this KurtEvans photoshop at all.
Fork
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« Reply #493 on: October 20, 2011, 12:45:51 PM »


#HawksPGL
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TIME TO POST!
Internet Apex
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« Reply #494 on: October 20, 2011, 12:54:46 PM »

@internetapex
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The 37th Tenet of Pexism:  Apestink is terrible.
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