The only site I'll ever need...

[CBStew]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
 

[Tonker]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
 

Funny you should say that, Stew.  Because just this afternoon, on Bruce Miles' Facebook status, Al Yellon had the following to say about the DH rule in the NL:

"It's inevitable. We don't have two leagues any more; we have year-round interleague play. Time for everyone to play by the same rules."

In not entirely unrelated news, Al Yellon can suck my fucking cock.

[CBStew]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
 

Funny you should say that, Stew.  Because just this afternoon, on Bruce Miles' Facebook status, Al Yellon had the following to say about the DH rule in the NL:

"It's inevitable. We don't have two leagues any more; we have year-round interleague play. Time for everyone to play by the same rules."

In not entirely unrelated news, Al Yellon can suck my fucking cock.

13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.  WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING!?

[flannj]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
 

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

What could possibly go wrong with such a "common sense" commandment.

[Gilgamesh]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
  

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

What could possibly go wrong with such a "common sense" commandment.

"I, The Lord, thy God, shall employ irony whenever possible."

[Eli]

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

Uh huh.

[flannj]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
  

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

What could possibly go wrong with such a "common sense" commandment.

"I, The Lord, thy God, shall employ irony whenever possible."

Doesn't this require some sort of ruling?

[morpheus]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
  

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

What could possibly go wrong with such a "common sense" commandment.

"I, The Lord, thy God, shall employ irony whenever possible."

Doesn't this require some sort of ruling?

Yes.  I'll put up the CT Signal.

[Tonker]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
  

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

What could possibly go wrong with such a "common sense" commandment.

"I, The Lord, thy God, shall employ irony whenever possible."

Doesn't this require some sort of ruling?

Yes.  I'll put up the CT Signal.

Ha!  I haven't seen that before.

[CT III]

(Fork, you can write your own joke about Stew and/or Heston's dead, cold hands here)

They break easily.

Really too bad.  There were some zingers in the lost five:
11.  Thou shalt not eat pork, except for bacon, because it is yummy.
12.  Thou shalt not honor a team on the north side of the city of Chicago, they are an abomination.
13.  Thou shalt not designate a hitter.
14.  Thou shalt not swing at a 3 and 0 pitch with two outs, a tie score and the  bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth.
15.  Thou shalt not adopt a constitutional amendment guarantying the right to bear arms.  That is just stupid.
 
  

The 15th. is my favorite.
Thou shalt not have the means to protect thyself, thy family, thy property.

What could possibly go wrong with such a "common sense" commandment.

"I, The Lord, thy God, shall employ irony whenever possible."

Doesn't this require some sort of ruling?

Irony: DENIED

[Tonker]

I need this picture:



... turned into a picture of a Leprechaun, please.  I feel sure that one of you PShop types can do a job.

First entry to make me LOL gets a hand shandy next time I'm in Chicago.