Theo Epstein Sploosh Thread

[Bort]

From crazy rumor guy.

"Current Padres GM Jed Hoyer is being considered by the Cubs and Epstein, tweets SI's Jon Heyman.  In that scenario, Josh Byrnes would become the Padres' GM.  Heyman notes that the Cubs are also looking at Padres executives Byrnes and Jason McLeod for themselves, should Hoyer stay.  All the executives were once members of the Boston front office with Epstein."

They are going to hire TWO baseball guys?  Terrible, terrible idea.

Surprise!  I have no idea what's going on...I thought Epstein was going to be the GM.  What is this Hoyer guy going to do?

No, Epstein is going to have a swank new title like President, Grand Poobah or Supreme Leader.

"Defender of the Faith."

Lord Protector of the Baseball Realm.

Also known in 2013 as "Who?"

Just the Doctor.

NERD.

[Chuck to Chuck]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

[R-V]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Ah, it's time for another installment of Revisionist History with Chuck!

You see guys, Chuck didn't say that hiring one baseball guy would be a failure.

It was all of us fucking mindreaders who said that hiring two baseball guys was a bad idea.

[Eli]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

[Brownie]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Ah, it's time for another installment of Revisionist History with Chuck!

You see guys, Chuck didn't say that hiring one baseball guy would be a failure.

It was all of us fucking mindreaders who said that hiring two baseball guys was a bad idea.

Link un-Morph'd

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

[Eli]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

[R-V]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

Hanj?

[Slaky]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

Hanj?

Rimj.

[R-V]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

Hanj?

Rimj.

Rimj (no taintj).

[Richard Chuggar]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

Hanj?

Rimj.

Rimj (no taintj).

If you have to ask you can't afford it

[Shooter]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

Hanj?

Rimj.

Couldn't get the taste out of his mouth.

[Internet Apex]

Press conference tomorrow?

And he's bringing Jed Hoyer? Awful, awful that there will be two baseball guys instead of one.

Was anyone saying it would be an awful idea to have two smart baseball guys?

Intrepid Reader: Tom Ricketts

Of course not. What idiot would ever say that?

"I've never bought into the (idea) that I should have a baseball guy to watch my baseball guy and his baseball guys. Then what do you get — a baseball guy to watch the baseball guy who's watching your baseball guys?"

Saying the Cubs don't need two "baseball guys" at the top isn't the same thing as saying it would be an awful idea.

Exactly. I'm sure Ricketts wants to have as many smart "baseball guys" in the front office as possible. But naturally, Chuck chose to spin it as Ricketts saying he would prefer to NOT have it that way.

God damn, Chuck ruins EVERYTHING. I bet he complained about his first heej.

Hanj?

Rimj.

Couldn't get the taste out of his mouth.

Rimsh

I laughed.