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Author Topic: NBA Hoop Thread (Non-Fro Dog Edition)  (Read 6237 times)
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« Reply #105 on: May 07, 2012, 10:02:46 AM »

First Knick playoff win since I ended my fandom. Jeff Van Gundy and I shared yet another lament over Isiah Thomas' reign of horror. It was really cute how they dropped the streamers and partied like it was 1999. Like really, super cute.

The Knicks are like an ex-girlfriend who moved in and threw out all my stuff to make room for her bullshit, made me miserable on a daily basis and capped it off by cheating on me with the sneakiest, smarmiest douchecannon I knew. Freeing myself from her was good for me and as I occaisionally checked in on her while she compounded horrible decisions with even worse choices I felt no remorse at having ended it. But there are days like yesterday when she showed up looking like she did when we first met, when all I wanted was to be next to her and she tantalized me with promises of love, happiness and amazing secks.

But alas. That bitch be crazy. Namaste.

And now you're a Heat fan. Which is presumably like paying to a date a hooker. You convince yourself there's a connection and parade her around to your friends, but everyone knows you didn't do anything to earn it and you're making everyone around you sad.


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« Reply #106 on: May 07, 2012, 10:06:08 AM »

First Knick playoff win since I ended my fandom. Jeff Van Gundy and I shared yet another lament over Isiah Thomas' reign of horror. It was really cute how they dropped the streamers and partied like it was 1999. Like really, super cute.

The Knicks are like an ex-girlfriend who moved in and threw out all my stuff to make room for her bullshit, made me miserable on a daily basis and capped it off by cheating on me with the sneakiest, smarmiest douchecannon I knew. Freeing myself from her was good for me and as I occaisionally checked in on her while she compounded horrible decisions with even worse choices I felt no remorse at having ended it. But there are days like yesterday when she showed up looking like she did when we first met, when all I wanted was to be next to her and she tantalized me with promises of love, happiness and amazing secks.

But alas. That bitch be crazy. Namaste.

And now you're a Heat fan. Which is presumably like paying to a date a hooker. You convince yourself there's a connection and parade her around to your friends, but everyone knows you didn't do anything to earn it and you're making everyone around you sad.


*Like*

That was awesome.
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"Plummer, in 1999, "contributed" 1,017 fewer yards to the Cardinals than the league average QB would have brought to the table. As far as modern seasons go, Plummer's '99 stands as the worst."
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« Reply #107 on: May 07, 2012, 10:12:24 AM »

First Knick playoff win since I ended my fandom. Jeff Van Gundy and I shared yet another lament over Isiah Thomas' reign of horror. It was really cute how they dropped the streamers and partied like it was 1999. Like really, super cute.

The Knicks are like an ex-girlfriend who moved in and threw out all my stuff to make room for her bullshit, made me miserable on a daily basis and capped it off by cheating on me with the sneakiest, smarmiest douchecannon I knew. Freeing myself from her was good for me and as I occaisionally checked in on her while she compounded horrible decisions with even worse choices I felt no remorse at having ended it. But there are days like yesterday when she showed up looking like she did when we first met, when all I wanted was to be next to her and she tantalized me with promises of love, happiness and amazing secks.

But alas. That bitch be crazy. Namaste.

And now you're a Heat fan. Which is presumably like paying to a date a hooker. You convince yourself there's a connection and parade her around to your friends, but everyone knows you didn't do anything to earn it and you're making everyone around you sad.


*Like*

That was awesome.

I laughed.
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« Reply #108 on: May 07, 2012, 11:08:08 AM »

First Knick playoff win since I ended my fandom. Jeff Van Gundy and I shared yet another lament over Isiah Thomas' reign of horror. It was really cute how they dropped the streamers and partied like it was 1999. Like really, super cute.

The Knicks are like an ex-girlfriend who moved in and threw out all my stuff to make room for her bullshit, made me miserable on a daily basis and capped it off by cheating on me with the sneakiest, smarmiest douchecannon I knew. Freeing myself from her was good for me and as I occaisionally checked in on her while she compounded horrible decisions with even worse choices I felt no remorse at having ended it. But there are days like yesterday when she showed up looking like she did when we first met, when all I wanted was to be next to her and she tantalized me with promises of love, happiness and amazing secks.

But alas. That bitch be crazy. Namaste.

Have you registered cantheheatmendmybrokenheart.com yet?
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« Reply #109 on: May 07, 2012, 11:19:44 AM »

First Knick playoff win since I ended my fandom. Jeff Van Gundy and I shared yet another lament over Isiah Thomas' reign of horror. It was really cute how they dropped the streamers and partied like it was 1999. Like really, super cute.

The Knicks are like an ex-girlfriend who moved in and threw out all my stuff to make room for her bullshit, made me miserable on a daily basis and capped it off by cheating on me with the sneakiest, smarmiest douchecannon I knew. Freeing myself from her was good for me and as I occaisionally checked in on her while she compounded horrible decisions with even worse choices I felt no remorse at having ended it. But there are days like yesterday when she showed up looking like she did when we first met, when all I wanted was to be next to her and she tantalized me with promises of love, happiness and amazing secks.

But alas. That bitch be crazy. Namaste.

Have you registered cantheheatmendmybrokenheart.com yet?

It's a pay site. So no.
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« Reply #110 on: May 09, 2012, 12:35:51 AM »

That was the worst game of playoff basketball since the breaking of the color barrier. If Boozer keeps shooting like that, they're just going to have to guard him. That's all there is to it.
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« Reply #111 on: May 09, 2012, 07:24:12 AM »

That was the worst game of playoff basketball since the breaking of the color barrier. If Boozer keeps shooting like that, they're just going to have to guard him. That's all there is to it.

So you think that a playoff game between a #8 seed and a team with two of its best players not playing would be a thing of beauty?  It's almost like you'd look at yourself in the mirror and instead of seeing a dorky white hillrod from Turdville, Indiana, you'd see a black kid that can rap.
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« Reply #112 on: May 09, 2012, 08:09:16 AM »

The Sixers are terrible.
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« Reply #113 on: May 09, 2012, 10:57:56 AM »

That was the worst game of playoff basketball since the breaking of the color barrier. If Boozer keeps shooting like that, they're just going to have to guard him. That's all there is to it.

So you think that a playoff game between a #8 seed and a team with two of its best players not playing would be a thing of beauty?  It's almost like you'd look at yourself in the mirror and instead of seeing a dorky white hillrod from Turdville, Indiana, you'd see a black kid that can rap.

And when you look in the mirror do you see something other than a hairlipped dwarf with a nine-head looking back at you? Because you'd be dreaming if you did.
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« Reply #114 on: May 09, 2012, 01:45:11 PM »

That was the worst game of playoff basketball since the breaking of the color barrier. If Boozer keeps shooting like that, they're just going to have to guard him. That's all there is to it. the late 90s when defenses were so locked down that viewing a white Bronco drving through aftenoon Southern California traffic was preferrable to an NBA Finals game
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« Reply #115 on: May 09, 2012, 03:09:17 PM »

That was the worst game of playoff basketball since the breaking of the color barrier. If Boozer keeps shooting like that, they're just going to have to guard him. That's all there is to it.

So you think that a playoff game between a #8 seed and a team with two of its best players not playing would be a thing of beauty?  It's almost like you'd look at yourself in the mirror and instead of seeing a dorky white hillrod from Turdville, Indiana, you'd see a black kid that can rap.

And when you look in the mirror do you see something other than a hairlipped dwarf with a nine-head looking back at you? Because you'd be dreaming if you did.

I've always thought it was cruel to point out the hairlip.
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« Reply #116 on: May 09, 2012, 04:29:33 PM »

That was the worst game of playoff basketball since the breaking of the color barrier. If Boozer keeps shooting like that, they're just going to have to guard him. That's all there is to it.

So you think that a playoff game between a #8 seed and a team with two of its best players not playing would be a thing of beauty?  It's almost like you'd look at yourself in the mirror and instead of seeing a dorky white hillrod from Turdville, Indiana, you'd see a black kid that can rap.

And when you look in the mirror do you see something other than a hairlipped dwarf with a nine-head looking back at you? Because you'd be dreaming if you did.

I've always thought it was cruel to point out the hairlip.

Yeah but...Dubbs.
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« Reply #117 on: May 10, 2012, 08:48:04 PM »

Wow, that was terrible.
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« Reply #118 on: May 10, 2012, 11:30:49 PM »

Wow, that was terrible.

Which part--the 2.5 hour bricklayer union convention, or just that dopey tall foreign (I assume) white guy who failed to drop at least 1 free throw which may have made things interesting?
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« Reply #119 on: May 11, 2012, 08:51:26 AM »

Wow, that was terrible.

Which part--the 2.5 hour bricklayer union convention, or just that dopey tall foreign (I assume) white guy who failed to drop at least 1 free throw which may have made things interesting?

Did you really not know Omer is from Turkey?
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