Bearbonnais 2012: Emstink is Wonderful.

[Waco Kid]

Cutler, Marshall, Jeffery right down the field. Bonertime.

[SKO]

Preseason. Preseason. PreseOH SHIT DID YOU SEE THAT? SUPER BEARS

[morpheus]

ARI QUEEMS!!!!!

[PANK!]

Preseason. Preseason. PreseOH SHIT DID YOU SEE THAT? SUPER BEARS

Those first two TD drives were a delicious sampling of what should be the finest offensive buffet in the history of this franchise.

[Internet Apex]

I know it's ONLY PRESEASON but in all seriousness, where do you think Alshon Jeffery ranks on the all-time list of Bears wideouts? I have him third behind Brandon Marshall and Dennis McKinnon. But it's only preseason. That could change slightly.

[Slaky]

I know it's ONLY PRESEASON but in all seriousness, where do you think Alshon Jeffery ranks on the all-time list of Bears wideouts? I have him third behind Brandon Marshall and Dennis McKinnon. But it's only preseason. That could change slightly.

This Emstink guy sure knows how to pick em.

[SKO]

I know it's ONLY PRESEASON but in all seriousness, where do you think Alshon Jeffery ranks on the all-time list of Bears wideouts? I have him third behind Brandon Marshall and Dennis McKinnon. But it's only preseason. That could change slightly.

The list is Jeff Graham and no one else.

[CBStew]

Deadspin's Drew Magary is doing a series tearing apart each NFL team.  Most of the articles have been overdone.  But today's critique of the Bears, in my opinion, is pretty accurate.

http://deadspin.com/5935713/why-your-team-sucks-2012-chicago-bears

[thehawk]

Deadspin's Drew Magary is doing a series tearing apart each NFL team.  Most of the articles have been overdone.  But today's critique of the Bears, in my opinion, is pretty accurate.

http://deadspin.com/5935713/why-your-team-sucks-2012-chicago-bears

I thought it was pretty good as well, other than the 'how can you root for Jay Utler?' section.  Becuase I'm finding that rooting for the 'anti-Farve' is kind of fung....

[CBStew]

Deadspin's Drew Magary is doing a series tearing apart each NFL team.  Most of the articles have been overdone.  But today's critique of the Bears, in my opinion, is pretty accurate.

http://deadspin.com/5935713/why-your-team-sucks-2012-chicago-bears

I thought it was pretty good as well, other than the 'how can you root for Jay Utler?' section.  Becuase I'm finding that rooting for the 'anti-Farve' is kind of fung....

Did you read the sidebar  "Jay Cutler Is A Housecat?"   I think that Magary nailed it.

[PenPho]

Deadspin's Drew Magary is doing a series tearing apart each NFL team.  Most of the articles have been overdone.  But today's critique of the Bears, in my opinion, is pretty accurate.

http://deadspin.com/5935713/why-your-team-sucks-2012-chicago-bears

I thought it was pretty good as well, other than the 'how can you root for Jay Utler?' section.  Becuase I'm finding that rooting for the 'anti-Farve' is kind of fung....

There's a ton of the same-old "DA BEARS! 1985!" stupid stuff, but this was pretty legit:

Despite having an OL that has given up the most sacks in the NFL over the last two seasons (105) we selected zero OL in the draft. ZERO! And don't think that's because we picked up a stud OL via free agency because that didn't happen either. And get this: Mike Tice, the OL coach responsible for the worst OL in football the past two years, just got PROMOTED to Offensive Coordinator. You can't make this shit up.

Granted, you can pin a bunch of that on Angelo, but still...that's funny.  

Also, I don't know which one of you wrote this (it's about 5000 words too few for SKO, so I assume it was someone else):

1. This is a fan base that wanted to run the first decent QB we have had since WW2 out of town because he couldn't come back into the NFC Championship Game after he shredded his MCL. I guess Jay Cutler permanently injuring his knee while being completely ineffective would have been worth it in order for Cutler to prove he is "Chicago tough". They then clamored for Caleb Hanie to get a shot at the starting QB job (I'll give you a minute to let that sink in). Then turned around and complained about how bad Hanie was last year and wondered why anyone would put him on an NFL roster.

Also, totally accurate.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

There's a ton of the same-old "DA BEARS! 1985!" stupid stuff, but this was pretty legit:

Despite having an OL that has given up the most sacks in the NFL over the last two seasons (105) we selected zero OL in the draft. ZERO! And don't think that's because we picked up a stud OL via free agency because that didn't happen either. And get this: Mike Tice, the OL coach responsible for the worst OL in football the past two years, just got PROMOTED to Offensive Coordinator. You can't make this shit up.

Granted, you can pin a bunch of that on Angelo, but still...that's funny.

THE BEARS O-LINE IS A SHIT SANDWICH. AND MIKE TICE FAILED TO MAKE THIS SHIT SANDWICH HE WAS HANDED TASTE LIKE HONEY-GLAZED BACON. WHAT A BUM!

Also, I don't know which one of you wrote this (it's about 5000 words too few for SKO, so I assume it was someone else):

1. This is a fan base that wanted to run the first decent QB we have had since WW2 out of town because he couldn't come back into the NFC Championship Game after he shredded his MCL. I guess Jay Cutler permanently injuring his knee while being completely ineffective would have been worth it in order for Cutler to prove he is "Chicago tough". They then clamored for Caleb Hanie to get a shot at the starting QB job (I'll give you a minute to let that sink in). Then turned around and complained about how bad Hanie was last year and wondered why anyone would put him on an NFL roster.

Also, totally accurate.

Funny, depressingly accurate and oddly out of place in a post about why the Bears suck.

[PANK!]

Every time I hear Ditka speak, I become convinced that the 1985 Bears were really coached by Buddy Ryan and a rotating group of drunken team captains. Ditka is a fucking buttsteak, and it galls me to think that he serves as a kind of unofficial ambassador for the city of Chicago. It's one of the greatest cities in the world, and here's Andy Reid's drunk uncle representing it. He's less a football legend than a hilarious caricature of one.

A thousand times THI.  

May the next 5 years blow DA '85 BEARSE permanently off the map.  

[SKO]

There's a ton of the same-old "DA BEARS! 1985!" stupid stuff, but this was pretty legit:

Despite having an OL that has given up the most sacks in the NFL over the last two seasons (105) we selected zero OL in the draft. ZERO! And don't think that's because we picked up a stud OL via free agency because that didn't happen either. And get this: Mike Tice, the OL coach responsible for the worst OL in football the past two years, just got PROMOTED to Offensive Coordinator. You can't make this shit up.

Granted, you can pin a bunch of that on Angelo, but still...that's funny.

THE BEARS O-LINE IS A SHIT SANDWICH. AND MIKE TICE FAILED TO MAKE THIS SHIT SANDWICH HE WAS HANDED TASTE LIKE HONEY-GLAZED BACON. WHAT A BUM!

Also, I don't know which one of you wrote this (it's about 5000 words too few for SKO, so I assume it was someone else):

1. This is a fan base that wanted to run the first decent QB we have had since WW2 out of town because he couldn't come back into the NFC Championship Game after he shredded his MCL. I guess Jay Cutler permanently injuring his knee while being completely ineffective would have been worth it in order for Cutler to prove he is "Chicago tough". They then clamored for Caleb Hanie to get a shot at the starting QB job (I'll give you a minute to let that sink in). Then turned around and complained about how bad Hanie was last year and wondered why anyone would put him on an NFL roster.

Also, totally accurate.

Funny, depressingly accurate and oddly out of place in a post about why the Bears suck.

Also, it couldn't be me because all I ever do when Bears fans bitch about not addressing the o-line in the draft is point out that they spent a first round pick on a tackle last year. One who played two games. But shit, might as well give up on him and draft another right tackle because, as usual, there's not a LT left at their spot in the draft order.

[Internet Apex]

Hub was on the Score yesterday telling B&B that Hester should not be playing receiver and that if anyone else returns a punt or kickoff this year it's a travesty of coaching. I disagree with this completely and believe that Hester will prove extremely valuable in the passing game once teams have to spend all their energy stopping Marshall and Forte. I have no empirical evidence to support my staunch belief in Devin Hester and Lovie Smith has human beings. But I have my asshurt. And that's quite a thing.