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Author Topic: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread  ( 138,468 )

Eli

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #330 on: August 17, 2014, 07:35:55 PM »
Quote from: Sterling Archer on August 17, 2014, 01:28:54 PM
Quote from: Eli on August 17, 2014, 12:32:01 PM
Quote from: Slaky on August 17, 2014, 12:08:38 PM
Quote from: Oleg on August 17, 2014, 11:59:45 AM
DOOOOOM.

He isn't coming up this year and their season is two weeks from being over plus playoffs. Sit him down. Who cares.

At least it's not his wrist or hand.

Now they can cite missed development time as a reason to keep him down to start next season.

How do we know Theo didn't sneak into his room while he was sleeping and break his toe with a hammer?  Does Bryant's apartment complex have surveillance footage?

We don't know that. I think we have to assume he did, actually, until he proves otherwise.

Saul Goodman

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #331 on: August 17, 2014, 08:14:05 PM »
Quote from: Eli on August 17, 2014, 07:35:55 PM
Quote from: Sterling Archer on August 17, 2014, 01:28:54 PM
Quote from: Eli on August 17, 2014, 12:32:01 PM
Quote from: Slaky on August 17, 2014, 12:08:38 PM
Quote from: Oleg on August 17, 2014, 11:59:45 AM
DOOOOOM.

He isn't coming up this year and their season is two weeks from being over plus playoffs. Sit him down. Who cares.

At least it's not his wrist or hand.

Now they can cite missed development time as a reason to keep him down to start next season.

How do we know Theo didn't sneak into his room while he was sleeping and break his toe with a hammer?  Does Bryant's apartment complex have surveillance footage?

We don't know that. I think we have to assume he did, actually, until he proves otherwise.

Agreed.  I for one am glad Theo will stop at nothing to win.  Edwin Jackson had better invest in a really great lock.
You two wanna go stick your wangs in a hornet's nest, it's a free country.  But how come I always gotta get sloppy seconds, huh?

Quality Start Machine

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #332 on: August 17, 2014, 09:49:55 PM »
Quote from: Sterling Archer on August 17, 2014, 01:28:54 PM
Quote from: Eli on August 17, 2014, 12:32:01 PM
Quote from: Slaky on August 17, 2014, 12:08:38 PM
Quote from: Oleg on August 17, 2014, 11:59:45 AM
DOOOOOM.

He isn't coming up this year and their season is two weeks from being over plus playoffs. Sit him down. Who cares.

At least it's not his wrist or hand.

Now they can cite missed development time as a reason to keep him down to start next season.

How do we know Theo didn't sneak into his room while he was sleeping and break his toe with a hammer?  Does Bryant's apartment complex have surveillance footage?

I'm pretty sure IAN has cameras mounted there.
TIME TO POST!

"...their lead is no longer even remotely close to insurmountable " - SKO, 7/31/16

CBStew

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #333 on: September 04, 2014, 12:51:27 PM »
I am shocked, SHOCKED, I tell you, to read that Scot Boras thinks that the Cubs should call up Kris Bryant.
If I had known that I was going to live this long I would have taken better care of myself.   (Plagerized from numerous other folks)

Quality Start Machine

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #334 on: February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM »
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.
TIME TO POST!

"...their lead is no longer even remotely close to insurmountable " - SKO, 7/31/16

InternetApex

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #335 on: February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM »
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 
The 39th Tenet of Pexism: True in the game as long as blood is blue in my vein.

Quality Start Machine

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #336 on: February 25, 2015, 11:18:11 AM »
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

Russell will cause Castro to move. I don't think he has any bearing on Bryant.

For the record, Olt has no bearing on anything Bryant-related either. I just like joking about Mike Olt and how I once thought he could be like Jim Presley. I was so young and foolish then.
TIME TO POST!

"...their lead is no longer even remotely close to insurmountable " - SKO, 7/31/16

Saul Goodman

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #337 on: February 25, 2015, 11:19:56 AM »
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

That would change everything, now they don't have to trade DANVO GELBOCK.
You two wanna go stick your wangs in a hornet's nest, it's a free country.  But how come I always gotta get sloppy seconds, huh?

InternetApex

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #338 on: February 25, 2015, 11:24:28 AM »
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 11:18:11 AM
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

Russell will cause Castro to move. I don't think he has any bearing on Bryant.

For the record, Olt has no bearing on anything Bryant-related either. I just like joking about Mike Olt and how I once thought he could be like Jim Presley. I was so young and foolish then.

Castro has the better arm. Neither guy hits for a ton of power. Russell seems like a natural fit at 2nd or CF.

I have no idea what's going to happen but I see so many good options that don't involve trading for some cunt pitcher that get me really excited.
The 39th Tenet of Pexism: True in the game as long as blood is blue in my vein.

Eli

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #339 on: February 25, 2015, 11:36:11 AM »
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 11:18:11 AM
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

Russell will cause Castro to move. I don't think he has any bearing on Bryant.

For the record, Olt has no bearing on anything Bryant-related either. I just like joking about Mike Olt and how I once thought he could be like Jim Presley. I was so young and foolish then.

I think Russell could potentially wind up at third. Coming out of high school, he was bulkier and most scouts figured that's where he would end up anyway. But he lost some weight to stick at short, so it might be an easy transition to bulk up to add some power and then just slide over.

Oleg

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #340 on: February 26, 2015, 10:51:36 AM »
Quote from: Eli on February 25, 2015, 11:36:11 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 11:18:11 AM
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

Russell will cause Castro to move. I don't think he has any bearing on Bryant.

For the record, Olt has no bearing on anything Bryant-related either. I just like joking about Mike Olt and how I once thought he could be like Jim Presley. I was so young and foolish then.

I think Russell could potentially wind up at third. Coming out of high school, he was bulkier and most scouts figured that's where he would end up anyway. But he lost some weight to stick at short, so it might be an easy transition to bulk up to add some power and then just slide over.

The one thing I got from watching 20 hours per week of MLB Network this winter is that Russell doesn't have the arm to play 3B.  It was mentioned on all the top prospect shows that were done (BA and MLB).  It was also mentioned in the BP top prospects rundown on the site.   But, whatever.  I'm not convinced that Bryant isn't sticking at 3B.

Also, I have developed a white hot hatred for Chris Russo.  He's the baseball equivalent of Screamin' Stephen Smith.

InternetApex

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #341 on: February 26, 2015, 11:32:48 AM »
Quote from: Oleg on February 26, 2015, 10:51:36 AM
Quote from: Eli on February 25, 2015, 11:36:11 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 11:18:11 AM
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

Russell will cause Castro to move. I don't think he has any bearing on Bryant.

For the record, Olt has no bearing on anything Bryant-related either. I just like joking about Mike Olt and how I once thought he could be like Jim Presley. I was so young and foolish then.

I think Russell could potentially wind up at third. Coming out of high school, he was bulkier and most scouts figured that's where he would end up anyway. But he lost some weight to stick at short, so it might be an easy transition to bulk up to add some power and then just slide over.

The one thing I got from watching 20 hours per week of MLB Network this winter is that Russell doesn't have the arm to play 3B.  It was mentioned on all the top prospect shows that were done (BA and MLB).  It was also mentioned in the BP top prospects rundown on the site.   But, whatever.  I'm not convinced that Bryant isn't sticking at 3B.

Also, I have developed a white hot hatred for Chris Russo.  He's the baseball equivalent of Screamin' Stephen Smith.

ALL OF THI

I've never watched one second of that Russo show but his commercials make me want to quit life.
The 39th Tenet of Pexism: True in the game as long as blood is blue in my vein.

Quality Start Machine

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #342 on: February 26, 2015, 11:52:28 AM »
Quote from: Oleg on February 26, 2015, 10:51:36 AM
Quote from: Eli on February 25, 2015, 11:36:11 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 11:18:11 AM
Quote from: InternetApex on February 25, 2015, 09:54:10 AM
Quote from: Fork on February 25, 2015, 09:46:51 AM
This is to prepare you for full immersion into the MIKE OLT! experience.

You misspelled Addison Russell but yeah. I remember how a couple of years ago I would achieve full-on pulsating asshurt at the idea of the DH coming to the NL. Now I want that rule changed as soon as Kyle Schwarber is ready begin Babe Fucking Ruthage in the bigs. 

Russell will cause Castro to move. I don't think he has any bearing on Bryant.

For the record, Olt has no bearing on anything Bryant-related either. I just like joking about Mike Olt and how I once thought he could be like Jim Presley. I was so young and foolish then.

I think Russell could potentially wind up at third. Coming out of high school, he was bulkier and most scouts figured that's where he would end up anyway. But he lost some weight to stick at short, so it might be an easy transition to bulk up to add some power and then just slide over.

The one thing I got from watching 20 hours per week of MLB Network this winter is that Russell doesn't have the arm to play 3B.  It was mentioned on all the top prospect shows that were done (BA and MLB).  It was also mentioned in the BP top prospects rundown on the site.   But, whatever.  I'm not convinced that Bryant isn't sticking at 3B.

Also, I have developed a white hot hatred for Chris Russo.  He's the baseball equivalent of Screamin' Stephen Smith.

20 hours a week, but you were probably baked for most/all of it.
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Eli

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #343 on: February 26, 2015, 12:09:24 PM »
Quote from: Oleg on February 26, 2015, 10:51:36 AM
The one thing I got from watching 20 hours per week of MLB Network this winter is that Russell doesn't have the arm to play 3B.

Really? Most scouting reports I've seen on Russell rate his arm somewhere between above-average or plus. And while 3B might require a slightly stronger arm than short, I don't think the difference is all that significant. But if Baez fits better at 3B than Russell, that's fine. I still don't see Bryant sticking at third for more than 3-4 years, if at all. Especially if he can be a good defender in left field, as a lot of people have said.

SKO

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Re: Kris Bryant Firehose of Splooge Thread
« Reply #344 on: February 26, 2015, 12:12:22 PM »
Quote from: Eli on February 26, 2015, 12:09:24 PM
Quote from: Oleg on February 26, 2015, 10:51:36 AM
The one thing I got from watching 20 hours per week of MLB Network this winter is that Russell doesn't have the arm to play 3B. 

Really? Most scouting reports I've seen on Russell rate his arm somewhere between above-average or plus. And while 3B might require a slightly stronger arm than short, I don't think the difference is all that significant.

Yeah. I also don't know where Apex got the idea that he doesn't have much power, what with the .515 slugging % and 13 homers in just 68 games last year.

Stop telling insidious lies about Addison Russell, you twits.
I will vow, for the sake of peace, not to complain about David Ross between now and his first start next year- 10/26/2015