The Bears were not good yesterday.
Lovie channeled his inner Dusty Baker yesterday and left Cedric Benson wilting on the bench in what was, in reality, a blowout.
Did I not tell everybody that Doug Brien was lousy? If I know it, you’d think guys who get paid for this kind of stuff would.
Corey made a big catch yesterday! He actually made a tough play into a nearly impossible one with yet another bad route. But unlike Friday’s routine play that he botched, and the Morgan Ensberg “triple” on Saturday that involved him falling down and nearly drowning on the warning track, he caught this one.
Jeromy Burnitz should fire his agent. Why would you negotiate a deal with a $7 million option that you know won’t get picked up? Say the Cubs’ option for Burnitz was $4.5 for next year like it was this year, don’t you think the Cubs would be awfully tempted to keep him? I’m glad it’s seven because as good as Jeromy was “better than feared, not as good as hoped” he’s too old and doesn’t hit enough to be the right fielder this team needs.
Mariotti puts down the doughnut to blame anybody who’s ever worked or played for the Bears.
Ozzie’s setting his sights really high. He’s hoping to go 2-5 to finish the season.
Peter King’s Monday Morning QB says the Patriots are good. Wow.
Midway through this column Ken Rosenthal lays out a plan to fix the Cubs. He says they need to buy Brian Giles and Rafael Furcal. I’d go for that. Even if Ken doesn’t back up his claim that Furcal will give the Cubs’ a real lead off man with information about his on base average. Hint: It’s good, not great. Like .346. But what if you signed those guys and traded for what should be a rebound season from Juan Pierre, or even a one-year stopgap of hopefully Kenny Lofton’s last good year? Hmm.
As for Nomar? I think we saw the end, regardless of what I wrote two weeks ago, on a play in Saturday’s loss to Houston. With the bases loaded and two outs, Nomar fielded a ball just behind the third base bag. He took two steps toward the bag then instead fired, late, to first. Bob Brenly said it all when he said, “Nomar didn’t think he could beat Berkman to the bag.”
Berkman.
Lance Berkman?
260 pound Lumberin’ Lance?
By the way, he’d have beaten him by five steps, but the fact Nomar didn’t think he would have spoke volumes.
America’s finest news source says that people are becoming concerned about the growing trend of teenagers’ “hanging out.”
I missed 79 games last year and 58 this year. Don’t ruin the good memories of my uncharacteristically healthy 2003. I’d play about 50 games if I was signed by the Cubs.
Does anybody remember when I used to mean something?
“Gus Johnson watched Jimmy Smith go out of bounds on the two yard line, watched the referee waive his arms and signal the ball down at the two and kept yelling, “Touchdown Jaguars!†”
Uh… didn’t the Jags score a touchdown on that play?
I scored, but he’s right that the refs originally tried to spot the ball at the two. I didn’t hear the call, but if Gus kept yelling “touchdown” he’d have needed some sort of trivial psychic ability.
Chuck–
The play had to be reviewed first. The second offical “claimed’ he saw Smith go out of bounds, overruling the offical who ruled it a touchdown.
The second offical also apparently was told to burn down the east grandstands at the behest of his imaginary leprechaun.
I think the Packers are afraid to use the strategy of letting the other team score with a one point lead since I screwed up the math when I called for it in our Super Bowl loss to Denver. I did it in a tie game. Oops.
Hey Grady,
If you ever need to borrow my sunglasses, they’re on my hat!
Does this mean you guys don’t hate me? Can I start when I come back…please?
I am the white Jerome Walton.
Does anyone remember when I meant anything?
I was ripping Gus for taking so long to realize the refs hadn’t ruled it a TD.
And Grady, if you’re white Jerome Walton, then I must have blocked out all memory of Jerome being really, really good.
Grady leads the American league with 20 three hit games, and here are his September numbers.
ba .340
oba .415
slg. .649
ops 1.064
seven homers, six doubles and a triple
15 rbi
All while batting leadoff.
Grady Sizemore can’t hold my jock!!
… Damn, Chuck’s right this time. Gus Johnson should be applauded, not ripped, for calling the play accurately. The referee himself probably would have applauded Gus had he not waived his arms, as if they were Mike Remlinger.
Yup, put me in the Hall of Fame. Just like Jody Gerut and Rocco Baldelli, I’m a can’t miss guy.
Remember when Steve Stone and the like compared Rocco Balldelli to me? How’s that working out?
2005, Joe Crede: ba .254, oba .305, slg .455
2005, Grady Sizemore: ba .296, oba .355, slg .498
One of these players cannot hold the other’s jock. I leave it to you, Joe, to figure out which is which.
I know you’re joking, but you are right. Crede has been the most clutch hitter in Chicago, he’s the best defensive 3rd sacker in the game, and he’s got hustle. You know, he’s the opposite of Aramis.
#17, see #16.
Last I checked, I’m not a third baseman. Crede is more clutch than I am, and a better fielder. He’s usually a better hitter, but it’s an off year for him. Except this year, he only gets hits that MATTER. I’ll be watching the Sox celebrate their division championship on my field in a few days anyway.
I was amazed that you didnt rip Korey for refusing to see a sports shrink, BUT, that article (in the online Tribune this morning) has now mysteriously vanished from the site. Wish I would have saved it. I thought he doesnt want to do winter ball or anything else the Cubs want him to do, so I really hope that this selfish a-hole is traded in the offseason.
Why do I have to hear about this through the media? Why wouldn’t the Cubs come to me first to mention seeing a psychologist?
2005, Joe Crede: ba .254, oba .305, slg .455
career, Joe Crede: ba .255, oba .304, slg .439
Yeah, it’s a real off year for Joe. And I’d be careful about planning that division championship celebration… you might as well plan your “It’s been a nice year, too bad about our first-round loss” celebration while you’re at it.
Now, don’t you have a GED class or something to go see about? Pay careful attention during the “elementary statistics” part, you might learn something useful.
Um, 22, the sox just beat us pretty soundly. We gave up about a month ago, and aren’t that good anyway. We’re last in the league in runs, frankly, wwithout KC and Detroit, we ain’t even near .500. As far as the Tigers, they are awful. They might score 17 one game, and then go 5 consecutive games scoring 3 or less. That’s why their stats even look okay on offense. Truth is, you’re right, beating us and the Tigers doesn’t make you great, or even good, at this point. We both gave up long ago, and we stink on ice anyway.
But Hawk says I’m good.
You mean, we’re not good tests for playoff bound teams?
I’m not actually sure I’m white. Have you seen me with my hat off? I might be like a quarter-black or something. Same with Travis Hafner.
Actually, I think I’m a quarter mongoloid.
Gus Johnson didn’t notice the officials were not giving Jimmy the touchdown. CBS had a camera zoomed in on them putting the ball at the two and Smith waving at them frantically in protest and Gus was still screaming “Touchdown Jaguars!”
I was sitting there watching, wondering “What is Gus doing right now that he’s not actually looking at the field?” I came up with:
– Making himself a postgame sandwich
– Primping in front of a mirror in case he got to do a little postgame interview
– Screaming so loudly his eyes were closed
I think the third one is the winner.
Hey Twins (#23) … I agree with you. I was trying to help #19 learn a few things.
I’m just gonna come out and say it…I love bar skanks.
Oh, and #25 is the perfect definition of our Cubs.
Me dead!
I was the fucking tits. Great show if there ever was one.
Wait Wait Wait –
How in the heck could GB have forced overtime last week vs the Browns? After Heiden’s 60-yd TD, the Browns went up by 9.
Green Bay came back and scored a TD they otherwise wouldn’t have – no argument about that – but that cut the lead to two and then only had 0:04 to catch an onside kick and launch a Hail Mary with the intent of a TD or a defensive pass interference penalty deep enough to set up a potential game-winning FG.
Speaking of Don Adams,
If Sloth’s blog had been around during the first Nixon Adminstration, I’d have made his All-Majestic. Agent 99 was the bomb.
If I fall down and don’t score in Green Bay, the game’s over and Green Bay can’t score the last TD or have enough time for an onside kick.
Um, Todd, we all know you love bar skanks, but that time in San Diego might have been the first time you’ve ever hidden from a camera in your life!
If that camera had me, Todd would have faced it.
Barbara:
The bomb or Nude Bomb?
Reality Police is right. And so is Steve Heiden. I knew there was a Green Bay advantage to him scoring, but I didn’t go back and confirm it. It’s my Phil Rogers moment of the day.
Andy,
You’re about me from being in dumbass Phil’s sphere.
As I was running late for work this morning, I left my normal public-transport “reading material” at home. Furthermore, it being school holiday time, there are no 16 year old girls to surreptitiously look at. So, faced with a 45 minute anti-boredom endurance contest, I did the only possible thing and looked into my briefcase for some mind-occupying substances among the retinue of miscellaneous documents that live in such places.
And here was lucky enough to find print-outs of Desipio’s Award-Winning NFL Season previews from a few weeks ago. So it was with much pleasure that I re-read them – taking the entire trip – and enjoying myself immensely. They’re gold.
Thankyou Andy.
We lost yesterday’s game…big time
#42: YOU SUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!
I AM THE BOMB!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oops.
C’mon coach, Benson, my name’s Benson, it must be on the roster.
Yes, No. 43 I lost big time… to Philadelphia. My brother Ron is the guy to blame for the shitty offense!
Anybody else get the feeling that I’ve been living off that Randy Moss interception from 2003?
A couple more shit-tastic games like Sunday, and y’all won’t be able to tell me apart from Lemuel Stinson
OVER RATED! Clap. Clap. Clapclapclap.
Hey Tillman, you suck.
Hey, dudes. Sup?
Am I too late for this party?
BTW- Jeremy Lincoln. WOW. What a catch.
Anybody remember my lousy ass?
Yes Richard, unfortunately we do remember you.
What’s up guys.
One of the funniest things Buddy Ryan ever said was when he said that “LA” stood for “Lazy Ass”.
In addition to being the one weak link on the ’85 defense, I’m also evidently retarded. Friggin’ Reggie Phillips is still cashing in on the ’85 Bears and, even though I was a starter, I prefer to stay the hell away from that team. It’s the simplest cash cow going, but I’m M.I.A.
Remember me? No. Didn’t think so.
You couldn’t hold my jock Mike.
Shutup Frazier or I’ll also put an end to your coaching career.
A reverse? Isn’t the lead big enough? Oh well…what’s the worst that can happen?
So we’re left dregging up mediocre cornerbacks from the past, I guess.
Anybody old enough to remember Rueben Henderson?
I’m about halfway through John Mullin’s new book on the ’85 Bears. It does a pretty good job of highlighting the building process of the early ’80s, and I’m sure will discuss how they didn’t win more than the one Super Bowl and how they fell apart.
I have a no-hitter through 4 this afternoon, boys.
Never mind. I am now self-destructing. You’re welcome, Ozzie!
Damn you Ortiz, you Dominican f$@#!. 3-1 Red Sox.
I play for Notre Dame. My name gets to haunt Andy’s past and present.
OK, I’ve gone 6, the Bosox lead 3-1. A win makes things a lot more interesting for the White Sox.
You want interesting? Last night Konerko banged 3 fat Polish groupies on the trainer’s table, while Crash Rownad watched and beat off using Icy Hot, all the while yelling “feel the burn Paulie, feel it.” Your move Wakefield.
Holler if you remember me!
Free. Agent. Bust.
I was actually decent.
I was John Mangum’s wife, might still be…anyway, I am absolutely, drop dead gorgeous. Brunette, hot body, with a pair of snack trays you could eat off for months.
So was I Mark.
Woops.
Yo bitches, I come correct. Anybody need a mortgage payment? I suck.
Who the fuck invited all these safeties? Carter? Carrier? Mangum? Get the fuck out of here! Mo Douglass, don’t even THINK about dancing your ass over here neither.
Red Sox win game 1… uh oh…
Hey R-Dub, how bout a block?