…and just why exactly do Fox, and incredibly some media “experts” think Troy Aikman is any good at all as an analyst? Even before he got his head bashed in repeatedly as a player he was dull as dirt and couldn’t say shit if he had a mouthful? Now his brain is so scrambled you never know what’s going to come out of him. When Steve Young, who also had his career cut short by concussions, was elected to the Hall of Fame on Saturday it prompted this interview by Aikman of Young.
Troy: Remember all those NFC Championship games we played against each other?
Steve: Nope. Not a one.
Troy: Me neither.
Great stuff…
…
Air Tran has announced that Elton John’s likeness will appear on 20 of the airline’s jets to help announce the fact that every AirTran seat is equipped with satellite radio.
Honestly, how could you feel safe hurtling through the sky in a plane embossed with the face of a guy who will go down on anything?
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For about 30 minutes the Illini were very beatable. But, it takes 40.
Dee made the steals and Luther, as always, made the big shots.
Michigan finally ran out of desperation heaves at the end.
Have I mentioned lately how much I love Luol Deng?
Groucho, like me, can’t figure out how Paul Pierce is an all-star.
Kirk and Eddy aren’t disappointed that they’re not all-stars. I’m disappointed that Eddy doesn’t play like one every night.
Chris DeLuca is still a simplistic boob.
USA Today’s Rod Beatoff thinks Brian Dopirak is like Vlad Guerrero without the arm, or the legs, or the tan. He also is excited that the Red Sox have signed Rob Neyer’s lovechild Roberto Petagine. Baseballprimer has an entertaining thread on this that reveals that Petagine has a FIFTY-SEVEN year old wife! Yikes.
A look at the Santo-Williams-Banks Cubs, warts and all.
Peter Gammons on the Magglio Ordonez signing.
KISS guitarist Ace Frehley says Donovan McNabb was sick at the end of the Super Bowl.
Kelly Dwyer has some brilliant readers. He gets the best mail. I’m telling you, it’s genius. It’s on page two.
Corey Feldman has had a “sickening realization” about Michael Jackson. My sickening realization is that Vanessa Marcil actually married Corey Feldman!
Jeff Bagwell’s ex-wife will sell you ad space on her cleavage!
Looks like there’s plenty of room.
America’s finest news source with the story of a Portland project manager who left a suicide PowerPoint presentation.
…is very depressing.
At least we can feel better about not getting a right fielder.
Oddly, however, Elton will NOT let the sun go down on HIM.
From IMDB:
Shaune Bagwell
Nickname – Dogs (ed note: Gotta find out why)
Height – 5′ 8″ (1.73 m)
——————————————————————————–
Mini biography
Shaune Bagwell was born to an English professor and the Chairman of the Board of a conveyor belt manufacturing company in Houston, Texas. A ballerina and former Miss San Jacinto, she was drawn to performing arts at a very young age. Spotted at school at the age of twelve by a local modeling agent who persuaded her parents to let her audition for a television commercial, she booked the commercial, and then a short time later, landed a small role in Paul Sorvino’s comedy, Vasectomy: A Delicate Matter (1986). With a genius level IQ, Shaune also has a natural love of science and medicine. Her studies of bacteriology and her theory of the New Ice Age earned her top accolades at several engineering science fairs, and she seriously considered a career in medicine. Scoring in the top one percent of her class on college entrance exams, she postponed formal education to pursue a career in modeling. Having traveled the world as a model, Shaune settled in Los Angeles to chase her dream of acting. After winning a role on the popular soap opera, “Days of Our Lives” (1965), and several films, she landed an up and coming series for the Women’s Entertainment Network, “Single in the City”, that was viewed worldwide in the spring of 2003.
Always fond of the fashion industry and a fan of the designer’s works, Shaune has appeared regularly in many magazines such as, People, InStyle, US Weekly, Women’s Wear Daily, and has been seen on the E! Channel. Even though She loves every aspect of the world of film and television, she hopes to one day earn her formal education degrees, and possibly become a doctor.
E! hostess who wants to be a doctor! Maybe she can give me a sherry enema.
Lemme tell you sumthin’, bruthas: The Illini have no quit in them, that’s for sure.
It is like the time I was up against the Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase, and he kept coming at me with his hired goons. He had a million dollars and could easily buy up the contracts of the likes of King Kong Bundy, Bigg John Studd, and my arch nemesis Andre the Giant. He would send these huge guys after me, trying to weaken me before our championship match. But he couldn’t keep me from beating him, no matter how many elbows and sunset flips he hit me with. In our climactic showdown, I was always able to avert the Million Dollar Dream sleeper hold and it wasn’t until the end of the match when The Million Dollar Man felt the power of Hulkamania. I even managed to punch out his valet, Virgil, and send him to the showers early.
The Fighting Illini were just like that last night: They didn’t buckle under the hostile conditions. Sure, it looked bleak for a while, but eventually the Illini got fed up, tore off their rag shirts, and were able to drop the leg on Michigan with a late comeback.
All the people all over the world ask me, “Hulkster, dude! When is the Illini going to lose a game?” And I tell them as long as they believe in themselves and cheer on the Illini, they will be able to celebrate in April when Nick Smith raises his 13-inch pythons and cuts down the championship net STRAND! (muscle pose) BY! (muscle pose #2) STRRRANNNNNNNDDDDD! (hold muscle pose #3).
After the time that Hardball Times article focused on, the Cubs went on to more brilliance! They let Sutter and Maddux go after winning Cy Young awards, Madlock go after winning batting titles, and traded away Carter, Palmeiro and Dontrelle. And lets not forget dumping almost the entire division winning 89 team by 91, oh sorry they did it again after the 03 division winning team, with only one postion player who started that year (patterson) left. GO CUBS!!!!!
Considering that Korey was doing the Rehab Hop when the Cubs won in 2003 (and came from several games down without Korey), I consider this outfield to be completely new from the 2003 Division Champs.
It’s not like Corey was leading the Cubs in batting average, homers, RBI and stolen bases when he got hurt or anything.
Oh, wait….
Since my 9-1 start in 2003, I’m 15-16 with a 4.31 ERA.
Andy, you ignore that for the last 5 games before he got hurt Corey was in a slump, thus negating his entire year’s effort. Or something. Chuck will soon explain.
Close. 25 games. And the slump was a robust .216. I say robust because it’s higher than the .177 he posted for the last month of 2004.
I give this guy credit. When he goes good, he goes real good. When he sucks, he cleans the smog outta the atmosphere.
Well – I’m outta here boys! Detroit City here I come!
Andy, damn you for mentioning that 1989 Illinois-Indiana game! Actually, that was a hell of a game, and since I had no idea that I was going to go to IU at that point, I was sort of pulling for Illinois in that one.
Aw, crap.
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Chuck’s right about Corey. At the time of his injury in 2003 he had just grounded out, throwing him into a 0-1 tailspin that the would not come out of until opening day 2004 when he hit nine homers and drove in 40 runs against the Mets.
Another Big of Shit gone from last year’s team. Adios Farnsworthless and don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out and no kicking fans either.
I have to say again, you have to give Jim Hendry credit for at least making(what we as common sense Cub fans would have done last year already) moves to get rid of such waste:
Wendell Kim
Kent Mercker
Paul Bako
Tom Goodwin
Ramon Martinez
Alex Gonzalez(applauded that you at least did that last year)
Rey Ordonez(never should have had this piece of shit in the first place last
year)
Sammy Sosa
Moises Alou(you’re just old Moises, that’s all)
last but not least Kyle Farnsworthless
But you have to admit it, this year’s roster has a lot of those guys trying to make it with a second career turnaround:
Todd Hollandsworth
Jeremy Burnitz
Ryan Dempster
Glendon Rusch
Neifi Perez
Joe Borowski
Mike Remlinger
Nomar(he’s coming off an injury)
But I’ll give Hendry this, I do believe for the first time in awhile, we will have true team chemistry on this team for the first time since 1984.
Go Cubs.
In Baker Basher We Trust
Pedantic point, but Corey beat that one out and Goodwin pinchran for him.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/boxscore?gameId=230706116
Thank God…I have a spot on the 25-man roster now…take that, Dolan.
It was a Tino Martinez cheap shot that hurt him!
Or something.
What you notice about those 60s Cubs teams are that in reality, Ernie wasn’t that good. His OBP barely scratches 300, and his defense was never good either. Sure, he kept his SLG up and kept posting consistent 25-30 HR, 80-90 RBI years, but that ain’t so hot. Sounds kinda like me, your new RF, no??
Williams and Santo carried the 60s era Cubs, and to a lesser extent, the very good pitching the Cubs had from 63 on. Jackson, McDaniel, Abernathy sure, and later the big guns, Fergie and Bill Hands and Holtzman and Regan.
Were it not for consistently weak OF performance (other than Billy), they might have got over the top one year. Hmmm…what Cubs team does this sound like?
I never knew I played basketball, last I knew I was a non-rostered invitee for the D-Rays……
I confess it’s been almost two weeks since my last prediction. So let me hit you with a few words of prophetic wisdom. Aight?
Novoa will make the Cubs as a righty set up man out of Spring Training and become the seventh inning stopper and the bridge between the starters and the Latroy Hawkins/Mike Remlinger gang bang in the eighth. Then it’s Ryan Dempster-time about 44 times this year. And how many of these Cub relievers do you think will represent them at the All-Star Game? I’d say a handful.
As for Farnsworth, he’ll be out of baseball in two years and then open up a nightclub in Atlanta with John Rocker called “Blow†where both will parade around in their jockstraps and dance for tips.
Here’s the first one: Learn to throw your slider for a strike so people have to at least think about swinging at it.
I used to play football at Syracuse and with the Panthers, too!
I think the Farns’ problem was throwing too many sliders. He’d get ahead with a fastball or two and then throw a slider and just miss. The batter had no chance to hit the slider because he was dialed up for the 100 MPH cheese. But then Kyle would throw a second slider in a row and watch it get whacked-Mike Mordecai style- into the ivory.
Never knew I played basketball? I played in the NBA for a decade, you dumbass!
Corey’s nine-homer game against NYM was opening day 2003. He stuck that right up Don Baylor’s poop shoot after Baylor predicted he’d be the next Odibe McDowell. That was cold right there, man. Just goes to show though, if you make predictions in New York you’d better be right or they will haunt you for the rest of your miserable life. AHHHH!!! What was that? Do y’all feel that? I gotta go. ~ PE
I punished Baylor for his comments on Corey…
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