Mitch Albom’s fib fest has gotten him suspended. It must be hard for a man of his stature. Well, the Derby’s in three weeks, maybe he can ride Steinbrenner’s horse? (In case you’re wondering, Mitch is a dwarf.)

The Cubs win, and lose a player. If I had a nickel for everytime that’s happened in the last three years I’d have…like 40 cents.

Will Mark Prior start tomorrow? If he does, will he give up six runs in the first inning?

Moron Todd’s injury.

Can Derrek Lee share his new calendar with Greggie?

The Bulls are in the playoffs and it’s going to be either Washington or Indiana. Let’s pull for the Wiz.

Ben Gordon’s pretty sure he won’t miss every shot, every game. Now that’s confidence!

Greg Couch dives into Scott Skiles mindgames with Ben Gordon. How about a simple reason for why Ben Gordon doesn’t play big minutes in the first three quarters of games. Have you seen him play defense? If he played big minutes the first three quarters he’d be in too much foul trouble to be aggressive in the fourth quarter. I’m a dope, and even I can figure that out.

Isn’t it obvious why the Brewers pitched to Todd Hollandsworth with a base open and the pitcher’s spot up next? I think we know why they took their chances with Holly. Guess who was getting ready to pinch hit?
Don't mess with Hank.

If the 2004 Cubs were the 2003 Cardinals, are the 2005 Cardinals becoming the 2004 Cubs? Huh? Anyway, they’re pissing and moaning, and you can smell that across the river.

Among the things in this Ken Rosental article is this little nugget.

A scout who saw Cubs RHP Mark Prior pitch at Class AAA Albuquerque last Thursday night said that the pitcher needs at least one more rehabilitation start. Prior touched 94 mph, the scout said, but lacked command. He frequently swiped at the ball upon receiving it from the catcher, indicating that he might be frustrated with his mechanics. Prior also appeared to be favoring his elbow, dropping his arm and pushing the ball.

Lacked command? Swiped at the ball? Dropped his elbow? Maybe he was at a Kerry Wood start?

Chip Caray is going to be so disappointed when he finds out that the man crush he has on Khalil Greene could be wasted on a guy who listens to dirty music. Chip will be aghast.

Peter King’s Monday Morning Quarterback. I love how he says he watched QB film with Phil Simms, but Phil asked him not to share any of Phil’s assessments. Then Peter gives his. Gee, do we think maybe Peter just agreed with everything Phil said and then was able to write it down? Hmm? Nah, of course not.

Honestly, Phil Rogers gets paid for this shit? Apparently, Phil thinks Kerry Wood and Mark Prior’s health will be a key for the 2005 Cubs. Wow! Where does he get this stuff! What a genius! Nobody else could have come up with that theory! Einstein, Von Braun, Rogers! Geniuses, all!

An excerpt from Gene Wojciechowski’s upcoming “Cubs Nation” book. This one’s on Kerry Wood’s love affair with the men in blue.

Here’s one on Maddux. Leo Mazzone wants Maddux to go to the Hall as a Brave. I could act all indignant, but…well, Maddux should go to the Hall as a Brave. They were smart enough to pay him what he was worth.

And one on LaTroy. Gee, who do you think he’s talking about with this quote? It’s either George Ofman, Dougnuts Mariotti or both. “You’re entitled to write what you want. At least say, ‘How you doing today?’ But don’t, when you see me, go tucking your tail and run like a b—-.”

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