Only the Cubs can make you worry about good news.
Hee Seop Choi ought to read this and realize that as soon as he gets near arbitration eligibility his cheap-ass general manager is going to ship him to yet another place.
The rumor is that Jon Scheyer has picked Duke. Maybe now would be a good time to tell him that Coach K is Polish, not Jewish.
“Damnit, you KNOW who this is! I’m OB damnit!”
Ron Turner says he’s still “evaluating” his quarterbacks. OK, let’s save him the time. Rex Grossman is good, but made out of dried twigs, Craig Krenzel is smart and terrible, Chad Hutchinson is dumb and less terrible and Kyle Orton is…three years away from having a clue. Good luck! Go get ’em!
The Franchise isn’t asking for much. Just perfection.
Mariotti puts down the doughnut to praise Ozzie. Yeah, that’ll last about one more week.
Hendry says of Carlos, “He will pitch this weekend.” Guh.
Andy Katz lists the teams hit hardest by early entries, and the Illini are on the list, especially if Dee doesn’t come to his senses.
Kelly Dwyer has unearthed news that Dwyane Wade is good.
America’s finest news source with a guy who wants some credit for getting his company some publicity…for a corporate scandal.
I’ve swam in OB’s pool before. Its not like it was filled with sharks or anything. This has William Shatner’s name written all over it.
It’s kinda creepy to know I’ve been someplace pretty specific where someone has died.
That’s when you can decide whether you want to invest any more time, effort and money in this year’s edition.
That’s the first day off after 20 games in 20 days and once that is over, those of you who have already written off the season, as well as those of us who naively hope for a turnaround, can come to a consensus.
I mean, really now, what’s another couple of weeks of blown saves, rally-killing double plays and unfortunate lineup decisions? Plus, as an added bonus, many of us may now qualify for degrees in sports medicine, given our vast knowledge of the inner workings of the human shoulder and elbow.
Soldier on ye tired, huddled masses yearning to breathe free (or at least live to see the day where a Cub pitcher records a 1-2-3 save in the 9th inning).
good morning from beautiful san diego, california, folks.
Honesty compels me to say that my buddy tHom is right, we just call’em as we see’em.
Dammit, Dave, you idiot! Maybe if you made more sandwiches for Scheyer, he’d come to Illinois.
I’m lookin’ at you, Chip Caray. You’ve already gone away. Now stay away.
Whining about Chip Caray jokes. Who cares if you think they’re funny? How hard is it to just roll your eyes, scroll one comment down and not worry about it? Christ.
We have long been a staple at Desipio. Every once in awhile, funny ones creep in there too, moran.
I love internet squabbles.
Its not about whining or who thinks whats funny. Its yesterday’s news, dig? Whats with the fascination with all things 2004? This town is so hung up on its sports history. Where else but Chicago could they have a million dollar marketing machine named “The Twentieth Anniversary Chicago Bears Super Bowl XX Championship Team”?
Chip Caray is a blip on the radar in Cubdom. Giving constant attention to his bleating and making jokes about him are the resort of a desperate fan trying to keep the gimick alive. It’s over. Move on.
How hard is it to just not post your stupid, lame “jokes”? No one wants to read them, so stop posting them. It isnt about us ignoring you. Annoyance is hard to ignore. Go annoy somewheres else.
That phrase is from the dinosaur age. You move on.
i must admit, i wondered what those assclowns on WGN were saying when my boy Mench hit the 2nd bomb last night and i was screaming “HE GONE! HE GONE!” at my tv. that’s the most ridiculous line i’ve ever heard, no doubt you guys hate it even more than me.
Can you guys tell jokes about how bad I was?
I use this when the lame-o Chip jokes come up. They are trotted out too often and lost their effectiveness when Chip fled town ahead of the pitchforks and torches, but it’s easy to ignore. I see where the No-Chip-Jokes whiner is coming from: The jokes really are unfunny. But use the ignore switch and move on.
I will say, I hope for more creativity from the Desipio readers when reaching for that next great gimmick. If you can put a new twist on an old favorite, fine, but leave the re-runs to yesteryear. Or ignore them. Dealer’s choice.
Holy Cow!
I really thought Annnnn-dre made a nice catch there, Dewayne, and his throw from right field, where he plays, was excellent as it got to Berryman, the catcher, in time, and got the runner, Dykstra, tagging up from third, which is what you do when the batter flies out deep to right. Great play all around.
Ever.
Carlos should not and I repeat should not take the mound against the Sux on Friday. I like his heart in the fact that he doesn’t want to go the Pussy Wood route. But really, the Cubs aren’t going anywhere in the standings this year except down.
This is an important stretch in the next two weeks to get wins, but there is no reason to blow up your best pitcher’s arm.
If the bullpen did its job and Dusty actually managed it right for a change, maybe these starters wouldn’t get hurt as much.
The blame needs to go on Jim Hendry for assembling that piece of shit bullpen. I am going to start Hendry Heckling as well as Baker Bashing because with these two clowns at the helm, these Cubs are doomed.
FDAJF=Fuck Dusty And Jim Forever
Baker Basher
You dipshits wouldn’t know funny if it jumped up and bit you in the ass.
a debate on what’s funny and not funny followed by a Baker Basher post. Must be a rough day.
It’s called irony. Look it up.
Dave Veres. That’s it, that’s the joke…Dave Veres.
Do you think I will at least try to look presentable this weekend? I mean looking like Bill Bellichick is okay, but in baseball a manager usually sometimes wears a jersey, not that scummy hooded sweayshirt.
How come basketball coaches and hockey coaches generally wear suits, but baseball managers wear a uni and football coaches wear anything short of Zubas?
Here’s funny:
> Jeff Van Gundy in a Rockets jersey, hairy shoulders and all.
> Mike Scoscia in a 3-piece suit, sweating through the jacket after the walk out to the mound.
> Tony LaRussa’s mullet touching the collar of his pressed white shirt (with ring around the collar).
> Don Nelson in a Mavs jersey, stretching the limits of the fabric.
> Dusty Baker in SeanJon.
This is not pretty
Tex, Hawk doesn’t call opposing home runs, so he didn’t say anything. He just kind of sighed, then gave the score.
And that homer Mench hit was a shot.
Put me in, coach, I’m ready!
Don’t look me up. I want nothing to do with any of this crap.
It’s taco night at my house this evening. I invited Aramis and Hank, but they are out of town. This means i will have bad taco gas for the next week.
I thought I was the only piece of crap that came from Baltimore. Enrique you stand no chance of playing with me here.
We’ll be backing up the Franchise tonight!
I can play first too, you know. That could be a great infield!!!!
Let’s hope Prior wore his hitting shoes tonight!
it’s Berryhill, not Berryman
Oh, yes, Berryhill. Dennis Berryhill, our catcher. He’s really done good for us this year as our catcher, catching all the pitcher’s throws and providing a reliable left-handed bat when he bats as he is a left-handed hitter. I sometimes mess up names when I give my hard-hitting analysis, so please excuse me, and please remember that when Ron Santo and Bob Brenly replaced me in 1990, it was considered an upgrade.
Howdy,folks. Honesty compels me to say that I am flabergasted by your support.
Me and my imaginary family back in Orlando thank you so very much. That’s what
good dear ole’ U.S. of A. is all about, folks.
Can’t wait to go visit the friendly confines again, in the meantime Hotlanta will do.
thanks again, folks.
Really, Dave, as histrionically uncompetent as you had been in your tremor with the Cubs, not one analyzer can get anywhere close to my incredulous butchering of the English language.
I was pretty sure it was written Berryman on purpose. Regardless, it was funny, and sadly true. Dave Nelson replaced Jim Frey in the booth and actually made Frey seem good by comparison. Awful. After following that dreck maybe Santo does deserve the Frickin’ Ford Award.
“Easy fly to left……Brant Brown is going after the ball……OOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!……NOOOOOOOOOO!…………..”
hey Chip Caray jokes bashers, how’s the visibility?
Andy, you said I wouldn’t miss anything, right? I think I’ll continue to rest for awhile. You were right, my friend. You couldn’t be more correct.
I am a-ok there, Steve good buddy.
Carlos, call in sick this weekend.
I send you and your visitors my best greetings.
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