We wondered aloud last week why E-ramis was getting a free pass during his epic slump. I think the answer is that everybody just kind of figured he’d start to hit. Like he has.
Dusty wants the Cubs to play better defense. A start would be to give Corey a glove that opens.
Some Bay Area mope wants the A’s to trade Eric Byrnes to the Cubs for Dusty Baker. How about Eric Chavez? I’m sure we could find a spot for him.
The Jockey wonders if the Cubs will back up the truck at the trading deadline if they’re still at or around .500. If they would swing a deal to improve their offense, they wouldn’t even have to worry about that.
The Jockey answers his mail, and there’s a very dumb Cubs fan in Rockford.
Mariotti puts down the doughnut to give too much credence to Dusty’s inference that LaTroy had a mailbox full of racist hate mail. Who writes letters these days? OK, maybe just the Klan.
John Koronka? Really? This is the best we can do? No wonder the Cubs traded for Jerome.
Kerry threw 30 pitches off the mound yesterday, which for him is one simulated inning.
Todd Helton just loves Wayne Hagin. Who can blame him?
I was all set to believe the rumors that Larry Brown was going to join the Cavs as their president until I read that Chad Ford says it’s going to happen.
The Mets want to deal and they’re looking for a second baseman and bullpen help. Kind of makes you wonder if the trade that Mike Remlinger squished like his finger between two chairs was him and Jerry the Lesser to the Mets for Mike Cameron or Cliff Floyd.
Kelly Dwyer seems to think that the Spurs and some guy named Dwyane are pretty good. If you watched the Spurs-Suns last night, how great was that :10 second stretch where Amare Stoudamire stuffed a Tim Duncan dunk attempt, then outhustled Manu Ginobili for a rebound? Amare’s a man.
John Donovan doesn’t believe in the White Sox or Orioles. I agree with him in both instances. In fact, I think the Sox will lose their AL Central lead before June ends.
The Jeff Pentland experience didn’t end any happier in KC than it did in Chicago. The guy’s a complete fraud.
Peter King has picked the Vikings to be in Super Bowl XL. Whatever.
America’s finest news source with a guy who insists the milk’s not spoiled until he says it is.
Guess everyone will blame me for bringing the team down.
God I’m glad to get away from this hunk of crap team!!!!!
Hopefully, the Cubs will not rot in last place……
Thanks Mr Hendry for trading me.
I’m not exactly sure what is happening with the Cubs here lately with all this run production? But I’d have to say Ramirez’s hitting is a big factor. It sort of helps when you have two strong power hitters in the lineup instead of just one.
Amen with the Hawkins trade though. It’s about time Jim Hendry did something right this year. I’d have to agree that he didn’t initiate the trade and the Giants called him up instead. It was too good of a trade to pass up for what they were going to give the Cubs, so Jim gave in and made it.
I’m just finally glad that the Cubs have a young bullpen that isn’t overpaid. So what if these guys are a bunch rookies. If they get the job done and you save a butt load of money, you can go spend that money on the offense.
Now if we can keep these injuries down, maybe, just maybe the Satanic Red Fowl will hear footsteps in the next month or two.
Baker Basher
I’m pretty sure the guys most responsible for the Cubs’ recent power surge are: E-ramis Ramirez, Derrek Lee, BK Kim, Joe Kennedy, Jeff Francis and Wilson Alvarez. Just a hunch.
Check out these great lines after the Holiday weekend:
Sullivan: “After accidentally cutting his left ear lobe in a freak shaving injury, Paul Sullivan is back to answer your questions about all things Cub.”
Marrioti: “Let me first say this: The people who wrote letters to LaTroy Hawkins and peppered him with racial epithets should hang from a Wrigley Field flagpole by their testicles.”
Quality stuff. Who says journalism’s dead?
I wonder which Dodger Alyssa Milano is after now? She even stayed longer than most Dodger fans last night.
Hide me!!!
I’ll admit it.
Alyssa and I are dating.
I met Alyssa at Match.com, and we’ve been e-mailing for months!
I was thinking Brad Penny because of his connection with her ex Josh Beckett.
Hey, Dave B. As for my connection with Josh Beckett, I was really drunk and looked really hot that night.
Yeah, I guess I did word that observation in a homo-sounding manner. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, especially if it’s those two.
I suck.
May 28th, 2004: In the second game of a memorable Double Header (if you’re Rob Mackowiak Jr. or whatever the hell he named his kid) allows the second consectutive game tying ninth inning homer to the new Daddy. Cubs lose in 10, 5-4.
June 30th, 2004: Brought into a tie game in the ninth, craps his pants and gives up tie breaking HR to Carlos Beltran. Cubs lose 3-2.
July 20th, 2004: Generalissmo Albie Pujols goes 5-5 and hits his third homer of the day (a three run shot) off Latroy in the 9th sealing the Satanic Fowl’s victory after being down 8-1. Cubs lose 11-8.
July 25th, 2004: After getting nothing the entire game against Philles starter Eric Milton, the Cubs manage to scratch two across in the ninth to tie the game. Unfortunately, Latroy blows it in the bottom half and allows a single to Pat Burrell to end it. Cubs lose 3-2.
August 21st, 2004: Coming into the ninth down by 1 to the Astros, the Cubs actually manage to score 2 off closer Brad Lidge. What happens next? You guessed it, Latroy comes in for the “save” and gives up two more. Cubs lose 4-3.
September 25th, 2004: After The Franchise goes 7 2/3 scoreless innings against the Mets, Latroy comes into the game with 2 guys on and 1 out. After getting someone named Jeff Keppinger to fly out, the ever dangerous Victor Diaz goes yard to tie the game. Cubs lose in 11, 4-3, after someone else named “Craig Brazell” homers in the 11th off Kent Mercker.
April 8th, 2005: Latroy + Hollandsworth in for “defense” = another one run 9th inning blown save. Cubs lose the home opener in 12, 6-3.
April 23, 2005: The Battlin Bucco’s battle back with 2 in the 9th-Jason Bay homers to cut the Cub lead to 3-2 and Latroy then walks Craig Wilson’s mullet. Freddy Sanchez triples off Glendon Rusch to give the Bucco’s a 4-3 lead and they hold on to win.
May 5th, 2005: Cubs tie in the ninth + bringing Latroy into a tie game + Jerry the Lesser on defense + Carlos Lee = Another 1 run loss, 6-5.
May 6th, 2005: Derrek Lee homers off Billy Wagner in the 8th inning to give the Cubs the lead. Latroy brought into a game with a one run lead which allows this hilarity to occur after Latroy craps his pants and throws the ball off Jose Offerman’s helmet: P Polanco lined out to pitcher, J Michaels and D Bell scored, J Offerman to third on throwing error by pitcher L Hawkins. Not something you see every day. Cubs lose 3-2.
May 9th, 2005: Demoted from the closer role, Latroy instead enters the 8th inning in a tie game. It won’t make a difference as Dougie Eyechart goes yard, and the Cubs go on to lose 6-3.
But, oh yeah, it’s racism.
Nobody SAID the reason he didn’t pitch well was racism, you dumbass. But the fact that he got racist hate mail, no matter how he pitched, no matter what he did, is FUCKED UP. That seems to be what Dusty was getting at.
And I never heard Hawkins complaining about racism to the media while he was getting booed. I actually never heard him complain at all. So please, for the love of God, shut up.
Dear LaTroy,
Welcome to the club. Your key to the lodge is enclosed.
Remember, there is life after the Cubs.
Sincerely,
Past-Presidents
Dave Smith
Antonio Alfonseca
Rick Aguilera
Mel Rojas
Mitch Williams
Terry Adams
Rod Beck
I am taking my poop and leaving this racist town…plop, slosh, fart, plop, poop…1 last time y’all. I be out.
Dear Christ. LaTroy stated on at least two occassions that he was playing for the other 24 players, Dusty, and Hendry, and that’s it. Fuck him. The racist stuff sucks if it happened, but good riddance to him and his fragile psyche.
Leave me out of this, dudes.
Was he supposed to have warm, happy feelings about the people booing him whenever he stuck his head out of the bullpen? I don’t care if he only played for his teammates, or not. Does it matter? Whoever he was playing for doesn’t make him pitch better or worse.
I’m not defending his pitching at all. I’m not even talking about his pitching. I just think it’s fucking retarded to trivialize racism, like that comment was doing. It does exist, and it affects lot of people that have to deal with it every day. It’s not something Dusty just made up, for fuck’s sake. And neither Dusty nor Hawkins claimed that Chicago is a racist town, or used that as an excuse for why he couldn’t close — which some of the people here don’t seem to understand.
The This Old Cub, closer division? Christ, you forgot Lee Smith, Bruce Sutter, Dennis Eckerseley, and Willie Hernandez…ALL of which either won the Cy Young, Rolaids award, or league MVP AFTER leaving Wrigley.
And you also forgot Goose Gossage, who was washed up by the time he got HERE, but Christ, he was the Man in his day.
Unfortunately, there’s a lot more where that came from, Sloth.
Not everyone can be a past-president.
What, no room for me in the club?
Dear Neifi,
You stink. Did you poop your pants?
Love,
Apex
LaTroy: Damnit! I hate it when they call me Neifi!
Where do I mail my dues to?
Son, watch you mouth or I’ll send you to be sacrificed again.
Hopefully, I’m next out fo this crap hole. This locker room and these shitty fans are enough to make me put my hand between two chairs and have the cigar store indian named “dusty” break my fingers so I don;t ahve to pitch in this run down ball park anymore.
Don’t forget to tell them how lame Van Halen is, Remmy!
I love the hidden jokes every day. Desipio has Easter eggs. Who knew? Must just be to piss off Chuck.
Speaking of lame Todd, let us look back on that partially shaved head you had a few weeks ago..
Yeah… Van Halen sucks!!! We need better music.
Let’s hope that they will parole us veterans so we can get back to living a “normal” life out of this shithole
Some might ask hot it is that I can’t seem to remember that Borowski was the best reliever on the 2002 Cubs. Simple answer: that way, I can second guess Hendry’s reliance on him in 2004 as a mistake based on a “one year wonder.” No need for facts. Just second guessing whenever convenient.
This Hawkins fiasco is just the culmination of all the worthless relievers over the past so many years for the Cubs. The people of Chicago were tired of these overpaid nonperforming dopes from the bullpen. Latroy wasn’t the first to be booed and run out of town like that and he won’t be the last.
These following guys were in his place years before:
-Mel Rojas
-Jeff Fassero
-Tom Gordon
-Kyle Farnsworthless
-Antonio “Six Finger” Alfonsucka
-Mike Remlinger(if he ever pitches again, what a candyass, he’s the next that needs to go)
There were countless other wastoids along the way too. These are just the son of a bitches that are currently stuck in the mind the past couple years.
But really, race shouldn’t be involved in this thing. Latroy probably is a really great guy to hang with, but he is just useless as a baseball player. Fact is fact.
I feel for the Giants that they have him now, but there are other stupid teams out there like Detroit that has the Farns as well. Another man’s trash is another man’s treasure.
Baker Basher
Why would mouseovers piss me off?
When you mouse over me it says, “I’m not the switch-hitting Derek Jeter but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.”
Sometimes it says, “I can’t spell worth shit.”
ALYSSA IS DATING BRAD PENNY, THE TWO HAVE BEEN SPOTTED LEAVING THE DODGERS PLAYER PARKING LOT TOGETHER. wOW….THAT GIRL REALLY LOVES THEM PITCHERS…..PAVANO, ZITO, PENNY.