I have seen a lot of embarassing things in my nearly 30 years of Cubs fan existence. I’ve seen John Murray run onto the field and try to give Randy Myers a hug, only to have Randy nearly kill him on the spot. That was almost as embarassing as those awful “It’s Gonna Happen” signs that Murray litters the park with in absentia.
I’ve seen LaTroy Hawkins yell at an umpire for five minutes before his teammates could finally get him into the dugout.
I’ve seen Jock Jones.
No, honest, just seeing Jock was embarrassing.
I’ve seen Cubs fans boo Greg Maddux when he returned in 1993 with the Braves.
But I don’t know if anything will ever top the ridiculous amount of adoration that was thrown towards Mark DeRosa this past weekend.
I didn’t mind so much on Friday, when he took his first at bat he got a nice ovation and it was a classy gesture by the fans. He was a fine player on a couple of very good Cubs teams, and it was his first time back.
But that should have been it. Later on in that game he’d run clumsily into the wall and maybe even bullpen phone down the left field line and hurt himself and not only have to leave the game eventually but he couldn’t start Saturday’s game.
But he got to play on Saturday. With the game tied at four in the top of the eighth, the Indians had two on and one out and DeRosa came up as a pinch hitter. And he got another standing O. Everyone standing and clapping should be beaten with a sock full of quarters. What is wrong with these people?
Even if he was ever as good as you seem to think he was, why are you rooting for him to get a hit to beat the Cubs? Because, that’s what you were doing, even if (and this is a safe bet) you are too dumb to realize it.
Anyway, Aaron Heilman struck him out (which should end any speculation that a contender wants DeRosa, I mean, if Aaron Heilman strikes you out, you should probably retire), and his crazed sychophants had to wait another whole day to try to fellate him from the stands.
He went hitless on Sunday, too.
The real story was the return of Kerry Wood.
Remember how awful we felt when he imploded in game seven of the NLCS? We got to enjoy that from the other side not just once, but twice this weekend.
Kerry’s an awesome guy, one of the most popular Cubs of all time, and one of my (as if this is important) all-time favorite Cubs. But he’s not pitching for the Cubs now, if you haven’t noticed, and given how much you were lathered up over DeRosa, you probably didn’t notice.
He comes in to Friday’s game with a one run lead after the Cubs had improbably scored four runs in the eighth to make a game out of it, and Derrek Lee hits one into Pollyellonland in left, blown save, Cubs go on to win in the 10th.
Saturday’s took more work. The Indians took the lead in the 13th when the great Luis Valbuena, who had one homer and was barely hitting .200 when the Indians came into town, (and went 6-12 with two homers), homered to give the Indians a 5-4 lead.
Here’s who the Cubs had coming up:
Kosuke
Koyie
Blanco
Miles
Fox
How in the world was Kerry supposed to give up two runs to that?
He started by walking Kosuke, that’s a start.
Koyie struck out, but he’d worked a full count and Kosuke ran on the pitch, and catcher Kelly Shoppach’s throw went into center putting Kosuke on third with one out.
But these are the Cubs, and nobody in baseball this year has been better at leaving guys at third than they have.
So there was poor little Andy White, completely overmatched. This had strike out written all over it.
Until he slapped a 17 hopper past a drawn in infield to tie the game.
At this point, the Indians are going through Wood’s locker trying to find an envelope full of cash that Jim Hendry gave him on Friday morning.
But he’s not done. He gives up a hit to Aaron Miles…AARON MILES! That puts Blanco on third with Jake Fox coming up.
All Jake needs is a long flyball and it’s over. Kerry’s not sure Jake is up to it, so he throws one about six feet wide of Shoppach, Blanco trots home, and the Cubs win!
In the 11 years since he broke in with the Cubs, Kerry’s done a lot of things to help the organization and his team. He struck out 20 guys in a game, he was the balls down the stretch in ’03 and in the ALDS NLDS (whoops), he’s been an All-Star as a starter and a closer, he’s hit homers, he’s done a lot. And you can put Friday and Saturday into that mix, too.
The 2009 Cubs were a team on the verge. It was a good pitch-no-hit bunch that couldn’t find its way. They had a little momentum after that improbable win over the Sox on Thursday, and Kerry helped them find their sea legs this weekend.
It’s a division that’s there for the taking, and the Cubs, still, the best team 1-25 (especially 1-26 with E-ramis included) needed a push to help get them through their roughest patch since May of 2007, and Kerry came through. Just like always.
Thanks!
Just when you think Ryan Theriot has figured things out (how he got that ball on Friday to bounce around Victor Martinez was amazing) he does something like yesterday in the first inning. With one out he’s on third and Milton Bradley is up (did anybody even know that Milton now has a 10 game hitting streak?) and Milton hits one down the line. The third baseman makes the play and Theriot runs right into him. He’s out, and he’s out so fast that Bradley’s out by 10 feet at first.
Little Leaguers don’t do that. They have the sense to not run right at a guy with the ball. Besides, it’s THIRD base. Theriot has all that foul territory to play with, and yet, Peralta didn’t even have to lunge to tag him out.
Has there ever been a scrappy overachiever as dumb as Ryan Theriot? I think being that dumb actually disqualifies you from scrappy overachieverness.
The Cubs had to fly to Atlanta to make up a game from June 4th that was rained out. That game is tonight. This is clearly wrong. I thought the Cubs had agreed that any rained out games wouldn’t be rescheduled until E-ramis comes back off the DL. Unless he’s coming back tonight, this clearly violates this policy that I worked so hard to enact. I guess Mike Fontenot will just have to hit three homers to make up for it.
By the way if you haven’t signed up for the Desipio Twitter Feed, you don’t know what you are missing. I mean, how could you know what you were missing, you haven’t seen it. Right?
And while you are Twittering, check out Tao of Santo. It’s not bad. I’m still enjoying the one he sent Milt Rosenberg the other night.
Since Phil never bothers to use me, let me point out that:
1) Kosuke singled off of Wood, not walked
2) Kerry Wood was balls in the NLDS, not the ALDS.
So you don’t mind that people cheered for him on Friday but it should have ended there? I went on Sunday, was I not allowed to cheer because people on Friday already took care of it for me?
I’m so tired of people telling me who I can root for and who I can boo.
Jay, you’re the reason that Cubs fans get laughed at. The fact that you’re cheering for a guy that has an under .800 OPS for his career is the issue.
Theriot’s OPS is .737, so why does everyone suck him off?
Isn’t this the site that had a Hank White fan club? AJ, why don’t you send me an “AJ approved” list of players that I’m allowed to like, that’d be helpful.
Cub fans are the same bunch that worship crappy players like Murton, Ojeda, Dubois, etc. I don’t think that me cheering for DeRosa in his first AB is a problem.
“Theriot’s OPS is .737, so why does everyone suck him off?”
Because he played for the Cubs, dipshit.
Were you also one of those fucksticks who went out and bought New Orleans Saints shirts when Ditka was hired in ’97? I’m guessing…yes.
Jay- I don’t have a problem with each day’s crowd cheering DeRosa. Once. I can understand it is a new crowd each day. But what about his multiple at-bats Friday and Sunday? They stood and cheered every time. Even when he came up in the top of the 9th of a one run ballgame Friday.
You just made my point for me: it’s guys like you that worship the Theriot’s (overrated, shit defense, dumb as a doorknob) of the world. That in and of itself is annoying (I mean what incentive does a team have to improve when you have your Theriot jersey on), but then you go beyond that and worship DeRosa, a lifelong utility player who isn’t even with the team.
And you’re right – you breed of Cubs fans are the same dolts that worship Varsho, and Augie, and Theriot, and Wood.
It makes it hard for the rest of us that actually understand baseball.
I think a major distinction that is not being made is the fact that you cannot simply lump all Cubs fans in with those who go to the games. I am the most devoted fan I know, but I’ve only been to 2 games this year, and that’s one more than last year. Do you really think all those jorts wearing Iowans who get off those buses speak for the majority of Cubs fans? I don’t. A lot of people at the game cheered over the weekend because DeRosa looks like, on any other day, he could be sitting next to them watching the game. Do not think, for one minute, that even if Jock Jones had hit 3 HRs against the Diamondbacks in 07 that he would get the same reception. Not even close.
Mike D- No, I was not. Just so you know, Theriot still plays for the Cubs too.
AJ- I guess reading comprehension is not your strong suit but I didn’t say I liked Theriot. I’m asking you if the basis for being allowed to like a player is that his career OPS is over .800, then why does everyone like Theriot? That has to be one of the dumbest arguments I’ve ever heard but if you like to tell yourself that you actually understand baseball then who am I to stop you.
Matt- I agree with you. I’m not sure why everyone is acting like I threw panties at the guy. I cheered for him the first chance I got, which was Sunday. I don’t think that qualifies me to be beat with a sock full of pennies.
You know who my favorite Cub was? Matt Stairs. He was the ballz lol.
No Jay, being the epitome of the dumbass Cubs fan that you are, clearly the basis for liking a player is not an average or above average OPS. It’s stuff like being gritty, someone you can have a beer with, and being white.
Clearly numbers and performance should have no bearing on why you should cheer for a player. What scares me as that you might actually believe the bullshit you feed yourself.
Jorts wearing Iowans don’t speak for the majority of Cubs fans. Al Yellon does that.
and Kap.
I do not want to fellate Mark DeRosa. As I recall, though, I wouldn’t mind having Mrs. DeRosa fellate me.
I won’t give a shit for whom anyone cheers, if you don’t give shit when I make fun of you for it.
I can barely cheer for this current group of assholes let alone ones that aren’t on the goddamn team anymore.
RACISTS!!!!!
RE: #2
“I went on Sunday, was I not allowed to cheer because people on Friday already took care of it for me?”
Yes. It was handled.
Holy shit, it’s Mark DeRosa. On the great scale of accomplishment, if E-ramis ever leaves and comes back, we’ll have to carry him around the goddamned field on our shoulders every time he comes to bat.
You just made the list, pal!
when somebody writes such a sucky article with apparently no research. Maybe next time before you blast some fans, you should check your own work before publishing it.
Why don’t we do that already?
Because a few typos automatically invalidate his argument about stupid fans? Maybe next time you post a comment that makes you look stupid, you should check your logic.
Re: 21
We just carry him off the field, not around it.
I only cheer for returning players of note, not utility infielders best known for catastrophic ****-ups in consecutive years in the playoffs.
The WORST part of the series was that Mark DeRosa got a warmer reception than Kerry Wood, who actually DESERVES standing ovations for the 11 seasons he busted his ass for this team, and actually won something for them.
What about me? I will sit quietly here waiting for someone to recognize me then vote me into the hall. I would be cheered, no?
“I am the most devoted fan I know, but I’ve only been to 2 games this year, and that’s one more than last year.”
How many people do you know?
when some dipshit reads a BLOG about something he doesn’t agree with, and then proceeds to bitch like the giant bitch he obviously must be.
Kerry got a couple of nice hands, both times as he left the field.
Hey, Mike D., This is your IQ, buddy zero!
Actually, you’re onto something, pal. You see, gang, in life, you get cheered for achieving your goals. Like winning in the postseason. All you Mark DeRosa fans, I think you owe me and I’m here to collect.
They say the past is for losers and cowards. Well, Mark’s an Indian now. A Cleveland Indian, not a Sioux or a guy living in Mumbai. I’m an orange restaurateur and a guy who spends his Sundays in the Fall swearing at Berman and Michael Irvin during commercial breaks. So, maybe we should look to the past:
Mike Ditka’s postseason record in Wrigley Field: 1-0.
Mark DeRosa’s postseason record in Wrigley Field: 1-4.
Mark DeRosa’s postseason record at Wrigley Field in games he actually played: 0-4.
Mark DeRosa’s postseason record as a player for the home team in Wrigley Field: 0-3.
Mike Ditka’s home record as Bears coach: 4-4
Mark DeRosa’s postseason record as a Cub: 0-6
Mike Ditka’s postseason record as Bears coach: 6-6
Mike Ditka overall postseason record as a Chicago Bear: 7-6.
Ditka vs. DeRosa? Ditka.
None of the rest of it bothers me too much, but cheering for DeRosa in a pressure situation with the game on the line is punchably pathological. The rest of it was just kind of sad–and please guys, remember, no matter how much you cheer for him, DeRosa is not going to take you to the prom, he’s already going with Diane Court.
Ryan can handle things! He’s smart! Not like everybody says… like dumb… He’s smart and he wants respect!
I’m sorry I’ve been sleeping. Did I miss a bunch of championships while Kerry Wood was here throwing towels and batting practice to the Marlin in game 7? I don’t get why anybody gave DeRosa more than a golf clap but why does an injured dope who never learned how to pitch get so much love here? He had 20 strike outs when Clinton was still getting oval office hummers and had a couple games in the qualifying round of the playoffs. The amount of time and effort wasted on that guy is unreal. He never won more than 14 games in a year. It’s like Mark Derosa came here as a teenager and wouldn’t leave.
Rip, I don’t agree with everything you said but I’m LoLing. I LoLed.
This whiny bitchfest about good and bad Cubs fans sounds like an argument Elias Coblentz would have with his sister while trying on jorts.
I’ve had more than 14 wins!
Apparently Rip Van Winkle hasn’t liked any Cubs since Frank Chance and Three Finger Brown.
“Fuck Ernie Banks. Did I miss a bunch of championships while he was here or something?”
First Jim says “you’re all winners” Then, if i’m reading this correctly, he compares Kerry 14 game winning wood to Ernie Banks. Kerry Wood deserves standing ovations for winning 74 games in a cub uniform? Herman Franks won that many in one year and still had time to embellish the cold cuts.
Ernie Banks won 2 Mvp’s hit 512 hr’s in an era when that was hard, gimped around with arthritis, dealt with racism on the road and uncle tomisim here and was the greatest shortstop of his generation. Kerry Wood struck out 20 guys once. Oh and he won like 7 other games per year. Maybe sox fans are right. If Jim is the guy, maybe Cub fans get the teams they deserve. Kerry Wood was a loser. And the Cubs held on to him the same way the did mark grace b/c he was a white, cute loser.
Kerry Wood, who actually DESERVES standing ovations for the 11 seasons he busted his ass for this team, and actually won something for them.
I’m sorry. I had to reread this from Jim Nantz b/c it’s the stupidest thing ever to grace the internet in the non yellon division. What did he win for the Cub?
Can you even put it on a tshirt? NLCS runner ups? playoff games in a round that didn’t exist 20 years ago? 20 games in a season? a cy young?
Shit, Rick Sutcliffe won a ROY, a Cy young, and actually had 2 seasons, count them 2 with an era under 3. A very nice player. Won 170 games too. More than double what loserboy won. Pitched through injuries too. Actually didn’t spit the bit in the biggest game of his career either. Not a gem, but not a pathetic joke like Wood the fraud.
“Actually didn’t spit the bit in the biggest game of his career either.”
Oh no?
Sutcliffe’s Game 5 in San Diego is almost perfectly analagous to Wood’s Game 7 in ’03. Look it up.
Perfectly analagous? Let’s see. Wood gave up 7 runs in 5 1/3 on 8 hits and 4 walks. He was dreadful from the first inning. Sutcliffe had maybe his worst start of the year and through 6 innings gave up 2 runs which like it or not is what is described as a quality start.
Not just analagous. Identical. Well except for Wood totally sucking and taking his team out of the game by the 5th inning.
Leaving that aside, and I’m not claiming Sut was all that during his cub career, he was a better pitcher as a Cub than Wood. Much better. And yet he isn’t called this winner and guy who gave his all while he was here
Wood isn’t even in the top 5 Cub pitchers in my lifetime and I’m only 45.
Overrated. Fraud.
Your mom’s a DeRosa.