Desipio Message Board

Quote from: Fork on September 30, 2009, 09:01:16 AM

Quote from: Kermit, B. on September 30, 2009, 08:59:28 AM

Quote from: Fork on September 30, 2009, 08:38:48 AM
May 4, 1984, the Oakland A's Dave Kingman hit a ball that disappeared through a drainage hole in the Teflon roof. The ball never came down, and Kingman was given a ground-rule double. The next day, the Twins devised a plan in which, before Kingman's first at-bat, a ball would drop from the roof so that Twins first baseman Mickey Hatcher could make the catch. As Kingman stepped into the batter's box, the ball knuckled its way down, bounced and hit Hatcher in the groin, sending him to the turf. "Kingman looked at me and said, 'What's wrong with you?' " says Hatcher, now the LA Angels batting coach.

I have no idea what the point of this story is, but why the hell wasn't Hatcher wearing a cup?

Point of story: Nut shots are always funny.

Re: Hatcher and the cup: Ever been hit in the cup by a baseball travelling at a decent speed? It'll still make you puke, just won't turn your nuts to puree.

Especially on a fromunda shot like that.

Quote from: Trinew: The Boiler on September 29, 2009, 07:50:43 PM

Quote from: Gil Gunderson on September 29, 2009, 07:08:00 PM

Here's my question.  Is there this much anger and vitriol and Dolchstoßlegende just because the president is black or because the president is a Democrat?

That's the same question I have.

I also enjoy that every time I go home I get to hear a not-so-thinly veiled jab at Obama ruining the country from my parents. Each and every time.

Ever listen to Michael Savage?

That's my dad's question as I'm leaving to head back to the city.

Facepalm.

For me, it's definitely the half-negroid sandjew part I don't like.

SAYNT LEWIS KARDENALZ!

Well, hey.  I got the delightful experience of watching Chiefs/Eagles.  I mean, it was so entertaining!  I almost would have rather watched a Cubs game.

Quote from: IrishYeti on September 25, 2009, 12:10:54 PM

Quote from: air2300 on September 25, 2009, 10:24:44 AM

Quote from: IrishYeti on September 25, 2009, 10:14:12 AM

Quote from: Indolent Reader on September 25, 2009, 09:51:37 AM
AT&T question for you cellphone dudes:

-Back in February, my wife renewed her contract with AT&T for two years.  In exchange she got a complete piece of crap phone.  She has since decided that she hates this phone so much that she wants an Iphone.  AT&T, however, will not give her the "new subscriber" price (ie, the $200 subsidy), because she is in the middle of a contract.  This does not make sense to my caveman mind - why would she be treated as a 3G subscriber when she has never had the benefit of the lowest pricing? (other than corporate greed, of course).  

Any advice on what to do next?  I've tried the AT&T store and 800 number to no avail.

Thanks.

Pretty sure you have to wait 18-20 months to get a cheaper upgrade, and based off of what you're describing, that's basically what you are wanting to do: upgrade her phone.

Yea, it's 20 months with At&T.  And they will make you wait 20 months even if your phone is not working before you can upgrade.  Not much you can do here besides pay the full price or keep the phone. 

or buy insurance and then a week later turn the phone in because it's not working to get a replacement.

The problem lies with you not getting an iPhone in the first place.

Quote from: IrishYeti on September 24, 2009, 08:09:38 PM
Don't fuck with Springfield you towel head biatches: http://www.chicagobreakingnews.com/2009/09/man-accused-of-plotting-to-bomb-springfield-courthouse.html?track=email-alert-breakingnews

'MERICAAAAA, FUCK YEAH!

8MINUTEVIDEOBONER:  http://kotaku.com/5367101/8-minutes-of-modern-warfare-2-story-mode

Quote from: World B Free on September 24, 2009, 09:53:28 AM

Quote from: Jon on September 24, 2009, 09:31:22 AM
Um...

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5jbzG_BlkG2Hfc818EPRRn1bBlP6gD9ATASJ00

He was found Sept. 12 in a remote patch of the Daniel Boone National Forest in rural southeast Kentucky.

Can't say that I'm shocked by this.

The hillbillies don't much like Gubment-types pokin' ner noses around where they ain't welcome.

I have a theory:  maybe the Kentucky hillbillly rubes have no idea of what a Census is.  Maybe they saw this guys as a threat to their meth lab.  I wouldn't put it past them.

Quote from: Dr. Nguyen Van Falk on September 23, 2009, 04:17:57 PM
Because this thread is clearly good for nothing else whatsoever, and anything would be a better use of the bandwidth, let's change things up a bit...

http://www.reuters.com/article/entertainmentNews/idUSTRE58M4Z320090923

QuoteLOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Actress Mackenzie Phillips said in a memoir published on Wednesday that she had an incestuous affair for years with her father John Phillips, the late singer with 1960s band The Mamas & the Papas.

In the memoir "High Arrival", which was published a year after she was arrested for cocaine possession, Phillips writes that she had sex with her father at age 19, the night before her 1979 marriage to Jeff Sessler, a member of the Rolling Stones' entourage.

The former star of TV sitcom "One Day at a Time" said she and her father used drugs that night. John Phillips died in 2001.

"My father was not a man with boundaries," Phillips writes. "He was full of love, and he was sick with drugs. I woke up that night to find myself having sex with my own father."

Phillips' half-sister, Chynna Phillips, told US Weekly magazine she believed Mackenzie's story. Chynna said Mackenzie told her in a 1997 phone call about the incest and that it lasted for 10 years.

The fuck?  10 years?  That's 10 trips around the sun, correct?  I mean, I understand the 10 nanoseconds after she woke up with her dad inside her and being kind of caught like a deer in the penis trap, but 10 YEARS?  Holy fuck, even a backwards swamp creature like me knows 10 years is too long to boink a family member.

Quote from: Fork on September 23, 2009, 11:51:03 AM

Quote from: TDubbs on September 23, 2009, 10:24:13 AM

Quote from: Fork on September 23, 2009, 07:55:02 AM

Quote from: Jon on September 22, 2009, 03:59:13 PM

Quote from: TDubbs on September 22, 2009, 03:44:06 PM

Quote from: Jon on September 22, 2009, 03:33:44 PM

Quote from: Fork on September 22, 2009, 03:28:57 PM

Quote from: Dr. Nguyen Van Falk on September 22, 2009, 02:34:46 PM

Quote from: Eli on September 22, 2009, 01:48:28 PM
Guh.

Not sure what you were expecting.

I think the only thing to expect in this thread would be a litany of one-liners by yours truly, which eventually culminate in TDubbs spewing about how I have better ways to spend my time and am wasting the time of others, to which I respond with something along the lines of, but not necessarily, "blow me".

Ad infinitum.

You could really say that about any thread here.

But what about this one?

Well this one is mostly about disappointment.

How can you be disappointed when you get exactly what you expect?

I expect horribly unfunny posts by you, along with boring hockey ones, and even when you post them, every single time, I'm disappointed.

shouldn't you be off somewhere letting Cubbiejulie use your face for a bicycle seat?

Holy shit.  I just LOLed at a ForkJoke.

Quote from: air2300 on September 22, 2009, 06:54:32 PM

Quote from: PiniellaTailOnTheDonkey on September 22, 2009, 01:55:42 PM

Go Gators!

I don't like the message she's trying to send here.  Alls I can think about is T-boning that endzone.

Quote from: BH on September 22, 2009, 12:32:50 PM
Since every post ends up with them critiquing each others posts, figured we'd contain it in one place.

I like the one where TDubbs says something that means something and Fork says something that means nothing and sometimes they both say things that are sometimes something, but mostly nothing.

(PS:  I know, I have tons of room to talk.)

Quote from: Fork on September 22, 2009, 08:55:55 AM

Quote from: Dr. Nguyen Van Falk on September 22, 2009, 08:48:11 AM

Quote from: Fork on September 22, 2009, 08:17:58 AM

Has Visanthe whipped it out yet?

This sure was a nice thread we had here, while it lasted.

Don't worry, it will breathe by the time the Giants ass-rape the Saints.

ERRONEOUS!  Erroneous, you twinkle-toed middle aged joke ruiner.

Quote from: Fork on September 22, 2009, 07:34:52 AM

I'd actually forgotten that Checy Chase can be funny.

Who's Checy Chase?

Quote from: Kermit, B. on September 21, 2009, 02:18:13 PM

Quote from: CT III on September 21, 2009, 02:10:49 PM

Quote from: Kermit, B. on September 21, 2009, 02:03:28 PM

Quote from: thehawk on September 21, 2009, 01:45:08 PM

Quote from: Kermit, B. on September 21, 2009, 10:48:19 AM

Quote from: thehawk on September 19, 2009, 09:10:20 PM

Quote from: Oleg on September 19, 2009, 01:50:08 PM

Quote from: MAD on September 19, 2009, 01:37:41 PM
Anyone else annoyed that the Big 10 Network's got an in-state battle between Michigan schools, but two schools which are closer to Chicago, combined, than Ann Arbor can't get their game on in Chicago?   

Very.

RCN provides all 3 BTN channels in HD , great to watch NIU take it to Purdue.  Too bad MSU couldn't do the same in South Bend

You hate ND so much that you wouldn't root for them to beat a conference rival?  That's pretty dumb.

My logic is two-fold, and has very little to do with the tie-breakers (or logic- but thats College Football).

I generally root for Big Ten schools when they face out of conference competition.  I figure it makes the conference stronger in the eyes of the the voters, which helps schools like NU when it comes to bowl time (I am not detached from reality to consider BCS possibilities for NU, either when my prior post was posted, or now after they crapped the bed in the Carrier Dome). 

I can't really stand Charlie Weis, and I figured a loss to MSU would seal his fate (actually thought we shared that view)

Oh, we totally share that view.  I'm not to the point of openly rooting against the team, but I really wish he was no longer coaching at ND.  I think when they get depantsed by Southern Cal (again), it might be the final blow.

Speaking of Southern Cal, how terrible of a coach was Ty Willingham?  Washington beats Southern Cal with "Ty's guys" after he couldn't muster a single win out of them last year?  And in 2005, Weis almost did the same thing.  My Ty hatred racism is still strong.

Right.

Whatever, dude.  I have tons of friends who are college football coaches shitty relief pitchers.