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Author Topic: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread  ( 75,625 )

SMan

  • Sam Fuld Fan Club
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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #135 on: April 16, 2010, 09:45:59 PM »
Fuck you all! Yeah, thats right, fuck you! Just because someone cums and has a different way of doing things, you assholes get your panties in your hair, if you even have any unlike me baby! You all can go to hell!

But I guess its right. See, I doubt any of you have the upper edumacation you get at an ivory league school! Yeah, I went to Notre Damn you fuck heads, so suck it! The only ivory you assholes know is the stuff you cry over when you spill your beers yelling shit at your own team! Really, how fucked up are you? So being of a high edumacation like me and being a superstar in Football like me, I know that there are other ways of beating people. You know, like wornding down the other club! Sure you all get your hardons poppin over Marshall as he has his sad little 3 man innings, but let me ask you this, how exactly does that wear down his opponets? I'll tell you, it doesnt! So then you know what happens? People like Grabow and Caridad and myself have to face a un-wornded team, and it isnt easy!

So here I am doing everything I can to help the club win by forcing all the other guys with bats up to the plate, making them all swing the bat and then making them run around the bases and in the end, you have a team that is wornded out! Yeah, thats right, I am wornding them down baby! I am doing my job and you assholes still give me shit for it? Lou knows the score, Lou told me I rock! So fuck you inbred drunks! Milton was right, this is just a fucked up city with you unedumacated thinking!

So fuck you, fuck you and the Donkey you ride on!
And consider yourselves bite by the Shark baby! 

Dr. Nguyen Van Falk

  • Fukakke Fan Club
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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #136 on: April 16, 2010, 10:00:30 PM »
Quote from: SMan on April 16, 2010, 09:45:59 PM
Fuck you all! Yeah, thats right, fuck you! Just because someone cums and has a different way of doing things, you assholes get your panties in your hair, if you even have any unlike me baby! You all can go to hell!

But I guess its right. See, I doubt any of you have the upper edumacation you get at an ivory league school! Yeah, I went to Notre Damn you fuck heads, so suck it! The only ivory you assholes know is the stuff you cry over when you spill your beers yelling shit at your own team! Really, how fucked up are you? So being of a high edumacation like me and being a superstar in Football like me, I know that there are other ways of beating people. You know, like wornding down the other club! Sure you all get your hardons poppin over Marshall as he has his sad little 3 man innings, but let me ask you this, how exactly does that wear down his opponets? I'll tell you, it doesnt! So then you know what happens? People like Grabow and Caridad and myself have to face a un-wornded team, and it isnt easy!

So here I am doing everything I can to help the club win by forcing all the other guys with bats up to the plate, making them all swing the bat and then making them run around the bases and in the end, you have a team that is wornded out! Yeah, thats right, I am wornding them down baby! I am doing my job and you assholes still give me shit for it? Lou knows the score, Lou told me I rock! So fuck you inbred drunks! Milton was right, this is just a fucked up city with you unedumacated thinking!

So fuck you, fuck you and the Donkey you ride on!
And consider yourselves bite by the Shark baby!  

Shut up, Snork. You're a Domer.
WHAT THESE FANCY DANS IN CHICAGO THINK THEY DO?

RedBeard

  • Hank White Fan Club
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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #137 on: April 19, 2010, 08:38:04 PM »
Yep. Right in the nutsack. Whadda a douche.

Armchair_QB

  • Hank White Fan Club
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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #138 on: April 19, 2010, 09:18:07 PM »
Jeff Samardzija needs to die in a fire.
"I never read this book the Cardinals wrote way back in the day regarding how to play baseball."

SKO

  • Johnny Evers Fan Club
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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #139 on: April 19, 2010, 09:19:12 PM »
Quote from: SKO on April 16, 2010, 01:03:22 AM
this cuaker. he can fuckin adie. god daymint. stupid jaime hendry and his fuackin stpid conta`ts. god damn it why cant he jus die. stupiad smardizja. poeace of shit. god daanit. woud be 8-1 qwiothout that fuackeer. sonmbutch. asssshoe.e
Bump?
I will vow, for the sake of peace, not to complain about David Ross between now and his first start next year- 10/26/2015

Internet Apex

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #140 on: April 20, 2010, 07:27:31 AM »
Quote from: SKO on April 19, 2010, 09:19:12 PM
Quote from: SKO on April 16, 2010, 01:03:22 AM
this cuaker. he can fuckin adie. god daymint. stupid jaime hendry and his fuackin stpid conta`ts. god damn it why cant he jus die. stupiad smardizja. poeace of shit. god daanit. woud be 8-1 qwiothout that fuackeer. sonmbutch. asssshoe.e
Bump?


The 37th Tenet of Pexism:  Apestink is terrible.

Powdered Toast Man

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #141 on: April 20, 2010, 07:52:41 AM »
Quote from: Armchair_QB on April 19, 2010, 09:18:07 PM
Jeff Samardzija needs to die in a fire.



IAN/YETI 2012!  "IT MEANS WHAT WE SAY IT MEANS!"


Brownie

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #142 on: April 20, 2010, 08:06:47 AM »
Jeff Samardzija needs stationary bike lessons from Steve Trout and Jay Williams.

BH

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #143 on: April 20, 2010, 09:02:57 AM »
Quote from: Brownie on April 20, 2010, 08:06:47 AM
Jeff Samardzija needs stationary bike lessons from Steve Trout and Jay Williams.

And/or Oleg.


Armchair_QB

  • Hank White Fan Club
  • Posts: 817
Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #144 on: April 20, 2010, 09:09:29 AM »
Quote from: Brownie on April 20, 2010, 08:06:47 AM
Jeff Samardzija needs stationary bike lessons from Steve Trout and Jay Williams.

Mike Remlinger needs to show him how to use a recliner.
"I never read this book the Cardinals wrote way back in the day regarding how to play baseball."

morpheus

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #145 on: April 20, 2010, 09:15:25 AM »
Quote from: BH on April 20, 2010, 09:02:57 AM
Quote from: Brownie on April 20, 2010, 08:06:47 AM
Jeff Samardzija needs stationary bike lessons from Steve Trout and Jay Williams.

And/or Oleg.



More like MINI-bike lessons, amirite?
I don't get that KurtEvans photoshop.

MAD

  • Johnny Evers Fan Club
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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #146 on: April 20, 2010, 09:23:58 AM »
Quote from: BH on April 20, 2010, 09:02:57 AM
Quote from: Brownie on April 20, 2010, 08:06:47 AM
Jeff Samardzija needs stationary bike lessons from Steve Trout and Jay Williams.

And/or Oleg.



I can personally vouch for this.  Opening Day.  2004.  Never.  Forget.
I think he's more of the appendix of Desipio.  Yeah, it's here and you're vaguely aware of it, but only if reminded.  The only time anyone notices it is when it ruptures (on Weebs in the video game thread).  Beyond that, though, it's basically useless and offers no redeeming value.
Eli G. (6-22-10)

PenPho

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #147 on: June 29, 2010, 05:07:54 PM »
2 relievers off the team (Grabow to DL, Zambano to crazytown), makes sense to bring up the $10 million WR, correct?

Enters today's I-Cubs game in the 5th inning, scoreless tie.

His line:

                            IP   H   R   ER   BB   SO   HR
Samardzija            1.0   3   7   7       4     2      2
"I use exit numbers because they tell me how many miles are left since they're based off of the molested"

Saul Goodman

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #148 on: June 29, 2010, 07:18:37 PM »
Give him to the Bears already.  For free.
You two wanna go stick your wangs in a hornet's nest, it's a free country.  But how come I always gotta get sloppy seconds, huh?

Chuck to Chuck

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Re: The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread
« Reply #149 on: June 29, 2010, 08:51:12 PM »
He is under contract for 2011 at $3.5 million and, for 2012 $6.5 million.

Seriously.

The 2012 year is a team option.  Man, the Cubs got lucky there.  Hendry musta screwed up and got his normal players option clause backwards.