Desipio Message Board

General Category => Desipio Lounge => Topic started by: Quality Start Machine on July 31, 2017, 09:11:28 AM

Title: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on July 31, 2017, 09:11:28 AM
(https://www.vinyltom.com/images/wilsonj_whoo.JPG)
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: flannj on July 31, 2017, 09:07:25 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on July 31, 2017, 09:11:28 AM
(https://www.vinyltom.com/images/wilsonj_whoo.JPG)

Ok, I fucking laughed.

(Why do you make me hate myself fork?)
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on August 01, 2017, 08:17:36 AM
Quote from: flannj on July 31, 2017, 09:07:25 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on July 31, 2017, 09:11:28 AM
(https://www.vinyltom.com/images/wilsonj_whoo.JPG)

Ok, I fucking laughed.

(Why do you make me hate myself fork?)

Since the World Series, it's my job to make sure Cub fans don't lose their innate sense of self-loathing.

How'm I doin'?
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Bort on August 02, 2017, 09:25:40 AM
I hate that I got that without the picture.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Saul Goodman on August 15, 2017, 09:49:55 PM
More like Guar-on-teed bad. When will he stop sucking? Because I think that would be neat.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on August 16, 2017, 08:12:35 AM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on August 15, 2017, 09:49:55 PM
More like Guar-on-teed bad. When will he stop sucking? Because I think that would be neat.

Yeah, what the hell? The Cubs traded for Justin Wilson and got Kyle Farnsworth.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: SKO on August 16, 2017, 08:35:59 AM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on August 16, 2017, 08:12:35 AM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on August 15, 2017, 09:49:55 PM
More like Guar-on-teed bad. When will he stop sucking? Because I think that would be neat.

Yeah, what the hell? The Cubs traded for Justin Wilson and got Kyle Farnsworth.

when stupid greedy Ricketts disrespected history and moved the bullpens all of the relievers got some kind of disease that keeps them from throwing strikes. Wade Davis is walking batters at a career high rate despite his stuff seeming mostly as good as ever.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Oleg on August 16, 2017, 09:58:58 AM
Maybe it was really the Alex Avilla trade and Wilson was just a throw in?  I'm pretty happy that Caratini isn't starting.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: World's #1 Astros Fan on August 16, 2017, 10:10:14 AM
I'll say this--He's been dinged in what all but 1 or 2 of his appearances so far--including last night--but he eventually cleaned up his own mess by getting Cozart and the Vottobot to at least keep the game close.  he needs to be that guy more and hopefully this is has just been a shitty start that he's about to put behind him.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: pisomojado8 on August 17, 2017, 04:18:46 PM
Justin Wilson bears a striking resemblance to a white Felix Heredia.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Brownie on August 17, 2017, 04:20:37 PM
Quote from: pisomojado8 on August 17, 2017, 04:18:46 PM
Justin Wilson bears a striking resemblance to a white Felix Heredia.

No. He's Felix Herdia and Matt Karchner's lovechild only after contracting syphilis. He sucks.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on August 21, 2017, 08:06:44 AM
Shit, this is our karma for what happened when Steve Trout got traded away, isn't it?
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Saul Goodman on August 30, 2017, 09:56:48 PM
Is he fixed now? Maybe?
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Brownie on August 31, 2017, 11:23:23 AM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on August 30, 2017, 09:56:48 PM
Is he fixed now? Maybe?

I hope.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on September 01, 2017, 01:18:22 PM
I reserve judgement until he comes through in a high leverage situation.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Oleg on September 01, 2017, 01:49:36 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 01, 2017, 01:18:22 PM
I reserve judgement until he comes through in a high leverage situation.

Because everyone knows the higher the leverage, the more superpowers major league hitters have.

He's getting major league hitters out.  His fastball is fine.  He keeps this up and he's good.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on September 03, 2017, 06:39:02 PM
Quote from: Oleg on September 01, 2017, 01:49:36 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 01, 2017, 01:18:22 PM
I reserve judgement until he comes through in a high leverage situation.

Because everyone knows the higher the leverage, the more superpowers major league hitters have.

He's getting major league hitters out.  His fastball is fine.  He keeps this up and he's good.
the higher the leverage, the more likely a guy like Wilson, who has been struggling, can get stuck inside his own head.  Shit, he stunk out the joint yesterday with nothing on the line.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: World's #1 Astros Fan on September 03, 2017, 09:00:22 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 03, 2017, 06:39:02 PM
Quote from: Oleg on September 01, 2017, 01:49:36 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 01, 2017, 01:18:22 PM
I reserve judgement until he comes through in a high leverage situation.

Because everyone knows the higher the leverage, the more superpowers major league hitters have.

He's getting major league hitters out.  His fastball is fine.  He keeps this up and he's good.
the higher the leverage, the more likely a guy like Wilson, who has been struggling, can get stuck inside his own head.  Shit, he stunk out the joint yesterday with nothing on the line.


Doesn't your second sentence contradict your  first sentence?
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on September 03, 2017, 09:27:51 PM
Quote from: Huey Potatohead on September 03, 2017, 09:00:22 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 03, 2017, 06:39:02 PM
Quote from: Oleg on September 01, 2017, 01:49:36 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 01, 2017, 01:18:22 PM
I reserve judgement until he comes through in a high leverage situation.

Because everyone knows the higher the leverage, the more superpowers major league hitters have.

He's getting major league hitters out.  His fastball is fine.  He keeps this up and he's good.
the higher the leverage, the more likely a guy like Wilson, who has been struggling, can get stuck inside his own head.  Shit, he stunk out the joint yesterday with nothing on the line.


Doesn't your second sentence contradict your  first sentence?

Not at all. If his problems are mental, you don't want him going in with the game on the line. Joe put has been putting him into situations where he can't cost the Cubs a game. He's still not ready for prime time.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Saul Goodman on September 12, 2017, 10:22:19 PM
Update: He continues to suck ass.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: World's #1 Astros Fan on September 12, 2017, 11:02:59 PM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on September 12, 2017, 10:22:19 PM
Update: He continues to suck ass.

Thought he had gotten straightened out when he had 3 straight good outings 10 days/2 weeks ago but he's gone back to being a head case.  Even if he pitches well again the next 2 weeks I don't know how much he'll be trusted to not revert again.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 08:20:52 AM
Quote from: Huey Potatohead on September 12, 2017, 11:02:59 PM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on September 12, 2017, 10:22:19 PM
Update: He continues to suck ass.

Thought he had gotten straightened out when he had 3 straight good outings 10 days/2 weeks ago but he's gone back to being a head case.  Even if he pitches well again the next 2 weeks I don't know how much he'll be trusted to not revert again.

He's not getting another non-garbage inning until we change calendars.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Chuck to Chuck on September 13, 2017, 08:25:47 AM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 08:20:52 AM
Quote from: Huey Potatohead on September 12, 2017, 11:02:59 PM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on September 12, 2017, 10:22:19 PM
Update: He continues to suck ass.

Thought he had gotten straightened out when he had 3 straight good outings 10 days/2 weeks ago but he's gone back to being a head case.  Even if he pitches well again the next 2 weeks I don't know how much he'll be trusted to not revert again.

He's not getting another non-garbage inning until we change calendars.

5778 is next week.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: CBStew on September 13, 2017, 01:18:26 PM
Quote from: Chuck to Chuck on September 13, 2017, 08:25:47 AM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 08:20:52 AM
Quote from: Huey Potatohead on September 12, 2017, 11:02:59 PM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on September 12, 2017, 10:22:19 PM
Update: He continues to suck ass.

Thought he had gotten straightened out when he had 3 straight good outings 10 days/2 weeks ago but he's gone back to being a head case.  Even if he pitches well again the next 2 weeks I don't know how much he'll be trusted to not revert again.

He's not getting another non-garbage inning until we change calendars.

5778 is next week.
2017 seems like yesterday.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Chuck to Chuck on September 13, 2017, 01:48:55 PM
Quote from: CBStew on September 13, 2017, 01:18:26 PM
Quote from: Chuck to Chuck on September 13, 2017, 08:25:47 AM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 08:20:52 AM
Quote from: Huey Potatohead on September 12, 2017, 11:02:59 PM
Quote from: Saul Goodman on September 12, 2017, 10:22:19 PM
Update: He continues to suck ass.

Thought he had gotten straightened out when he had 3 straight good outings 10 days/2 weeks ago but he's gone back to being a head case.  Even if he pitches well again the next 2 weeks I don't know how much he'll be trusted to not revert again.

He's not getting another non-garbage inning until we change calendars.

5778 is next week.
2017 seems like yesterday.

I just ordered more checks.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: SKO on September 13, 2017, 01:50:33 PM
At this point Chuck's Jewish check jokes have cycled all of the way around from groanworthy to laughable because they're so predictable and bad, like puns.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: CBStew on September 13, 2017, 03:40:51 PM
Quote from: SKO on September 13, 2017, 01:50:33 PM
At this point Chuck's Jewish check jokes have cycled all of the way around from groanworthy to laughable because they're so predictable and bad, like puns.
He mails them in.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 04:17:37 PM
Quote from: CBStew on September 13, 2017, 03:40:51 PM
Quote from: SKO on September 13, 2017, 01:50:33 PM
At this point Chuck's Jewish check jokes have cycled all of the way around from groanworthy to laughable because they're so predictable and bad, like puns.
He mails them in.

At first I thought Stew said "nails" and I was all like, "whoa, wrong religion."
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Chuck to Chuck on September 13, 2017, 04:42:49 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 04:17:37 PM
Quote from: CBStew on September 13, 2017, 03:40:51 PM
Quote from: SKO on September 13, 2017, 01:50:33 PM
At this point Chuck's Jewish check jokes have cycled all of the way around from groanworthy to laughable because they're so predictable and bad, like puns.
He mails them in.

At first I thought Stew said "nails" and I was all like, "whoa, wrong religion."

Yeah. This is not my god.
(http://media.philly.com/images/1200*870/dixon-53289-e-wp-content-uploads-2017-06-697290_c84ad43c85f9b4f.jpg)
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on September 14, 2017, 08:11:08 AM
Quote from: Chuck to Chuck on September 13, 2017, 04:42:49 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on September 13, 2017, 04:17:37 PM
Quote from: CBStew on September 13, 2017, 03:40:51 PM
Quote from: SKO on September 13, 2017, 01:50:33 PM
At this point Chuck's Jewish check jokes have cycled all of the way around from groanworthy to laughable because they're so predictable and bad, like puns.
He mails them in.

At first I thought Stew said "nails" and I was all like, "whoa, wrong religion."

Yeah. This is not my god.
(http://media.philly.com/images/1200*870/dixon-53289-e-wp-content-uploads-2017-06-697290_c84ad43c85f9b4f.jpg)

Geez, Morph has let himself go.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Brownie on September 21, 2017, 09:51:13 PM
Yes, if the Cubs can not let Justin Wilson on the field during any actual gameplay, that would be great.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Saul Goodman on September 21, 2017, 09:51:37 PM
*loud fart noise*
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: pisomojado8 on September 21, 2017, 09:52:38 PM
Justin Wilson, meet Fred McGriff. Fred McGriff, Justin Wilson. #botheatsass
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: SKO on October 15, 2017, 10:43:21 PM
I'd like to reiterate how fucked this guy can get because if he'd just remembered how to throw fucking strikes this entire bullpen would look a lot different and save Joe from his own stupidity
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on October 16, 2017, 08:09:15 AM
Quote from: pisomojado8 on September 21, 2017, 09:52:38 PM
Justin Wilson, meet Fred McGriff. Fred McGriff, Justin Wilson. #botheatsass


Difference between the two is that Wilson't difficulties don't stem from lack of effort and/or shitgiving.

That being said, I sure hope Bosio can fix him next Spring.
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Yeti on October 23, 2017, 04:46:29 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on October 16, 2017, 08:09:15 AM
Quote from: pisomojado8 on September 21, 2017, 09:52:38 PM
Justin Wilson, meet Fred McGriff. Fred McGriff, Justin Wilson. #botheatsass


Difference between the two is that Wilson't difficulties don't stem from lack of effort and/or shitgiving.

That being said, I sure hope Bosio can fix him next Spring.

Indeed
Title: Re: The Justin Wilson Guar-on-teed Splooge thread
Post by: Quality Start Machine on October 24, 2017, 08:38:53 AM
Quote from: Yeti on October 23, 2017, 04:46:29 PM
Quote from: Quality Start Machine on October 16, 2017, 08:09:15 AM
Quote from: pisomojado8 on September 21, 2017, 09:52:38 PM
Justin Wilson, meet Fred McGriff. Fred McGriff, Justin Wilson. #botheatsass


Difference between the two is that Wilson't difficulties don't stem from lack of effort and/or shitgiving.

That being said, I sure hope Bosio can fix him next Spring.

Indeed

Wilson for Fowler. Somebody get Theo's secretary on the phone.