Exclusive: Rick Renteria’s voicemails for Theo
Since the news broke last Friday that former Tampa Bay manager Joe Maddon had opted out of his contract, the Cubs have been intriguingly silent about the job status of their manager Rick(y) Renteria. Ricky has not been, however. He issued a statement through his…
So, it’s gonna happen
On Friday, it seemed like another blow (in a bad way) to the crotch of the Cubs plans to dominate the National League for a decade or two. Just days after Andrew Friedman left the Tampa Bay Raymonds for SEVEN MILLION DOLLARS A YEAR to vice president and generally…
Time to start thinking big
This October has been different. At least it feels different. Maybe it’s because I have returned to the land of my birth from a short exile into the wilds of northern Michigan, maybe it’s because nothing in baseball seems to make any sense. The past…
Tom Ricketts fires up the fans
It’s that time of year again. Cubs season ticket holders got their annual love letter from Tom Ricketts, where he thanks them for supporting them through thin and thin and reminds them that things won’t always this be this bad and asks them if they need…
The Cubs are going to have to save baseball
It’s a tradition unlike any other. It seems like every fall baseball gets ruined for me. I love baseball, it’s my favorite sport. I think it would have to be for me to devote as much time as I do to the Cubs. But for going on 15 years now I just…
Remember when Rick Telander was coherent?
If you’re of a certain age, you can still faintly remember a different Rick Telander. He was the one “young” guy on the old Sportswriters on TV, he wrote some great takeouts for Sports Illustrated and he wrote a terrific book titled “Heaven…
Things are about to get interesting
I’ve been around long enough to have seen some shit. As a Cubs fan, it’s mostly all I’ve seen, to be honest. In the last four decades the Cubs have been good approximately eight times. Eight. Oh, how humiliating. For the last three years they…
A referendum on dumbasses
Last night’s trade of Jeff Samardzija and Jason Hammel to the A’s for Addison Russell, Billy McKinney and Dan Straily is basically functioning as a referendum on which Cubs fans are the dumbest. Â Not surprisingly it’s a several million way tie….
It’s about time Luis got his due
With a 3-4 night in Pissburgh yesterday, our boy Luis Valbuena pushed his season slash line to .288/.394/.456/.850 and his OPS plus to 132. Â He splits his time between second and third base, and oh, by the way, he’s currently the most productive player at…
The Daily Dose: Half-assed Don Zimmer tribute addition
And you thought you’d never see it again! With 1989 manager of the year, and all-around beloved figure Don Zimmer passing last night, how about we turn back the clock and do a Daily Dose just for old time’s sake? Here’s the great Vin Scully on the…
Lunatic advice for world-class dipshit Crane Kenney
Two of our favorite asshats collided this week, when Al Yellon decided to give advice to Crane Kenney now that the world knows of the secret shame the Cubs have been hiding for several months…that they gave Crane a five-year contract extension. It’s…
Tom Ricketts “Moving Forward” video: the original shooting script
The Cubs are serious about this Wrigley Field renovation stuff. Â So serious they had their de facto chairman, Tom Ricketts stare glass eyed into a camera in all sorts of casual Friday apparel to state the case why the Cubs are tired of waiting for the rooftop owners…
Maybe the whole NL Central sucks
Don Zimmer, that baseball sage best known for having a metal plate in his head (and looking like a gerbil) used to say that 40 games into any season you have a pretty good idea of how good teams are. Â Any team that is .500 or better probably has a chance to contend,…
Great moments in unnecessary batflipping
If nothing else, the 2014 Cubs will be remembered for egregious use of bat flips. Â I say “egregious” because I like to use words that look like they’re Latin for Gregory, but in fact I’d argue that these batflips are not unnecessary at all….
Nice catch, assclown
#bestspazStLouis
The State Of Being a Red-Assed Cubs Fan
There are dozens…no, probably hundreds of people who take the time to write, at least occasionally, online about the Chicago Cubs. Â Some of them are entertaining, some aren’t, some are pretty good and some are terrible. Â But for some reason, one stands…
Johnny, what do you make of this?
No regular season game gets more overanalyzed than the first one. Â It’s only natural, we have nothing else to compare it to. Â On Wednesday, the Cubs will play again, and we’ll have yesterday’s game to compare it to (spoiler alert: it probably…
Book review: George Will’s A Nice Little Place On The North Side
You might know George Will best from all those Sunday mornings he spent unabashedly flirting with Cokie Roberts back when David Brinkley was hosing the Sunday morning ABC politics show. Or, you may know him for writing a fawning tribute to the genius of The Genius,…