Pitching matchup
Reds: Edinson Volquez, 1-0, 0.87 ERA
Cubs: Trevor Immelman, 0-2, 9.95 ERA (How many over par is that?)
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Pitching matchup
Reds: Edinson Volquez, 1-0, 0.87 ERA
Cubs: Trevor Immelman, 0-2, 9.95 ERA (How many over par is that?)
Man, I can’t wait to get out of this town
And we hardly wait for you to come back, Douchsty.
Wheeeeeeeeee!!
Fontenot
Theriot
Lee
Ramirez
Fukudome
DeRosa
Johnson
Blanco
Lilly
Yuck.
Have I hit a double yet this year?
I have to catch Immelman today? WTF?
Immelman and I don’t get along.
What’s this not getting along with Cubs’ pitchers bit. Where do I sign up?
Has Hank caught TRL all year? Are we calling TRL Immelman today to bring him luck? As in Cubs win if Reds (Tiger) forget how to hit (putt)?
Help is on the way, dudes!
The Cincinnati Enquirer reports Dusty Baker is planning on significant roster changes, and that Jerry Hairston Jr. or Jolbert Cabrera could be called up.
Hairston is thought to have an out clause in his contract after a month, and is hitting .429 in Triple-A. One thing is for sure, Dusty Baker plans on making some moves. “I’ve got to get home and talk to Wayne (Krivsky) first… You’ve got some guys doing well down there. Guys we liked in spring training.” Baker said.
Come and see Mark DeRosa and I in the third installment of “Who’s the worst defensive leftfielder in the ballpark?” Tickets still available.
I didn’t know that I play second base for the Cubs.
I “blitzkreiged” through the National League last year?
3 pitches. 2 outs. Good work dudes.
3 pitches, 2 outs.
Corey you aren’t playing today because you clogged the bases last night, dude.
Shoot…these guys will swing at anything. I should be able to use that…
6 pitch inning for the worst starter on the Cubs. Nice!
I hope to be able to carve up this Reds line up and bury it in several undisclosed locations.
BREEEAAAAAAVVVVVVEEEEEE!
Sorry I’m late.
I’ve got a young dude on the mound today. No worries I’ll take good care of his arm.
My middle name is Penis.
Len my man, I don’t want to hear that OBP jive.
What is Cincy’s lineup?
Hey 23, you wanna talk some jive? I’ll talk some jive like you ain’t never heard.
N. Hopper CF
R. Freel 2B
K. Griffey Jr. RF
A. Dunn LF
J. Keppinger SS
E. Encarnacion 3B
J. Votto 1B
P. Bako C
E. Volquez P
Did you call me Coltrane?
Shitty
#25,
Don’t give none of your jive, you jive turkey.
Damn it fan….catch the ball, and sneak it into my glove. Thats why I held it low like that for so long.
Eric Patterson. I was riding busses in the minors when that punk had yet grow any hair on his balls.
You cannot keep me in Des Moines forver.
FREE BOBBY SCALES!
Guh.
If they call up JHJ I can’t be far behind, mang!
Did Dunn go yard?
Aren’t I?
1)Suspended
2) On the Tigers
Hey 27, you must have misheard, I called you a big black buck.
Nope. Struck out.
RIGHT ON!
Dunn struck out swinging. No called third strikes, dudes.
Hey Dick, Glendon’s lost some weight.
Dick Pole: That’s not Glendon.
Dead arm? Shit, I’ve got dead arms, legs, torsos, heads etc..
Don’t you dare pitch around Votto to get me. I’ll get you!
TR Lilly is me.
Hey Dusty! I’ve got a .938 OPS in AAA. You’re right though, Korey is better.
Come see me on Saturday, Gringos!
Did I mention that my alias is Peter Johnson?
Jay,
Don’t give me that OPS jive. Corey is a proven veteran.
WHAT???
Hey 47, lay it on me my man!
Look at those Cubs clogging the bases. That wouldn’t have happened if I was managing the Cubs.
I’m not arguing with results, but holy shit does Fukudome’s swing look ugly when he’s fooled.
great shot of tom arnold texting…
One out and bases loaded for Hank.
hero time
Nice.
No joy in Mudville. Hank struck out.
I would have driven it to the wall mang.
I can’t wait to bang some rails with Pat and Ron.
I lasted long enough to bat today. Baby steps, people.
Lilly walks in a run, dudes.
Fear this!
The cubs are such idiots! The bases are so clogged Lilly’s got nowhere to go!
oops
awesome, now the midget squad needs some hits
That dude is crazy lookin. I’m gonna walk him so he stops staring at me like that.
holy shit!
is it too late to change that to lollipop guild?
I’m old(er)!
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=3351418
It’s all part of my master plan. Just keep clogging the bases with Cubs.
It’s a talent to miss low on Fontenot.
How in the hell have I gotten a hit in 8 straight games?
Anybody wanna grab a champaign cooley after the game? I know a great place at Halsted and Roscoe.
EL-LES-SHOE!
Lou’s Pitcher after two innings against Dusty’s team: 19 pitches
Dusty’s Pitcher after two innings against Lou’s team: 47 pitches.
I don’t know if that means anything. But it means something.
Norris, don’t listen to Brenly. Just hack at the first pitch dude.
Don’t be cloggin’ dem bases nigga!
I haven’t kicked an old lady in the face in like two years!
flap flap flappity flap
What’s with all this base clogging jive?
Pssst…I didn’t happen in a hotel room.
Just wondering–
Does Dusty still wear wristbands?
I should have leaned into Freel there and gotten the cheap batter’s interference.
Do I wear a funny hat?
#80,
No, you happened in my hotel room. Things got a little rough.
Do I shit in the woods?
You’re making me feel uncomfortable, 76.
After the extreme effort required to strike me out, Volquez had nothing left for TRL.
I say that last fastball from Lilly was 82 MPH. Zoom!
Thou shalt not pass!
My arm isn’t as bad as my hitting….
I’ve got a gun!
School team hit for 66 runs in two innings 2 hours, 56 minutes ago
TOKYO (Reuters) – A Japanese high school pleaded for a regional game to be abandoned after surrendering 66 runs in less than two innings, local media reported on Thursday.
The coach of Kawamoto technical high school threw in the towel to spare his pitcher’s arm with his team losing 66-0 with just one batter out in the bottom of the second.
The hapless hurler had already sent down over 250 pitches, allowing 26 runs in the first inning and 40 in the second before Kawamoto asked for mercy.
This Cubs team is full of base cloggers.
I’m not sure about Cueto, but with Volquez’s control, I guarantee you Dusty can break him by the All-Star break. He should schedule the Tommy John surgery now.
What’s all this talk about WWII?
…of hoes and hoes
Misty May and Marisa Miller in the same week.
The M&M sisters.
Melt in your mouth not in your hands Pat!
After three innings:
Lou’s pitcher against Dusty’s team: 34 pitches.
Dusty’s pitcher against Lou’s team: 70 pitches.
Yeah…stupid base cloggers.
Marissa Miller is teh hotness.
Don’t forget to get your free drink after the game, fans, courtesy of a T. Brenneman.
Also, All-Nude Male Revue begins at 7.
I’m bummed I have to work and can’t watch this game. I sure hope there’s a Red Sox / Yankees game nationally televised tonight. I hardly ever get see those teams play each other.
Did they say the Reds want to trade VORP? Sign him now!!!
I think NSBB just had a me.
Remember when I walked over to field Soto’s double last night?
Keep your screaming orgasms to yourself.
We aren’t down with the Desipio Gamecast? Who knew?
Damn. The bases are clogged. What do I do?
That’s me. What’s the story with the Brenneman shiner talk?
Here I come!
How long have I been the manager of the Cubs, Pat Hughes.
I love the fourth inning.
Will I ever make it to the 5th inning this year?
Can somebody call me a cab please. I’m too tired to walk back to the clubhouse
We are just lame homosexuals, you know.
Looks like I’m back to being the #2 starter
Gabor
Thanks for the K
Love
TRL
You’re gonna have to do that about 50 more times, Votto, before you earn a spot over a proven veteran like Hatteberg.
I’m an easier out than the pitcher.
’nuff said
My ERA had dipped below 8, but after that inning it’s back over 9 again.
Good thing we’ve already gotten into the Reds bullpen this week as this rookie’s pitch count will definitely preclude him from starting the 7th, hopefully sooner.
Yes, even with Dusty calling the shots.
Guys lying about their age. Saying they’re younger then they really are. Who does that kind of stuff?
Danny Almonte: “I do”
My VORP got in the way of me catching that one.
VORP. Diving is for suckers!
1st and 2nd and no outs for Hank.
What the fuck has gotten into me?
Time for redemption
Respect us, bitches!
Hank strikes out on a bunt attempt.
Worst AB by a Cub to-date in 2008.
Yeah I suck.
Intrepid Reader: NSBB Tard
Hanke White Fan Club! ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!
Andy, change me to “comatose”.
First two runners get on, then it’s Blanco, Lilly, and Fontenot to drive them in. Ugh.
Let me show you how it’s done.
1st and 2nd and no outs Now 1 out and Lilly is trying to bunt.
Bob: Even the Hank White fan club would chuckle about that.
Len: Oh they’re laughing at something right now, you can be sure of that.
Why was I bunting again?
2nd and 3rd and two outs. Pretty productive inning so far.
Whoa what was that complicated shit Lilly just did???
There’s enough egg on your face to make a Denver omelet.
You can do it!
Am I done after this inning?
92 pitches through 4 innings. Dusty says I’m good for 4 more innings, dudes.
mmmmm….denver omelet.
I think so, #142
I can’t wait to see Tom Arnold and talk about how bad we suck.
Keep up the agressiveness, boys.
It looked like there was almost another fight in me.
I cant wait to hear us talk about how bad Tom Arnold sucks.
Did someone say “Denver”. I HATE Denver.
I made it through 5 innings!!!!
“Phewww”
-TRL
Did Lou throw a clubhouse tantrum? No tv/radio access here …
There was an animated discussion between Lou and Mike Quade about Hank bunting.
I fucking own you!
We can’t wait to enter the game.
Somebody finna be wearing Derrek’s bat in their brown eye
Dusty is teabagging this afternoon.
We’re holding back to make it a close one at the end.
112 pitches? I bet he’s nice and warmed up now.
5-1 Reds.
Mr Lieber…paging Mr. Lieber
[don zimmer voice/]”Clubhouse”
I am, what’s the word, not good.
Votto has been killing me today. I think I’ll return the favor after the game.
9.50 and rising!
Why am I warming up?
My ERA is almost a perfect 10.
Can very easily can give back four runs.
The dude is only at 112 pitches of course he’s going to pitch the 6th. He’s young and got a strong arm. Might as well use it as much as possible.
Can not can type can very can well.
can
Let’s lead the charge here Fukkake.
I am never going to play again.
2nd and 3rd with one out. Let’s see if Hank is bunting here.
Of course I’ll let the pitcher hit for himself and then change at the top of the next inning. Why waste your bench guys, dude?
How long am I signed for?
Where art thou!?
Hank singles to third. DeRo scores. 1st and 3rd.
Nice bunt!
You’ll (**# play once I #(*&# shorten your @#$@# swing, PA.
Feel the speed!
Might be a good idea to move me up in the order, say maybe 2nd?
Brill cream makes you aerodynamic.
1st and 2nd Johnson held at 2nd. D. Ward is up.
I’m really beginning to like me some Reed Johnson.
Was that Pie’s head I just saw pop up for a look?
Ward flies out to center.
Really likes Johnson
*giggle*
I should show nothing but hot chicks.
Yeah Len, I pitched a real gem today.
E
No one covers first? Cubs revert to Dustyball, in his honor.
on first?
“Well, that’s not good”
Thanks Ronnie, your profound insight and colorful commentary once again made me laugh.
What’s with me?
Griffey homers 8-2 Reds.
Are hung over or something.
Somebody get the lights on the way out!
It’s OK because Tom Arnold is singing the stretch.
I’m off the schneid bitches! Don’t tell anyone but I ate a burger before the game.
*fart*
I still can’t get lefties out
I just did some blow before singing the stretch
Please shut me up.
fake laugh
Can I talk any faster?
Thank God that was a quick inning. The Cubs can rally in the 8th.
…lets get ready for the Pirates! At least we got the series win!
How about that tag?
I am facing Eric Gagne with the game on the line in St. Louis. Jesus this division blows.
Reds
My hit streak has reached 9. DiMaggio, I’m coming for you!
If anyone can blow a 7 run lead my team can.
I don’t understand why we lost? Wait a min it was that dMN goAT? no IT WAS sTEVE BARTMAN? Hmmmmmmmmm why do the CUbs suck so much? 100 years right? Ha ha ha