How long did it take us to miss Doug Altenberger? Oh, about three minutes. That’s how bad the ESPN Plus coverage of last night’s Illinois – Purdue game was.

The color analyst was completely clueless, the play-by-play guy had no idea how many fouls anybody had and even with Dee Brown running laps around Purdue for the first ten minutes you got the feeling that the three guys in black and white would make sure this one wasn’t a runaway.

Apparently, the whole night was set up to give me a little practice in yelling at the TV during a game before Chip and Steve come back on the air this weekend.

And in the end, the two lost souls on the Illini basketball team this year, Luther Head and Nick Smith stepped up and delivered a Big Ten title, where without them, there would be none.

While Dee Brown and Deron Williams dominated the early going for Illinois, Head was the one who kept clawing them back into the game in the second half. It made sense. Purdue had the guards to go against Brown and Deron and at least stay with them, if not stop them, but Head gives the Illini what most teams can’t match. A third guard who may be only 6’3, but who has pogo-stick lick springs in those legs that make him seem 6’10 at times. When Gene Keady had to put the great Austin Parkinson on Head, it just meant that Luther would be off like a prom dress. He was. In fact, the way Parkinson was twitching after the thorough domination Head handed him, they ought to name a syndrome after him.

OK, that was weak.

As for Smith, he had a horrendous game. He had three fouls in about six minutes in the first half, then in the second half couldn’t throw the ball in the ocean if he were standing on the beach.

But in OT, they ran a play to get him a three and made it. Then on the next possession he said, “Oh, what the hell?” and threw in another one that hit the rim, kissed the Mackey Arena ceiling and dropped straight through.

But give Purdue credit, including wispy thin guard David Teague who made shots from impossible angles, and Kenneth Lowe who took the worst looking shots ever, and tied the game at the end of regulation, and near the end of overtime.

In the end, it was all Head. After Lowe’s improbable three with nine seconds to go, Head took the inbounds pass and ran past three Boilermakers like they were dragging plows. He saw Roger Powell who had leaked back towards the basket and hit him with a half court pass. Powell had to shoot over Brian Busher and his shot hit the rim, and then former Notre Dame-thug Ivan Kartelo knocked the ball off of the rim. That’s goaltending in any league, but it wasn’t called. Who was there to get the rebound? Luther Head, of course. He had sprinted from half court and was right in front of the basket. He grabbed the board, threw up a shot from an impossible angle and banked it in.

Bruce Weber went nuts. The Illini faithful in their little puddle of orange near the top of the arena went nuts and a win on Sunday at OSU means the Illini don’t have to share this title with anybody. They’ve already won their third title in four years and if they win it outright it’ll be the first time they’ve done that since Johnny Red Kerr was patrolling the paint back in 1952. Yikes.

For one night we choose to forget how pathetic the Big Ten has been this year. Titles aren’t easy to win no matter what. Nobody can tell you that you can’t enjoy it.

I posted last night about the two most disturbing moments of last night. The first was at the end of regulation in the Illinois-Purdue game when the Purdue-fanboy color analyst freaked out. Purdue had the ball in a tied game with about :30 to go. Illinois needed a stop to force OT. Only the announcer seemed to forget that. He yelled, “Illinois doesn’t realize they won’t get the ball back! They need to foul!” Sir, you can cut the Prozac in half, you know.

The other was in the Georgia Tech-Duke game. Mike Krzyzewski had on a black suit and a black golf shirt. He is, of course, the Polish Johnny Cash.

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The Cubs are on TV today, and we’re going to put up a discussion area just like we do for GameCasts, so if you’re watching the game on ESPN, listening on WGN Radio or following along on either MLB.com or ESPN.com, feel free to stop by and throw in your two cents.

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Luther stepped up when he was needed most. Thank goodness for court system continuations.

Weber thought it was weird to be back at Purdue on the other side. I think it’s still weird that he’s the Illini coach.

Thomas Jones used to wear ‘Roos. Great?

David Huh says this doesn’t mean the end of the A-Train. Sure. Whatever.

LaTroy is expected to liven up a stoic Cubs clubhouse. What, you mean party guys like Moises Alou and Matt Clement don’t keep everybody loose?

Phil Rogers says Jon Rauch is tall! YOu can’t get anything past Phil.

Herb Gould on the Big Ten Champs.

Mariotti puts down the doughnut to say that the Bears are pansies.

The Wizard of Roz says Andre Dawson’s Hall of Fame case is hurt by the next generation who all used steroids. Whatever. I think Andre’s Hall of Fame case is hurt more by his career .323 on base average.

Mike Piazza’s groin is sore. Uh….OK.

It looked for a while like Jevon Kearse was going to be Bear, but now he’s an Eagle.

Oh, boy, more Phil. He says the Tigers are happy!

Sweet little Katie Couric (gag, gag) says it’s no big deal that she gave lying, scumbag Jayson Blair a prime time interview. Nah. Anything for ratings, eh, Kates?

Jessica Simpson read in the tabloids that she was pregnant and thought she was. Come on, nobody’s this dumb. Right? Just like last night when she couldn’t pronounce bratwurst. Right? Right?

Wait, you mean Sandy Bullock’s not gay?

Sounds like Craig Hodges’ ex-wife remarried.

America’s finest news source says Jesus H. Christ has demanded full control over his next movie.