Matt Lawton? Really? That’s the best the Major League trade deadline could produce? Matt Lawton?
Don’t get me wrong, Lawton’s a nice player and a huge upgrade over anything the Cubs have as far as top of the order options go, but he was the biggest name traded on trading’s biggest day?
When the runner up is The Farns, you know trade deadline day was a bust. I’m sure the Farns is going to go over great with Bobby Cox. The over/under on Farns’ days as a Brave is 67. I heard a guy call into the morning show on XM’s Baseball Channel and ask if the Farns can close for the Braves. I laughed so hard I didn’t hear the answer. The good news is, nobody’s going to want to start any bench clearing brawls against Atlanta the rest of the year.
Phil Rogers gave Jim Hendry a D because Jim didn’t go out and get a relief pitcher. Phil is right that the bullpen is killing the Cubs and has killed them in every year of the Hendry regime. But D seems a little harsh. The only relievers traded yesterday were Ron Villone (who until the Cubs picked up Mike Remlinger, Cubs’ fans always thought was Mike Remlinger), Buddy Groom and the Farns.
Hendry is counting on Tommy John Disease survivors Kerry Wood and Scott Williamson to ride in like the cavalry and save the day in the bullpen. Could it work? Sure.
Will it work?
Of course not.
Face it. The optimist looks at the Cubs’ current situation and sees that by Friday they will have Matt Lawton, Nomar Garciaparra, Scott Williamson and Kerry Wood all on the roster.
The pessimist figures Dusty won’t actually play Lawton because Matt’s been playing right field in Pissburgh and as Dusty has said “left field is the toughest position to learn.” The pessimist sees that Nomar is playing five to seven innings in his rehab games and is pretty sure that Major League games are nine innings long. The pessimist remembers how shaky Ryan Dempster was in his first two months back from the disease and wonders if Williamson will really be that much better. Finally, the pessimist figures Kerry Wood would make a pretty good late inning relief pitcher, but not with a bad shoulder and not with two class A appearances as his only experience.
The Cubs will be more interesting later this week when the three injured guys join Lawton and the rest of the Cubs, but they probably won’t be better.
You have to wonder what Tampa Bay GM Chuck LeMar was thinking when he didn’t trade either Aubrey Huff or Danys Baez. I’m sure that the whole Manny Ramirez manage a tois screwed up all kinds of potential deals, but how could he not at least have traded Baez?
You also wonder why Jamie Moyer would turn down a chance to pitch for two months with Houston? I’m sure he’s scared of two things, 1) throwing 74 MPH fastballs with those ludicrous Crawford Boxes just 315 feet over his right shoulder and 2) getting stuck in a locker room Manwich between Andy and Roger. OK, I guess we know why he turned it down.
The rumors yesterday were exquisite, though. George Ofman and David Schuester were certain that the Cubs were pulling off two trades, the first would send Jerry the Lesser to San Diego for Dave Roberts and the second would send Rich Hill and Todd Walker and others to Texas for Alfonso Soriano. Both turned out to be just that. Rumor.
I had heard that after turning down the Astros, Moyer had given a list of three teams he would be willing to accept trades to and one of them was the Cubs. I wonder, if that were indeed true, if a Rich Hill trade would have been followed by picking up Moyer to be the fifth starter for the last two months? We’ll never know.
Are the Cubs in better shape than they were before the deadline? Sure they are. Are they enough better to have it mean something?
Nope. Sorry. But they should be in good shape to make that run to the rarified air of three straight seasons over .500. Ooh, I can’t wait to buy that t-shirt from Cubs.com.
Your’re right Ryne.
Andre was the best . . .and he did it the natural way.
Raffy got busted!!!!!!
I’ve got nothing to add. Just thought I’d follow the sequence.
Ummm, Mr. Palmeiro? We may not have met, but I think you and I will soon become veeery close friends.
Cindy, I thought you didn’t like “Kid Natural,” and that’s why you turned to me!
How much you want to bet that Dusty is so confused right now about where to pencil Lawton in the lineup tomorrow night? Dusty will be tossing and turning all night long. Maybe if Darren sleeps with him and comforts him, Dustbag just might actually use Lawton right.
The new lineup should look like this come Friday:
Lawton-CF
Nomar-SS
Lee-1B
Burnitz-RF
Ramirez-3B
Walker-2B
Murton-LF
Barrett-C
Dusty’s Lineup come Friday:
Hairston-CF
Macias-3B
Lee-1B
Burnitz-RF
Walker-2B
Hollandsworth-LF
Perez-SS
Blanco-C
Dusty just loves playing lefties so much, he’ll leave Lawton out of the lineup thinking he bats right.
And Dusty is going to be around next year?
Baker Basher
I guess Raffy is our next Dumbass Dujour!!
I don’t know anything about the “manage a tois” LeMar got mixed up in, but managing toys would have to be better than managing this crap.
Ho Ho, I think I deserve at least a look as Dumbass Du Jour. I have all the qualifications. I went up to the podium after Gary Thorne introduced me to play Take Me Out to The Ballgame on the harmonica, only to be told by Thorne that that was an hour later! I strutted out onto the stage pantomiming the shell of what my swing used to be. And I’m a goddamn St. Louis Cardinal! I want to be the second-oldest Cardinal to win the award!
Wha, they nailed Raffy? Shit. Where’s my passport??
I’m with Baker Basher. Enough is enough. I find myself getting so frustrated at watching this team. How are we just 1 game over the Mendoza Line? I don’t care if Nomar was out for over half the season–look at our friends in Atlanta. Jeff Francouer? Kelly Johnson? Kyle Davies?
It can be done. You just need the right brains…not the dustbag. It’s time…
Ladies and Gentlemen, your “Joe Morgan Dumbass du Jour” winner for August 1.
Adam, the Cubs are playing .200 baseball?
Palmeiro seemed in that appearance to be indignant over accusations made by former slugger Jose Canseco, who cited Palmeiro as a steroid user in his tell-all book. In an interview on the CBS television show “60 Minutes,” Canseco — who also testified before Congress — said he injected the drug into Palmeiro.
Mario…feels like it sometimes.
Damn you, Raffy! Before Harry ever started calling you “Palermo,” he was butchering my name and getting a hard on whenever I was in the on deck circle! I have seniority here, dammit! I put a lot of work into this award, and I thought I’d be a slam dunk. Maybe Andy can give me the July 31 DBDdJ award and you the Aug. 1 DBDdJ award.
I know my buddy Joe Morgan doesn’t like the award anymore, but…
I don’t know, Stan about the award that you win for losing, but when I have to choose just one guy for the award, I choose you, Debbie Boggs and Gary Thorne. Gary Thorne said some weird things during the introductions, like Don Sutton likes wine, I like Hockey and Gaylord likes K-Y Jelly.
I just said goodbye to my HOF chances!!!
I’m sure that they were just diet supplements ala former Bears QB Jim Miller.
Raffi pluth steroith, anyone has thith on ther gaydar?
I can still swap for an older, below-average OF a couple more times on the way to landing Steve Finley.
Screw Steve Finley, I won’t stop trading until I’ve got Brett Butler.
Wouldn’t Palmeiro actually be guilty of Contempt of Congress, since that is where he said he had never used steroids in his life (Or something like that)???
Of course, Contempt of Congress is pretty easy to avoid these days… Just become a federal judge.
I think the word you’re grasping for is “perjury”, BC, and I would be if you could prove that I’d taken them before I testified. Good luck with that.
I can’t wait to display my veteran leadership and show some of these guys how to get caught stealing at more appropriate times.
#24, I’m not a lawyer… My point is that if he lied at a congressional hearing, which it looks like he may have, then isn’t it technically COC before it is perjury???
No. 24, there short answer is “no.” COC doesn’t even exist.
BC, I’m not a lawyer either but last time I checked, contempt was for obstruction (e.g. refusing to testify) whereas perjury deals with lying. Either way, that’s not the point – you can’t prove I was taking steroids in March, so it will never get that far.
I’m the first big fish to be brought down. Everyone else has been fringe major leaugers. Odd that it’s coming so close to the end of my career and after 3,000, MLB has always had impecable timing.
Much as I hate to defend BC, COC does exist : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Contempt_of_Congress… I just didn’t do it.
I’ll COC you bitches.
Okay, let’s try that without the dots…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Contempt_of_Congress
Boy, am I all over BC, and rightly so. “Contempt of Congress” is like being “a little bit pregnant.” No such thing exists.
In BC’s mind, he gets to play Congress Judgeâ„¢, slamming the gavel, and bellowing, “You’re in contempt, Raffy! ORDER! ORDER!”
We’re winning again, bitches. Thank God for this Blum kid, he really puts us over the top.
zzzzzzzzzzzzz……………..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…………zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
“Either way, that’s not the point – you can’t prove I was taking steroids in March, so it will never get that far.”
I agree with you on that point. I don’t think Palmeiro is in any legal trouble.
My statement came in response to post #4, as I thought lying to Congress was COC and not perjury. Again I’m not a lawyer so I don’t know the difference, but I am thinking that since it was a Congressional hearing, and not a hearing in an actual court of law, then it’s just COC… Maybe it’s both, I’m not sure.
No, BC….
YOU’RE OUT OF ORDER!!!!!!!!!!
#33:
Read this:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Contempt_of_Congress
“In the federal law of the United States, contempt of Congress is the crime of obstructing the work of U.S. Congress, with a punishment of up to one year in prison and up to $1,000 in fines.
U.S. Congress generally brings this action for refusing to testify before a Congressional committee, or failing to provide a committee with requested documents. There have also been contempt cases based on bribing a Senator or Representative.”
However, this link doesn’t say if lying to a Congressional committee is Contempt of Congress or not.
My car broke down on Congress once, so I hate that street. Is that Contempt of Congress then? My brother had to come help me push it to the side, and call for a tow truck. That day was no fun.
a witness commits perjury if he: 1) makes a false statement (probably, but hard to prove he had taken steroids prior to the hearings) 2) about a material fact (check–the hearings were about steroid use); and 3) is under oath (check).
Congress could follow up with either more hearings or send him interrogatories asking whether he had taken steroids prior to testifying. Raffy would probably take the Fifth.
Not good for Palermo.
Don’t I own a pizza joint?
BC, Contempt of Congress doesn’t exist for “informal” hearings on steroid use. There is no Contempt of Congress for Raffy, because there is no way to prove he took steroids prior to March, 2005. The body of Congress legislates, but does not hand down judicial decisions, despite acting like a courtroom from time to time.
I come here to read about baseball.
I come here to read about Civics. Hurrah!
Yeah, me too…I swear it.
I think BC’s got a point. There was nothing “informal” about the hearing…they were called by the relevant committee, an oath was given, and the hearing was for a legislative purpose (to determine whether legislation was necessary to prevent steroid use in professional sports). The wikipedia listing suggests that if Congress wanted to, it could pass a resolution saying he’s in contempt and a prosecutor could take the ball and run.
Christ how many lawyers are there on this site, or did you all stay at a Holiday Inn last night?
Even better, they stayed at me!
Except that NOBODY CAN PROVE A FUCKING THING!! Leave it, will you?
Hey, we’ve got the same name.
dudes, having a cool one dude in my day off dudes.
tough weekend but if we win 4 out of 6 this wek we’re on schedule to win 90 games dudes.
cheers dudes.
Did somebody say C & C music factory? I luff them!
That’s nice Dusty, now why don’t you worry about catching the teams in front of you. Besides, I’m very unlikely seeing as you have to play the Astros and Cards a bunch more.
I said I have never ever done steroids, ever, period. …Yet (period)
Raffy should have used an interpreter at he hearings. “I was jus a leetle Cuban eemigrant, who wanted to play de beisbol”.
I guess no one noticed that even I got a shout-out during the Ryno love fest on Sunday.
That will be the first and last time my name is mentioned in the same breath as Cooperstown without spasmic laughter ensuing.
I played the game the right way too, damnit! It’s not my fault I was 3-foot-9.
Oh, and Gary Carter did a wonderful job on the Canadian anthem. He screwed it up bilingually.
The best thing about the lawyers here at Desipio is that they bill their clients while they waste time here. America, what a beautiful country.
Jo-dee! Jo-dee Ger-ut,
A fortnight’s worth of bennnnnch!
Even I know the rules of stealing 3rd base. If there are less than 2 outs, you better be sure you’re going to make it. If there are 2 outs, no big deal if you’re thrown out.
I am a lawyer, and guess what? There is an eyewitness to Palmiero using steroids prior to the time of his testimony before Congress. Jose Canseco. A lot of folks would question Jose’s credibility, but he sure got a whole lot more credible today.
Chuckles from Ivy Chat banned me from posting any comments because I always out debated him in any conversation he had with me. He asked me to give him my email address. If any of you gto huys gets a chance to relay it to him it’s the following
Cubfansswallowloadsofcum@aol.com
Let him also know hes a booty juice drinking fag who takes it in the ass. Damn that rhymes.
Thy name is JJ.
Now: 53-52
against STL & HOU: 10-11
against CIN,PIT,MIL: 10-4
against SF,PHI,NYM,FLA,COL,ATL,LAD: 14-8
End of Season: 87-75
Enough for WC?
we’ll see, dudes
Boy oh Boy!! This has been a good news week!
I pissed in Raffy’s urine cup before it was tested.
nobody wants me!!!!! i’m gonna cry again!!!!!!!!!!!!!
According to JJ, the rules contain the following:
1) When getting destroyed and when unable to make any cogent point, insult the opponent’s children for an automatic win.
Does anyone have Hendry making a waiver deal? Griffey would certaintly be available due to his salary. It’s hotter than a Bangladeshi tiger’s loins out here.
Me Grimlock think Hoops need shut up now. Me not like him and his Adam Dunn worshipping buddies. He go away now.
I’d like to thank all you fans for supporting me through the years. Getting inducted into the Hall of Fame is an immense honor.
2005 is a futile year
the kool-aid crowd, they hath no fear
everyone else knew – they had no chance
when Latroy came out and pooped his pants
Wood came up lame, Fox died on the mound
even the great Prior rolled on the ground
Dusty Baker said: Dude, we’re bound to get hot
and confirmed the suspicion that Dusty smoke’s pot.
Congratulations to Ryne Sanderson, what a ballplayer and a heck of a good-looking guy.
beautiful, Carl. I wept.
Wow. Someone defended me? Brings a tear to me eye (Sniff).