Look at us!  We're dorks!
A lot is being made of the fact that North Carolina has been made a 2.5 point favorite in tonight’s national title game against Illinois. You know it’s pissing the Illini off. It certainly is their fans.

But you know what? It sounds about right.

North Carolina should win. They’ve got more talent. For a ten minute stretch in the second half of their semi-final win over Michigan State they looked unbeatable. How many dunks did Maurice Ager get blocked? How many times did the Spartans resort to a failed alley-oop as their only offensive option?

So if you were betting the farm, you’d take the Tar Heels.

If you were betting your heart, you take the Illini. Every damn time.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t Hickory versus South Bend Central. The Illini are 37-1 after all.

Actually, this matchup reminds me of the 1993 Final Four. The Fab Five from Michigan against…North Carolina.

Michigan had more talent. They oozed talent and lottery picks. North Carolina had some talent, to be sure, but they shouldn’t have had enough to beat Michigan. But they did. Thanks to Chris Webber and a timeout he didn’t actually have. (Had they just called him for travelling like they should have, he’d have never called the phantom TO. But anyway…)

There are a million reasons why people think Carolina should beat the Illini.

For example, how is Illinois going to stop Sean May when Channing Frye lit them up like a pinball machine in the regional final?

Watching the game, the Illini did a good job on Frye when he posted up, but his ability to face up and go out to 15 feet and beyond broke them down. May is a much better post player than Frye but a non-threat outside of a dozen feet. In fact, we don’t even know if he’s a threat out there or not, because his guards never give him the ball there.

Isn’t Roy Williams going to coach Bruce Weber into the ground?

There might just be a reason why Roy’s teams haven’t won a national title yet. Bad luck? Sure. Bad timing? Of course. Roy’s overrated? Hmmm?

Look, May’s going to do damage tonight. He’s too good not to. But that’s a prerequisite for Carolina. If he doesn’t have a good game, they have no chance. Their perimeter players are just not better than Illinois. They might be as good, but they aren’t better. It’s May or bust.

All Illinois has to do to have a great shot at winning is to halve his production. If he gets 24, James Augustine has to get 12, if May goes for 30, Augustine needs 15. You can’t have May going for 20 and Augie going for four.

Jim Nantz made some dumbass comment about how North Carolina is playing for the National Championship and the Big Ten championship tonight, because they beat the Big Ten’s third place team (Wisconsin) and second place team (State) and now the first place Illini.

Well, Illinois beat the ACC’s second place team, Wake Forest by about a 1,000 points, so if they beat Carolina tonight, do they get the ACC trophy, too? Besides, if I checked, Illinois was 4-0 against Wisconsin and Michigan State, so Carolina didn’t do anything Illinois hasn’t already done.

This is the matchup everybody wanted when the tournament started. The big debate all year long had been if North Carolina’s superior talent could beat Illinois’ superior team. I’ve known that answer all along. Tonight, Illinois will just prove it.

When the going gets tough, the Illini get going.

And so do Rashad McCants’ bowels.