Desipio 2011 Fantasy Baseball Keeper League Smorgasborgasm

[Internet Apex]

Your league continues to impress with it's horrendousness. With that many keepers, it's a near certainty that there are only shitty players left to draft, unless BC has kept all of them. That leaves you with the Snorks of the world. Enjoy.

[PenPho]

Your league continues to impress with it's horrendousness. With that many keepers, it's a near certainty that there are only shitty players left to draft, unless BC has kept all of them. That leaves you with the Snorks of the world. Enjoy.

It's completely appropriate to judge the entire league based upon 13th place team.

[JD]

Your league continues to impress with it's horrendousness. With that many keepers, it's a near certainty that there are only shitty players left to draft, unless BC has kept all of them. That leaves you with the Snorks of the world. Enjoy.

This from the one guy that's worse at fantasy baseball than BC.  Now go spend that Period Fairy dollar on some malt liquor, playa!

[CT III]

Keepers

Round 3 - Jason Heyward
Round 6 - Matt Cain
Round 11 - Brett Anderson
Round 13 - Dominic Brown (waiver pick-up)
Round 14 - Matt Capps
Round 16 - Aroldis Chapman
Round 17 - Colby Rasmus
Round 19 - Wandy Rodriguez
Round 20 - Randy Wolf
Round 21 - Skip Schumaker
Round 23 - Brett Wallace

Keeping 42% of a squad (11/26) that finished 58.5 games out of first is a recipe for success.

*And...the fantasy bullying begins.

When you can keep a guy with a .667 OPS last year (Lifetime .742) and has hit approximately 20 homeruns and 145 RBIs over a 4 year career (of full-time duty), you gotta make that move. (Skip Schumaker in case anyone is wondering)

Nobody was.

[BC]

He's eligible at three positions! He may be awful, but it is a versatile awful.

[Shooter]

That's true Pen, but then again we all continue to cheer for a team that hasn't won anything for 102 years. Hope springs eternal my friend, hope springs eternal!!!

You clearly learned some valuable lessons.

[JD]

That's true Pen, but then again we all continue to cheer for a team that hasn't won anything for 102 years. Hope springs eternal my friend, hope springs eternal!!!

You clearly learned some valuable lessons.

Like locking up scrappy second basemen that suck before they can get to the open market.

[JD]

Paul Walker and NCIS

Round            Player

4th                 King Felix
5th                 CarGonzo Bean
6th                 Justin Upton
7th                 Mike Napoli
8th                 Gordon Beckham
9th                 Sean Marshall*
10th               Joel Hanrahan*
11th               Johnny Venters*
12th               Ryan Madson
13th               Chris Sale*
14th               Joba Chamberlain
15th               Ubaldo Jimenez
16th               Tommy Hanson
21st                Elvis Andrus
22nd               Kerry Wood


Suck it.

*=waiver pickups

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Paul Walker and NCIS

Round            Player

4th                 King Felix
5th                 CarGonzo Bean
6th                 Justin Upton
7th                 Mike Napoli
8th                 Gordon Beckham
9th                 Sean Marshall*
10th               Joel Hanrahan*
11th               Johnny Venters*
12th               Ryan Madson
13th               Chris Sale*
14th               Joba Chamberlain
15th               Ubaldo Jimenez
16th               Tommy Hanson
21st                Elvis Andrus
22nd               Kerry Wood


Suck it.

*=waiver pickups

I feel like I've acheived immortality now.

[Internet Apex]

How can you want to play in a league where someone kept Mike Napoli and Ryan Madsen? I'm not sure I even want to live in a world in which someone did that. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why am I asshurt about this?

[JD]

How can you want to play in a league where someone kept Mike Napoli and Ryan Madsen? I'm not sure I even want to live in a world in which someone did that. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why am I asshurt about this?

You don't understand because you're a terrible fantasy baseball player.  You're butthurt because you're mad aboot that.  It's alright.  It's fake.  You being awful at it makes you cooler and manlier.

[Internet Apex]

How can you want to play in a league where someone kept Mike Napoli and Ryan Madsen? I'm not sure I even want to live in a world in which someone did that. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why am I asshurt about this?

You don't understand because you're a terrible fantasy baseball player.  You're butthurt because you're mad aboot that.  It's alright.  It's fake.  You being awful at it makes you cooler and manlier.

You talking trash to me is not going to make me sign up for one of your queer leagues. I hope you know that. And I know I'm a bad fantasy player. In order to be good you almost have to have players on your team that you can't fucking stand in real life. It aint that deep, brah.

[JD]

How can you want to play in a league where someone kept Mike Napoli and Ryan Madsen? I'm not sure I even want to live in a world in which someone did that. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why am I asshurt about this?

You don't understand because you're a terrible fantasy baseball player.  You're butthurt because you're mad aboot that.  It's alright.  It's fake.  You being awful at it makes you cooler and manlier.

You talking trash to me is not going to make me sign up for one of your queer leagues. I hope you know that. And I know I'm a bad fantasy player. In order to be good you almost have to have players on your team that you can't fucking stand in real life. It aint that deep, brah.

I'm not talking trash.  I was stating a scientific fact.  You.  Arenotgood.  At fake baseball.


And I've never had a cardinal on my team and I've done just fine. 

[Internet Apex]

How can you want to play in a league where someone kept Mike Napoli and Ryan Madsen? I'm not sure I even want to live in a world in which someone did that. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why am I asshurt about this?

You don't understand because you're a terrible fantasy baseball player.  You're butthurt because you're mad aboot that.  It's alright.  It's fake.  You being awful at it makes you cooler and manlier.

You talking trash to me is not going to make me sign up for one of your queer leagues. I hope you know that. And I know I'm a bad fantasy player. In order to be good you almost have to have players on your team that you can't fucking stand in real life. It aint that deep, brah.

I'm not talking trash.  I was stating a scientific fact.  You.  Arenotgood.  At fake baseball.


And I've never had a cardinal on my team and I've done just fine. 

If you put that on your resume and I was the hiring manager you'd definitely get a second look. (||)

[Slaky]

How can you want to play in a league where someone kept Mike Napoli and Ryan Madsen? I'm not sure I even want to live in a world in which someone did that. What the fuck is wrong with you guys? Why am I asshurt about this?

You don't understand because you're a terrible fantasy baseball player.  You're butthurt because you're mad aboot that.  It's alright.  It's fake.  You being awful at it makes you cooler and manlier.

You talking trash to me is not going to make me sign up for one of your queer leagues. I hope you know that. And I know I'm a bad fantasy player. In order to be good you almost have to have players on your team that you can't fucking stand in real life. It aint that deep, brah.

I'm not talking trash.  I was stating a scientific fact.  You.  Arenotgood.  At fake baseball.


And I've never had a cardinal on my team and I've done just fine. 

If you put that on your resume and I was the hiring manager you'd definitely get a second look. (||)

Ok, I think that's the buttsex logo but I really don't know. Fill me in. Pun intended.