There are few things in life that when inflicted upon somebody else make me happy. I’m still a sucker for any America’s Home Video shot of a kid lining a batted ball into the crotch of his father. I love the scene in “Dumb and Dumber” when Harry is in Miss Samsonite’s bathroom after Lloyd has slipped him the TurboLax, and I was at my most morbidly happy last night watching 55,000 soggy, inbred dumbasses watching their favorite team absolutely phone in another World Series effort.
Honestly, if this is how you are going to play on the game’s biggest stage, why even bother? I’m sure there’s a tee ball team in Branson that could have made a better show of it than the Cardinals have. Since the eighth inning of game one, the Red Sox have taken them out behind the woodshed and treated them like Kobe Bryant “tips” the concierge.
It hurts. And it’s freakin’ great.
It’s nice to see that Wendell Kim got work so fast. He’s apparently wearing a Luis Guzman Halloween costume and pretending to be Jose Oquendo. Here’s my problem with blaming Jeff Suppan entirely for not scoring from third with nobody out and runners and second and third on that grounder to Mark Bellhorn.
There’s plenty of blame to go around. Should Suppan have scored? Let’s put it this way, even in his current condition, Gabby Harnett would have scored on that play.
But Oquendo has to get most of the blame there. He’s standing right behind Suppan, and Edgar Renteria is on second base. Edgar doesn’t need Jose’s assistance getting from second to third on a grounder hit behind him. Oquendo knows what spazzes pitchers are when they get on base. Remember Jason Marquis barrell roll into second base on Saturday night? All Jose had to do was to make sure Suppan was going. He wasn’t. Jose finally saw his pitcher, frozen like Bambi in your headlights and he tried to get him to go. Suppan and Oquendo’s cover story is that Jose was yelling “go, go” and Suppan thought he was yelling “no, no”. But the part that just kills me, and I can’t see this enough is Oquendo actually turns his back on Suppan in disgust. While Jose’s doing that, David Ortiz is throwing a rainbow that took about nineteen seconds to come down at third base, and gunning Suppan out.
Suppan’s a moran for not scoring. But Oquendo was a moran for not only not getting Suppan home, but then bailing on him as he was being picked off. Honestly, Wavin’ Wendell would be an upgrade over Jose. And that’s saying something.
Jose also was behind the brilliant strategic idea to send Larry Walker home with the bases loaded and one out on a flyball to Manny Ramirez that literally had him about 30 feet from the infield grass. Manny could have underhanded it to home plate and gotten Walker out.
Couple that, with Larry misplaying two flyballs in the same inning and it prompted his own brother to disown him on national TV. By the way, the whole Larry, Barry, Kerry, Marry, Larry Senior thing nauseated me. But I did like when Barry said to Chris Myers, “I’d tell him to shape up or ship out.”
Don’t even get me started on the wisdom of having Myers interview Leon from the Budweiser commercials during the eighth inning of a World Series game. I’m sure Oquendo was the brains behind that, too.
By the way, the Genius is now 5-11 in World Series play, and in non-earthquake interrupted World Series he’s 1-11. Tony better hope the New Madrid fault starts shaking this afternoon.
It’s going to take more than a full lunar eclipse to save them now.
Well, I’ve give you J Oq (pronounced "joke", not "Jay Oak")bailed after Soupy held up. But J Oq yelled, "Go Go Go!!!" as the ball was hit and Soupy stopped.
Looked to me like Soupy heard, "No no no!"
I hurt from your face, too.
Chris Myers has definitely been studying some of my old WWF tapes — you can see from his "surprised" reaction to the Leon comments. That’s even worse then some of my tete-a-tetes with George "The Animal" Steele.
I hate FOX Sports because it gives us a glowing puck, Scooter, liberal doses of McCarver, 35 promos an hour of My Big Fat Obnoxious (insert name here), a gratuitous Taco Bell promo, screeching renditions of God Bless America, Jeanne Zalasko, Kevin Kennedy (not to mention Jeanne and Kevin on the TV screen at the SAME TIME), Terry Bradshaw, 75 cameras (none of which give you a decent depiction of the strike zone), smug Joe Buck, House, M.D. and the audacity to plug an auto race that is not happening until February of NEXT YEAR!
I want Vin Scully and Joe Garagiola on my television and I want them now.
Walker being thrown out was Pujols fault. Albert’s age must be catching up with him, because he’s going senile. He broke from second on the flyball to Ramirez without tagging up. Had Walker not attempted to score, Pujols would have just been doubled off second anyway.
It’s not our fault we’ve only won one world series in the last 35 years.We’re cursed too!
1-9-8-2
woe is us
I didn’t see any baserunning mistakes. Those guys were just being aggressive. DONT TAKE AWAY THEIR AGGRESSIVENESS!!!
Gene,
Here is a website that will be allow you to vent your anger even more. And it has a great title!
http://www.shutuptimmccarver.com/
Tony LaRussa was right — those Boston caterers sure are tricky! No wonder the Cardinals have stopped playing like the BEST TEAM IN BASEBALL!
After the sox sweep us, I say we all shake hands like we did with the Dodgers. Good sportsmanship is an lost art, just like hitting for average, isn’t that right Jimmy, Reggie and Scottie.
My brother is down in St. Loo covering the Series. He and many others of the media were placed under the RF scoreboard as an auxiliary press box. One bright spot is that he is nowhere near McCarver or any of the other dopes from the national media.
I know a bar owner from St. Louis who has four box seat season tickets. He and a friend who also has four season tickets sold all 24 of their tickets for these three games for a cool $32,000. After taking away the original costs of the tickets, they each made off with about 14 grand. And Game 5 isn’t even guaranteed last night, so the buyer may really be taking it in the seat.
Who would buy tickets to a provisional game without some sort money-back guarantee? Dave, looks like your bar owner friend has as much scruples as ARod running out a bunt single. I mean, HE’LL get his money back (or credited toward 2005 season tix, as the Cubs now force us to do so they can collect interest).
Of course, like I asked, who would BUY the tickets w/o some sort of guarantee? Cardinal fan, I guess.
Mean…by god…Gene.
I got the CREEEAM!!!
Naw, man, I got da STICKEUUUMMM!
You WANT the Golden Boys?
We’ll BE THERE!!
cream, stickum, vaseline, bardahl, vagisil, Lindsay Lohan…
…sounds fun. Hope it all washes off…
BTW, I’m REEEL happy too that the Deadbirds are smoking pipe. Guess they switched the post-game roadkill buffet from raccoon to possum or free-range skunk.
Not all of us have arms like yours, Vaughn.
"Of course, like I asked, who would BUY the tickets w/o some sort of guarantee? Cardinal fan, I guess."
Keep in mind Mike, these are the same people that constructed a giant croquet wicket on the Mississippi River for no apparent reason.
Actuaklly, he sold them to someone else (possibly a scalper) and that person would be able to turn the tickets back in for Game 5 if it’s not played. He’d be out the $1500 per ticket he gave to the bar owner, but he’d get the face value of the unused tickets.
Speaking of scruples, I just talked to those guys on the phone and they said scalpers are getting double what they were getting yesterday because Red Sox fans are flowing in to St. Louis in hopes of seeing a clincher. One of the guys they’re with paid $550 for a bleacher seat in a deal made yesterday for tonight’s game. When he picked up the ticket from the broker, the broker told him he’s getting $1300 today for that same ticket.
Hey Genius, you think I’ll ever get into a game? I’m the best hitter on your bench, and not only didn’t you DH me, but I haven’t gotten even a PH attempt yet, because for some reason you think So (bad) Taguchi and Marlon Anderson can do better. Dumbass.
Stub Hub!
You can always go to our professional rapist–err, I mean scalp–, errr I mean "ticket brokers" for tickets.
Stub Hub!
Doing commercials for scalpers demonstrates that I now no longer have any integrity.
Hey, whatever happened to posting pictures of me on this site?
THERE WILL BE A GAME FIVE!
And, go home Ka-Chuck!
Why don’t you just post them yourself?
I believe Eliza is a Boston native.
#22, I was convinced that you had no integrity when I heard you on the radio trying to convince me that it’s okay for a man to wear hairspray.
And what’s wrong with doing hairspray commercials?
YOU’RE RISKING A PATIENT’S LIFE!
What? No one wants to talk about the inspired base running of Reggie Sanders? Touching second base is so much fun he likes to go back and do it a second time.
More from the desk of Tony LaRussa.
Game 4 of the World Series… Your team’s five outs away from being swept, but you are only down 3 and have a runner on and your big guns of Walker, Pujols, and Rolen are due up after Tony Womack.
But, instead of staying with Womack, the experienced starting second baseman who has been your catalyst all season, The Genius sees Francona go to the leftie Embree and what does he do?
He puts in… Wait for it… Wait for it…
HECTOR LUNA!!!!!!!
You know, the player who only hit .249 in the regular season. The player who started less than 40 games. The player who didn’t play above AA before this season.
Yeah, that’s who you want up there in that situation.
And, of course, Luna strikes out swinging on a fastball over the outer half of the plate.
—–
Please Boston, just get three more outs.
Boston wins Game 4 3-0.
The luck of the Irish has finally arrived in Boston. That beer is flowing freely in all the pubs. I bet Nomar is soaking in some suds right about now though. He’s thinking how that Chi-a-Pet look a like Cabrera is celebrating with his former teammates. I can only hope Nomar’s pride gets the best of him. I hope he desires to be the catalyst to pull the Cubs out of there neverending pit of not winning a World Series championship the last 96 years. This guy gives Boston all those years and then gets dumped, and they win the whole freaking thing. Like I said, the best therapy would be for him to be that outspoken leader the Cubs have lacked for years. He would push these bastards to the edge of pulling out all stops next year to bring that trophy to the right side of Chicago.
One more point about tonight and this sweep of a series. Boston had great players. But another thing they had was a great manager. Terry Francona managed not by the book, but by what he thought these players were capable of doing. He didn’t do anything flashy, but he did take chances. Dusty Baker needs to take serious notes to that. You go by the book, you will not win a World Series. That might get you by during the year-note……..the Red Satanic Fowl…….a lot of good those 105 wins do you now Genious. But if Dusty can’t loosen up, I don’t care who the Cubs do or do not get in the off season, this team will not win the big one. Dusty gets that lump of whatever out of his big ass, then the baseball Gods might actually be in our corner. Evidently, you don’t have to be the Manager of the Year to win a World Series after an 86 year drought.
I see the Boston players have voted Nomar a full postseason share – which is estimated to be about $200K per player. That sends a message to Theo, doesn’t it? I think that’s classy of the players, after the way Nomar was sodomized by the front office and the media.
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